So here's the deal. I have this girl, my best friend of 4+ years, who I've always sort of had a thing for. I never did anything about it/acted on it because while there has always been some sexual tension, we've always been wary about ruining our friendship so have never really acted on it.

A few months ago I moved away from the area so we started texting each other a lot as a way to keep in touch. Then, one night about two months ago, we decided we would video chat with each other while drinking. During the course of the conversation I managed to convince her to basically strip for me (something I would've bet money against) and tell me that if we were ever both single we could date. The next morning she claimed to not remember saying anything about dating (though she did remember stripping), and we both agreed we should drop it as she had a boyfriend at the time and I had a girlfriend.

About a month later her boyfriend broke up with her, and I of course was her source of comfort. We started texting each other even more and over the course of a few weeks things started to get weird. She knew I still had a girlfriend but she began texting me things like how was she walking around her apartment naked/how long she hadn't had sex etc etc. Im not going to lie, I wasn't exactly making it hard for her to text me those things, but she knew I had a girlfriend and that it was probably innapropriate.

A few weeks later she decided to fly down to where I live now and we ended up drinking again, just this time not over video chat. One thing led to another and we ended up hooking up. She ended up telling me all of these things about how she had always sort of liked me and how we should date and how I should breakup with my current girlfriend. I realized that she was kind of my one-itis and I agreed to all these things and we were all sappy/romantic the rest of the night.

Then the morning came, and she said she had blacked out and didn't remember anything that happened. At all. I wasn't sure if I believed her and if she was just scared of what had happened so i didn't tell her right away. Instead later that night, while completely sober, I gave her a massage and she let me pretty much get to second base with her. I stopped before things got weird and told her what happened the night before, when she again, denied remembering anything.

Not being exactly smooth, I told her how I felt about her and how that the night before meant a lot to me. She in turn, told me how she loved me as a friend but didn't want anything else. I don't really know what to do at this point because that night triggered a flood of feelings that I didn't realize I had, and I really don't know what to do. I want to get over her and save our friendship but at the same time even thinking about her with other guys makes me insanely jealous. I told her that I couldn't be friends with her anymore after what happened so now Im just trying to forget her but it's miserable.

Anyone have any advice? Besides breaking up with my current girlfriend (a very good friend of my one-itis if that makes a difference, and I think it does) that is. Is there any chance that she's lying to me about her feelings? Should I just stick the course to forgetting her and lose my best friend? She's not a bad person. She has a tendency to black out when drunk and she feels terrible about what she did to me. And I made her cry when I said we couldn't be friends anymore.

I think she might not want to admit her feelings to me because we live far apart from one another and my current girlfriend is one of her best friends. Any advice please.

Hmm....I'm not sure why you're still with your current girlfriend, as I've always just broken up if I was into someone else and it seems that you're really into this girl, though I feel as though you might end up being a rebound since her and her boyfriend JUST broke up.

She might be just looking at the fact that she wants someone to find her attractive, and you were possibly just there. She knows you like her and if she says otherwise, she's probably just lying.

Right now, I'm going to say keep things going with your girlfriend, and if this girl is that much to you, I still suggest keeping a distance in order to gauge where you feel she's at. You don't want to give into her, so make her come to you. You're not someone she can just have, make her work for you.

She may have lied, merely because she might not have wanted anything more than casual sex. Girls don't want to sound like they're sluts, so they want to sleep with you...without sounding like they just wanted it.

Where to go now? Just let things calm down a bit. There's nothing else you can do seeing as you told her you didn't want to be friends. Give her sometime to grieve although if you enjoy the casual sex well then who am I to stop you.

Im all for making her come to me but her personality is such that I don't think she will. She's very scared of getting shot down and I would be very surprised even if she did have strong feelings for me and was just hiding them if she contacted me first.

That being said, should I contact her? Or should I just let it go? If yes how long should I wait?

I think the answer would have to be it depends on what you want to do with her. If you want to have her as a girlfriend, then this would probably not be the best time to start seeing as she just broke up. If you want her as a girlfriend, keep contact with her. Don't stop being friends. Keep the attraction going between you two. But you don't want her to jump from relationship to relationship. Everyone needs a "mourning" period if you will. I know you already said you didn't want to be friends, but you might want to back track and just tell her you overreacted. Continue texting hanging out, but again, make her work for you.

If you're looking for a casual lay, then I'm sure you have that down pretty much.

But wait a few days or a week before you contact her again so it makes it sound like you thought about what happened and you still want to continue talking to her.

well u already cheated on ur girlfriend and ur this is making your friendship harder but hears something you could do thats a little underhanded that she probably did similar from your notes have her come to your house just natural then act like your wasted when she comes over say u bin drinking alot and if your a good acter when she leaves the room or in front of her fall on the floor and make a noise shell come take care of you then kiss her say that u love her or something and how u want her and hold her tight but dont hurt her but be firm and look in her eyes long and hard dont look away she might say she has feeling for u to or you guys might hook up again and she cant deny anything cause she wasnt drunk keep any liquire in your house away from her then when u sober up see what she says then be like you remember everthing that happen even if you were drunk then see what she says and if this happens and i hope it doesnt if she still denies your love tell her you were drunk and your sorry if you still want to be friends with her or stop putting up with this get mad vocaize your voice and say if you dont love me why does this allways happen u know i have a girlfriend and u know how u and i feel and this still happens if it still doesnt work then say u were drunk
DO IT BRO IF U DONT ULL REGRET IT
p.s. rinse your mouth with some liquer and put some on a little so she thinks your drinking

So most of our interactions for the next few weeks is going to be through texting/IMing since she is on vacation in Hawaii. Any suggestions on how to approach this?