| im going threw a real rough patch... nothing seems to go the way i want it these days. and its getting me really down. everyone seems to be getting on with their lives and im the only one who still lives in the past and i cant see why... holding grudges against anybody, being ignorant... being mad at the world in general cause of my lack of success... and the real thing that brings me down is that i know that everything is in my hands, i can realize all those things, the only thing that is keeping me back is myself.
not a lot of things get to me but the nail in the coffin was that the girl i was after and thought that she didnt have a gf turns out she has, and she loves him...
i know a lot of guys can relate at one point to the state that im in now, feeling hopeless , non-confident , just not having that spark to go and have fun and feel good regardless of what happens, and sending people that vibe that you want to have fun , cause i have a very interactive life but something is missing , i cant show people that.
i look at the life of some of my friends that have gf's that care about them, and shit man my life looks like a rockstar compared to them. i'm either too cocky and i seem untouchable or too damn soft and non convincing.
i am by nature the kind of guy that entertaines a room of people but when a girl that im interested in or i want to know comes in i fcking turn into a different person. it's retarded beyond my understanding.
i see guys that dont deserve the love that girls i want to have give them for no logic purpose, life was supposed to be rational, its really bringing me down wherever i go im the only guy without a gf, im always the guy who fucks them and thats it at most, never the lover. i'm the guy that girls with boyfriends want for an affair and nothing more and the girls that i want for real never seem to see me as a potential partner.
it's messed up man ill tell you that, i never get depressed over this stuff, cause it happened a lot , when i wanted a gf or girls in general it didnt really went well and when i just didnt give a fuck and started to give up it happened 4 girls in 6 months , then i got the taste of it and tried to keep it going and the second i thought about i need a gf or i want to get girls it went from 4 to 0 in the last 4 months.
most of my friends look up to me, they see me as this awesome guy, always want to hang around and stuff but they keep telling me the same shit every god damn time " just let time pass it'll happen" im fcking tired of letting the time pass me... cause time is gonna pass regardless of what i do or dont. they see me as a guy that most girls would want, so why the hell dont i see that? i've been heartbroken 2 times in my life and it got to me pretty bad, stops me from taking risks from wanting to really fall for a girl.
i think im gonna take a break, focus on the things that matter to me, my hobbies my job, my education and just start fresh whenever this state passes me, cause now im the guy that ripes on everybody that isnt his close friends...
please state how you went thew a period like this... how it happened, why it happened how you got over it etc.
Peace
Vio.
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