*sigh* Well, I'm going to rant a little bit here, and I'm curious if any of you have ever been in the same place starting out.

Ok, so I don't have many friends.. at all.. I'm the awkward guy who doesn't have pics with friends and didn't have friends in high school because my family was too poor to afford the right clothes to wear. We lived in a small town and social status in high school is pretty much what clothes you wore and if you didn't wear the right ones, you got put in the "Nobody talk to that person" zone.

It wasn't even big enough to have different cliche stereotypes, everyone was farm raised seeing as the school was literally in the middle of nowhere. So anyways, skip ahead a while.. I am 23 years old and skinny. Not exactly "built" because i've spent years playing online video games but I don't have a chub belly nor am I fat, I'm skinny.

I tried the online game for a while and plus I was a nice guy.. for years I spent just talking to online girls and while I did meet some and I've been laid a few times off of random girls on here, it was very inconsistent and to be fair, they were probably really easy or just as socially outcast as me so they needed the attention.

I used to the "nice guy" though. The "You're beautiful" every day nice guy that drives people nuts. So about every single time I met up with a girl, we had a great time and we'd continue talking through the days/weeks and eventually she'd just start dating some other guy she couldn't stand or she would just stop talking to me for no reason at all.. I mean no reason and I would and never have heard from them again as if I committed some crime.

So even up to this day, I had been doing online stuff until actually 4 days ago and while I provide amusing conversation for girls, when ever I try to go for a number or a meet up, usually it's "oh I don't have a phone" or "I'm busy" (And they never recommend another time). I even tried to talk to this cashier at Walmart who kept smiling at me as I was shopping, so I went to her lane, talked to her a bit and I'm like "Damn it's on.. she obviously likes me, she's sending me iois out the ass."

Then I go to her ask her, "what time do you get off work?" She says "Later..." with a blank stare in her face. I ask her to hang out and she says "Yeah, I'm in a show later so that kind of stomps on any plans of us hanging out." then turns around and continues what she's doing without smiling at me ever again... wtf? So I decided this was my breaking point, years of being a nice guy and years of this shit was enough.

So the past four days, I've been going to the bar (there's only really one here) Well there's actually two bars but you will end up in a fight if you go to the 2nd bar.. it's the people you'd expect to find on the "other side of the tracks".

So now, in the bar I'm just this creepy guy who sits there and stares at women. I would say I'm just observing more than anything else because I want to see what these guys are doing differently.

I've noticed though, most girls will look at me once then turn away and this is a HUGE confidence killer for me. What goes through my mind when they do this is "damn, maybe I'm just not attractive to her or else she'd look again or keep looking."

As much as I would love to keep moving from set to set, last night there was only one cute girl there.. the bartender and she wouldn't even come near me to talk to me, she was talking to some crying girl all night.. oh well, so I went to the Bar #2 because I was already nearly drunk and IDGAF (I wasn't obvious sloppy drunk). And apparently Girls Gone Wild night was at Bar #2.. a few girls running around in their bras and panties and some just their panties.. Well duh, every guy in the bar taking their turns kept sitting next to them putting their arm around their chair and trying to talk to them, so obviously they were tired of the sausagefest that night, the only people they danced with is each other (the other girls)

So the last four nights, i've been sitting there like a social awkward reject pretty much just staring at girls who probably now think I'm a rapist or something. Were any of you ever in this spot and finally got out of the fucking slump known as the "No Sex Guy" or the "Non Attractive Guy". I just want to hear your stories of how you overcame where I was.

If you read all that, thanks.. I like to rant and I don't have friends to rant to.

Look, I understand where you are coming from. I used to be there too and not too long back.

The first thing which you need to change is that you get too affected by what people say and what they think of you. People are just people. They have no right on you, no power unless you give them yourself. Their opinions don't matter, they can be told what to do by stupid magazines and advertisements and they live their lives going with those ideas in their heads.

Now, it's all right to be "skinny". Look at Mystery. He's a tall, skinny guy too but he's good with women, isn't he? How your body type is affects this game of pick up, but not to a debilitating extent. YOU ARE OKAY.

