Okay, I'm in a pretty unique situation I think, and I have no clue how to proceed with this girl. First, a little background on me. Btw, this is a long story. If you do not want to read it, I'll understand lol.

I'm usually your typical AFC, but I've been getting much better with my game lately. Although, I don't use PUA techniques for seduction, or rather, I haven't needed to, since I've been in a committed relationship for 4 years. However, that's all changed lately. With me and my gf fighting a lot, I've decided we need a break. But my gf is not the focus of this.

As for a background on this OTHER girl: I met her in my CNA class at university (let's call her Jess), where I'm quite popular with my fellow classmates (99% being female). I'm always telling fun stories, being cocky/funny, demonstrating values, etc..being overall a good time for everyone who sits near me. Anyways, I didn't really talk to Jess at first, unless she brought up something during group conversation, but I decided to get her # anyway after closing a few other HBs. She also gave me her Facebook, so I made sure to look at her profile for interests and whatnot. A couple things stood out: 1) She's very photogenic (1000+ pics), 2) She's really flirty, 3) Despite points 1 and 2, she's actually very shy and soft spoken face-to-face, and 4) she's engaged.

Not that I really cared about her story, honestly I was busy working over another HB. But I decided to be friendly and posted on her wall. Next thing I knew, we had a 51-comment conversation about which celebrities we wanted to fuck. We sent a few playful messages over PM after that too. Still, I wasn't really reading into it much, especially since I knew this was normal talk for her.

However, later on that night, I noticed she put a status up saying she was stressed out (mind you this was 2am, while I was at work). So I texted her and asked if she was alright. She told me she and her fiance were fighting and she couldn't sleep. So I thought to myself "fuck it, I'm getting off shift in an hour, I'll just invite her out to iHop on a whim. give her a fun time to forget about her dick fiance". So I did just that: invited her to breakfast to get out of the house and have some fun. Boom, she said yes, "i'd love to". So I picked her up,  we had some chocolate chip pancakes at 4am, built some rapport, kino, etc (and I stayed away from the topic of boyfriends/girlfriends as much as possible, although seeing as she just broke up with him earlier that evening, some talk was unavoidable). It was fun, and totally unexpected.

Since then, she's always talking to me in class, texting me, etc. She's also always by my side in class and lab. It's not consistent though, which is weird. i.e. I feel like she's pushing/pulling, as some days she'll be very flirty, lots of kino/touching/play-hitting (side note: she's a martial arts instructor =D). Some of the other class mates have actually noticed too, and joked about us being like 12 year olds, or, "when's the wedding party?" Other days, however, she's more distant and withdrawn, takes forever to answer my texts, if at all, etc. Like wth, am I being played, or am I doing something wrong on these days? Anyways, moving on....

A few examples of the texts we've had:

(after telling me she hit her head)
Me: Jeez, accident prone much? Want me to kiss your boo boo better? haha
Her: Um idt ur gf would like that very much
Me: What I'm more interested in is if you'd like that very much?
Her: I'd love someone to kiss my boo boo...

(days later)
Me: Know what I want?
Her: ?
Me: Some ice cream.
Her: Omg me too
Me: Ice cream if you scream
Her: Lmao but I'm not a screamer
Me: Then what are you?
Her: a moaner
Me: I like moaners. Congrats, you passed.
Her: i'm glad

Okay, so I can only remember the corny ones, but she eats that shit up (according to her friend, she lost it on that second one lol). You get the idea. One thing to keep in mind, she's like this even though she knows I have a girlfriend (I haven't let on fully yet that I'm on a break, since we're always off and on. though I'm curious to see if that will change anything for the better, since she's admitted to screwing around in the past when she and her fiance were on a break). We've already gone out on play-dates a few times, very casual, nothing romantic. Tonight, we're going to see "Horrible Bosses" at the cinema.

