Good luck, Mack. You'll need it.
I have noticed the same thing, in that I'm always the one trying to put forth the effort and keep things fun, while the woman just enjoys the ride, and
expects me to keep it interesting.
Much like how a woman often
expects a man to pay for all the dates, I just think it's something she needs to be broken of (change her expectations). Try telling her a couple times, that you're too tired to plan a date, but she's more than welcome to. If she at least tries, chances are she's willing to put in the effort, and is just not used to it.
If she says she'll wait until you're doing better, then she doesn't seem to be wanting to work on the relationship, but rather leech fun off of you. Any girl can leech fun, so unless you think she's totally worth it (which by your post it seems you do not), then don't wait for her to change. Find another girl, who hopefully can do better. And hey, maybe losing you will be the kick start the girl needs to realize tht if she doesn't want to lose you she should put in some effort!