Moving on to women. Look, it's sad or maybe not, who knows but today women want a challenge. They all think that "Nice Guys" are predictable, monotonous and boring and that they will always be needy and pathetic in a relationship hence, they don't get into one with them or give them a chance.

Now, I want to show my appreciation at the will you have to get over your issues by going to the bar. Most men don't even do that, sitting in front of screens with their private organs in their hands. Well done.

When you have to change yourself, you have to do it completely. Take an ideal figure. Someone you think is smart, intelligent, a winner and good with women and study about him. Observe his actions, his tone of voice, how he talks to women.. and try to incorporate that. It will feel weird for the first few days and while people say that that is "fake" and "not you", trust me we can NEVER completely be another person, there always is an individuality to us no matter how much different we become. It always stays.

You have a long journey ahead. And it will be hard, no kidding. Some days you will want to give it up and go back to being yourself in your own dark corner BUT remember in those times, how much you hated that. But, there will be other days too when you will get women hanging on to your words and you will spend great times with them and have a good time overall in your life. That should be enough to keep you looking forward to the next day and the day after that.

Good luck. We are always here to help.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

1. youre not that pathetic
2. youre not that far away
3. stop being the nice guy and start being funnier, edgier, and less needy
4. read don's advice a couple more times and take it to heart.


also, its creepy to ask a cashier that youve known for 5 minutes to hang out with you. go for the number first and work it from there through text/phone.

Well when I asked what time she got off, I'm pretty sure her blank stare and "Later..." response pretty much said "Not going to happen, go away." I should have walked away right there.

That's a lot to take in Don, I'd like to believe that one day, i'll be one of those guys setting up seminars/live events to help newbies. After actually being a nice guy and knowing how bad it sucks and the depression and anxiety that follows it, it's once of of the worst things to have, I wouldn't want anyone else to go through that, so I' like to think one day I'll be one of those guys helping newbies out.

Look, I am not saying do it all in one day. That's just stupid.

I just gave you a plan. You have to act on it over a period of time.

Just note it down somewhere or not, but these steps will help you if you commit to them. Personal experience.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Don is right, this shit is hard and it sucks.

Watching different people go home every night with different women and I've met a couple women and socialized but I haven't gone home with anyone in 7 nights and the shit is just getting depressing.

I'm afraid I might end up with one-itis with this HB9.. this girl is a blonde hair blue eye knock out.. she is ridiculously beautiful. She throws me a lot of IOIs but she could just be really friendly, she never asks me to buy her shit or do stuff for her, so she's not using me.

Her last bf hit her and was just an abusive dick, but I'm trying as hard as I can to play it cool and not show her too much interest. Don was right, there are some times where you'll want to give up and go back to your hole which for me is back to my computer playing World Of Warcraft *sigh* guess I just have to stick with this and do what's right.

Just go for the HB9 and ask to get her in bed, let's say she doesn't.. WGAF then, move on and find someone else, I'm sure there will be other people down the road.

Look, you don't have to always take it so fast.

Contrary to what people here might say, sometimes taking time is worth it.

I'm in a relationship right now with a girl on whom I had to work on for a month, just to kiss her. It's not because I'm too much of a coward or anything. She was worth the wait. But, I never hesitated to admitting that I was attracted to her, that I did pretty soon.

Sometimes, we need to take our time with things. Sometimes, they are worth it.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

I dont know if this is the advice you want, but its not really pick up advice...its more general life advice which rocks your pickup world because you gain a lot of confidence from it.

Do you have a job?
Two reasons why you should have one
a) money, which you will want to do the following below
b) GREAT way to learn social game. Working as a barrista in a coffee store, I learnt how to easily strike up conversation due to having to do it for a job. I started off complimenting older women, saying stuff like "You cant REALLY be 50 years old" if they showed me a "Seniors discount" card, then id ask the average customer about their day, and pretty soon I was able to make nearly any customer laugh That gave me heaps more confidence, because I felt like I was actually becoming very good at interacting with random people. Trust me, if possible get a job where you are encouraged to talk to people, and make an effort to be a good worker (because that means you are going to be trying to come across as interested etc) and naturally you are going to become very good at talking to people. I mean, especially if its part of the job

NOW - the second part
Self improvement. It is in my opinion, the very BEST way to turn any situation bright.
Its when you say "fuck everything else, im going to be the best version of me"
Its fun too, you get a cool haircut (immediate confidence difference), you go to the gym (naturally you become more confident and look better as endorphins are released and you gain muscle) and you spend some money on clothes which you think are fashionable and (more importantly) YOU will look good in.

