Alot of Puas recommend to not make fun of yourself while sarging but iv also read from many that if an HB insults you or says somthing demeaning like "i bet you get no girls" you should accept it and exagerate it like "damn right i get no girls, why would any girl ever want to be with me ".
Now i understand why both of them are right but i would like to hear your toughts on this too.

That's more of an example of "laughing it off," as opposed to "putting yourself down." When a girl takes a shot at your ego, and you come back with something like that, you're essentially telling her that you were unaffected by her attempt to belittle you. In fact, you were so unbothered by it that you're willing to make a joke about it. It implies that you're secure knowing that you DO get girls, and that you're pretty much impervious to her attacks.

Picture the alternative: acting all pissy, and trying to defend yourself. Not good. It's much better to show her you don't care what she thinks.

"Putting yourself down" is when you take shots at yourself, unprovoked, out of the blue. It's different from "laughing it off" in the fact that you appear to believe what you're saying; that it's not a joke. It implies low self-confidence and low self-esteem.

Being able to take a joke, and the occasional jab to your ego, is an awesome skill to have. You don't want to be one of those assholes who takes himself too seriously.

Of course, what you say isn't nearly as important as how you say it.

Just my two cents.

YES awsome! You showed the diffrence between the 2 exceptionally. The thing is that iv been working so much on inner game lateley that i have forgotten some of theese outer game rules and i need to be reminded thanks!

NP. Glad I could help.

So Hansel. Do you mean you shouldn't make fun of yourself (without her provoking it)

For example: You should not tell funny anecdotes of things you did that were due to you acting like an idiot?

Even if she seems to enjoy it - this means she's laughing AT you not WITH you.

Am I right? Because I do this A LOT and I need to stop!! I always do this..

If a girl attacks you by highlighting a problem you may or may not have, then you have no choice but to make a joke of it. It doesn't hurt your image because, after all, she brought it up. You're just responding to it. The fact that she initiated it means that it was on her mind, and that she feels as though she needs to bring you down a couple notches.

When YOU highlight a problem about yourself, you're telling everyone that the problem was on YOUR mind. This probably means that, despite your joking demeanor, you take the problem seriously. By making fun of something you're insecure about, you're disrespecting yourself, and you're inviting everyone else to do the same.

Example: I have a friend who's had low self-confidence all his life. He knows this, and he always brings it up around girls for some reason. He'll say things like, "I feel like my awkwardness is bringing everyone down." Or, "She's probably creeped out by how I look." Girls laugh, but I think it's because they pity him, and feel obligated to laugh just to lighten the mood.

Anecdotes and stories, on the other hand, are all right, as long as you're good at delivering them; entertaining, and not longwinded. To get the most out of a story, have a friend tell it. This makes it seem more legit. If it's a story about one of your idiotic escapades, make sure that you're portrayed as a Johnny Knoxville-type idiot, and not a Fogell-type idiot who never gets laid.

Example: "My boy, Jack here is nuts! You should've seen what he did the other night on his CBR!" This story pokes fun at Jack's judgement, but it also implies that he's an exciting badass, which girls love.

Basically, if you really want to make fun of yourself, make sure that whatever you're making fun of is something lighthearted that isn't necessarily a problem or insecurity. Avoid Debbie Downer-type situations, where everyone is laughing AT you out of sympathy.

Oh, and for everyone's information, I used to do this shit all the time! Even the "About Me" section on my MySpace page was full of self-depreciation. I felt as though I was unworthy of anyone's attention, and that I had to take shots at myself as some sort of disclaimer for any attempts on my part to be cool. Needless to say, this was a dark period in my pu$$y-chasing career.

So yeah, you're not alone in dealing with this.

Wow thank you for such a detailed reply mate! I don't ever make fun (or not anymore at least) of personal traits and attributes. However I do kinda tell funny (sometimes exaggerated, for more interesting-sounding stories) stories or scenarios. Usually they are laughing really hard by the end of it - the most recent example is this one chick who before i could finish, was leaning against a bench table hiding her face and struggling to breathe. I took that as a good sign. I do try to say funny things with a straight face it seems to help.

But what I know I got to do (and I don't do too often SPAM) is DHV after the story, not just tell them something so funny about something that i did (johnny knoxville is a good exemple, so thanks) and leave it. I gotta show that actually still a guy who isn't always 'acting like an idiot' and actually has some self-respect.

Sorry I don't have any examples of such anecdotes, but next time i have one I'll be sure to write it here (if I remember) to give you an idea of what I mean

Actually I just thought of something I said the other day that I wasn't sure about..

I can't remember how we got on the subject but I mentioned how on that particular daythe back of my hair was sticking up and she said " oh I hadn't noticed" and i replied "seriously? It looks I walked into a giant frikin hair-dryer!!" to which she burst out laughing and then said something like a neg "oh but usually your hair is gelled down to your head" to which I replied "I did that to get your attention, it seems to have worked!"

I did kinda cringe from this exchange afterwards - what are your thoughts?

I wouldn't involve her specifically in the stories. It would've been better to say something like, "Yeah, I thought it would look good," or something along those lines. I can't explain why, but I've found that when you relate her to the story, it sort of makes things a bit more serious.

It seems like you know what you're doing though. Just keep practicing, and see what works!