Yes, yes, I know a movie is a terrible date idea for PUA, but it's not like this is our first time out and getting to know eachother, plus there's lots of raunchy humor and sex in this movie, which doesn't hurt, right? lol  I was also thinking about telling her that my gf are on a break, so she can stop tip-toeing if that's what she's been doing the whole time, but I don't want it to sound like "hey, guess what, i'm single now and this is a date" sort of thing and make it awkward, and furthermore, I don't know what types of routines I should do to build attraction (both tonight, and in general from now on).

Again, I don't even know if she's really into me, but she hasn't been hanging out with other guys this exclusively (she's actually turning down guy after guy, since word of her breakup is leaking out, every cock with legs is after her), and she is always looks forward to the next time we can hang out. So, what do you guys think I should do?

P.S. Probably the most important piece of information: This is just about hooking up. I'm not looking for a relationship (neither is she, I don't think), since we have way too much baggage and could use something fresh to clear our heads.[/b]

Okay, let's see the whole blowing hot/cold thing she is doing is the equivalent of what people here call push/pull routines, she just does it naturally. Don't read too much into it, she's interested yet she doesn't want to look easy.

Also, you're right. The quicker you dispel her doubts about your (ex-)girlfriend, the better. No one is comfortable with being the other woman. Just look her in the eye and say,"Between me and her? It's over. Long time ago." Simple as that.

And don't bullshit people or yourself, she is looking for spending time with you. She might want a relationship more than you think. If this is a good enough girl, why not give it a try? Things don't always have to end up badly, and we don't always have to make the same mistakes.

Be a man. Have an prolonged affair.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

Agree with Don Draper on push-pull.

But why havent you laid this chicc yet John?

What's the hold up?

This chicc's literally feeling you.

I read your whole post but I failed to see anything about KINO.

And Im liking your style as a newbie.

You have a natural quaities I had to fabricate;like humor.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
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Today's another cold/push day it seems. Last night I had another fight with the gf, so I just started driving. You know, to calm down and clear my head. So Jess ends up texting me to see what's up, and I tell her exactly that: I'm driving to blow off steam. of course she's curious now and asks "aww what's wrong" and I decided to mirror her situation from a week prior (about her fighting with the fiance). It hits home immediately: "yeah, I know how you feel" she says etc.

This morning continued that conversation with her asking if I was ok. I wanted to keep up the image that I always have my shit together and so I told her "You know me boo: I'm always okay lol. I'm not allowed to be down, too many people count on me." she went on to say that I deserve to have feelings too blah blah blah, and went on to ask what feelings were and if you can eat them (lol), etc. Long story short, we had a very playful conversation and I went on to confirm if we were still on tonight, and she said yes.

BUT, a few minutes ago she texted ke this:

"John can I take a rain check my best friend Amanda is in labor and I cant miss this"

How do I respond to this? Is it most likely her friend really is in labor (in which case, yeah a movie could definitely fucking wait) or could she be playing hot/cold with me? Or is it possible I fucked up somewhere and she had cold feet? So far all I've texted back is "ok". Help? Lol

Btw, to answer questions about kino, yeah it's in there. When I pull some c/f on her, I'll always place my hand on her arm or leg etc, or if we're walking and neg her a little on something small (you know, to get that "pffft, yeah okay" response, I'll put my arm around her waist and pull her in for a little squeeze, stuff like that. As for her, she's a little less on the kino during conversations, but she likes to play fight every now and then, or playfully step on my toes, etc.

Honestly, I'd love to escalate the kino, but I'm not sure how. She's mentioned before that she doesn't usually like to be touched, so the fact that she's letting me kino at all is surprising and I wouldn't want to push too far or rather, too quickly. Ex) she's incredibly slender and in shape, with the exception of a little pooch on her tummy that she's very self conscious about. Well, the other day we were lab partners (big surprise there) and she was very withdrawn when we had to practice counting respirations, which is easier if you gently place your hand on their diaphragm. She crossed her arms across her chest and everything before finally yielding. See stuff like that trips me up

I like the way you played this one as far as building commonality by telling her you're having gf trouble.

As far as the flake on the date tonight.

I guess we'd never know if her friend is truely in labor unless she provides photos(lol).