TRUST me, i was in a similar situation, only I had never even gotten laid.
The best news is, the results from this stuff (especially the first bit about getting a job and learning to be a conversational guru!) last forever. Its what I like to call REAL confidence boosting Remember, confidence is built over life experience, you cant just make yourself confident immediately.

Of course, its normal for your confidence to go down at times, especially if youve endured some sort of traumatic event. Up to a week ago I was pretty useless and didnt want to socialise with anyone due to life events, but it comes back

If youre close with youre family, hang out with them. As lame as that sounds, it can make you subconsciously feel good, even if you dont realise it. That imo has got to do with returning to your natural comfort zone (that being if you have good relations with your family)



Please, try this stuff out. Im 99% sure you arent too ugly to pickup, because nearly nobody is. Looks barely matter, how you carry yourself DOES. If you learn to talk, learn to dress, and learn to eat well and gym, you will own.
Also, I dont mean "learn" in a negative way, im sure you already do have some convo skills Im just sayin'. "Improving" would be the better word*


Good luck buddy!

Indeed. I'm glad this girl is really slow TBH, I just wish I knew what she was thinking.

The way she talks online is COMPLETELY different than how she talks offline. It sounds like when she's online that she doesn't want to talk to me and randomly stops talking to me but offline she's always touching me.

Tonight @ our one bar lol... well two bars but only one with girls that go to it I pretty much got to grind with some girl in front of her bf and that was it, she was drunk and her bf was an obvious tool who didn't have the balls underneath those pants to tell her to knock it off or challenge anyone, he was just laughing while it happened. She grinded with quite a few diff guys.

I'm a little drunk now.. but holy shit I've gotten MUCH better at typing.. I used to not be able to type while drunk.. well would you look at that, improvement alreadY!!

Now I didn't know any routines or anything so I just ifgured... fuck it why not, I might as well introduce myself to some girls.. they all dismissed me pretty quick. I mean I'm skinny, not old.. apparently I'm just not that good looking I guess if I was dismissed that quick or given the cold Shoulder that quick. god damn..

i say keep going back to bar #2, wrong side of tracks?, girls gone wild? running around half naked?
sounds like fun
keep at it, rome wasn't built in 1 day,
for a confidence building task, try one day when your at the bar, to tell at least 1 girl you think she is sexy, and it is not fair that she is so sexy, how can you be expected to just not talk to her, she needs to stop being so damn sexy

You may not know it but you are at an advantage. Why?

You are a blank slate. You dont have much baggage yet so you have a lot of options.

1. Pick up a sport, then start eating a lot of protein every 4 to 3 hours. Preferrably swimming, baseball, boxing, or soccer. These sport help promote the formation of muscle in areas where women like.

2. You have plenty of time. Its hard when you have errands and work.

3. You dont have to worry about people you know. If you get totally blown out or some other shit, no one really cares much so you can fade into anonymity and try again no fuss.

4. You are consciously improving your conversation/seduction skills. You will attain in a few years many guys are blindly trying to aim for their entire lives.

_________________
Bow chika wow wow

think about what above said ^
good points also

Feeling kind of nervous about tonight. Gonna put on some jeans and a decent looking shirt and try out some of 60s method.

I like it, interesting stuff.. just go for it.. Build attraction right off the get go, a lot of touching, caressing and pretty much just going for all or nothing and if she gives you resistance take it as "she's probably just shy" and don't let her see you down.

Wish me luck.. will post about the results of tonight (hopefully the next morning and not at 2:30 am )

*sigh* yet another night alone..

I give props to anyone who stuck with this, this sucks ass and this is hard.

you can do it, you will get better, the rewards outweigh the risks and struggle