But she could be lying.

Maybe she' hving a chnge of heart.

Maybe her finace has been acting quite good today,which would cause many girls to backward rationalize thus flake.

Play it like it's no big deal of course.

Tell her you had other plans actually that you forgot,so it's actually a blessing she cannot make it.

Hey John,Im beginning to see this going down a LJBF road if you dont ramp the shit up(KINO) whenever yall do meet.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

maybe she had something happen to her in the pass where, when someone touching her freaks her out. you never know. Kinoing is about making it natural meaning, If you touch her it should be normal for her. I advise just keep doing it. Girls are always flirty. seem to me you guys have alot in common but beware, the way i look at it This might end up being in the friend zone... who has more feelings for who here? If you dont try to escalate this any more, you'll end up in the friend zone for sure.. not to sound like an asshole or anything but you NEED to lay this girl. Unless you are cool in being in the friendzone but thats a different story in its self. You both are in Rocky relationships right now with your Significant other hence why you both are drawn to each other. She interested in you, you're interested in her. For what i see is the current relationships you guys are in right now is holding you both back and i know its hard to let go of that because of the time you invested into that relationships.... maybe her more so then you (since she engaged an all). Now here is the Question... what are you trying to get with this girl? Are you trying to start another relationship or just a girls on the side? A quick bang? once you figure that out then, there is alot of ways you can go about getting what you want.

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"Live life to the fullest, never look back, remember No regrets" J.f

Okay, considering the environment we're in (in a classroom 4 days a week, with the occasional free-for-all lab) including our play dates, what would be the most effective way to build kino with her (beyond what I'm doing now)? Also, what are some ways I can turn the flirting we have into legit sexual tension?

On a side note, this girl is very intellectual, a rare synergy of brains and beauty. i.e she'll go out dancing one night, and go home and work on her robotics project before bed. She's a wicked bookworm too, write poetry and loves art/painting. Seeing as I'm an artist, writer, literary buff, and quite the techie myself, should I focus on reaching her in these areas? As in, do a portrait of her, write her a poem, etc. Or just focus on building more raw attraction?

Okay, the friend in labor thing is quite a used excuse. Well, 75% of the times it's a flake.

And k-loc is right on target when he says that maybe her ex was being a good dog today. Women can rationalize backwards very quickly, because old is familiar and comforting while new is unknown.

You need to go 'all in'. Make a bold move and (hopefully) seal the deal.

The more this thing drags on, the more chances of your ending up in 'Friend's Zone' increase.

_________________
" You're born alone and you die alone and this world just drops a bunch of rules on top of you to make you forget those facts. But I never forget. I'm living like there's no tomorrow, because there isn't one. "

I don't know if this makes a difference, but we've talked about sex quite a lot (not out of the blue, usually in response to innuendo). So far, she's revealed that she likes to give head, she has no gag reflex, she swallows (less mess) she likes to be tied up, she likes to play dress up, etc. I've revealed some stuff too, like the fact I could eat pussy for hours. You may think, so what, but check this out:

Last week, while driving in the car, we were talking about sex and something I said made her reveal the fact that she's never been eaten out. So of course I probed further (no pun intended lol) and it has nothing to do with personal preference, she's just never been with a guy who offered it. And in her own words "The extent of my fiancé's sexual experience is missionary." I more or less told her that she sure knows how to pick 'em (sarcasm), and that personally, I love going down on a woman. 

There's gotta be something specific I can do or say to convince into, for example, letting me go down on her. I know I need to be bold at this point, but seeing as I haven't kiss closed yet, I have no clue how to escalate to something like this.

One big caveat though: both of us live with family, and her fiance is always randomly stopping by (he's like a gnat that won't leave). So I winder where we could even f close that isn't tacky (like the back of my car).

Update: we're going out tonight. She wants to go dancing, so we're gonna look for a club that's doing something fun. 1) Is a nightclub really even a good idea (like, what if she wants to bring her girl and guy friends?). 2) I've never been to a club before. Am I pretty much fucked at this point?