Greetings,

I have posted similar issues regarding a female that I have been dating. Do to a recent set-back with a girl, I wanted advice on how to best move forward.

First off, we have been seeing each other for a few weeks. While there was no particular pick up technique I used, I did find the area on confidence and self-esteem to be valuable in getting the initial date. From there the relationship blossomed fairly quickly.

However, as quickly as it blossomed, it has taken a turn for the worse and in her words, she has enjoys hanging out and getting to know but, but it is making her feel overwhelmed. We had a couple romantic nights, sleep overs and f-close.

The turn came last week, when we went drinking and admired the fun we have been having and implied that it felt more than we were just dating. At the time she indicated that it was unfair for me to feel more than.

Since we were drinking that night, we've approached the topic a few days later and we both agreed that we are having fun getting to know each other and hanging out, but she added that she is feeling overwhelmed.

To me that means I gave her the impression I am trying to pressure her into moving faster than I really am. I told her that is certainly not my intent and would rather keep it simple. At this point she said to drop it and we haven't spoken since. I'm not sure if it's her way of getting out of the relationship, since she is worried I will pressure her, or if it is a test to see if I truly feel that way.

I do like this girl and continue to date her as we have. I don't want to give her the vibe of this being something that is overwhelming. She hasn't got mad and will still respond to me at times, but I do sense a coldness. My question is, do you think it's a lost cause or some way to be perceived better and make this work. I would like to keep trying with her since I'm interested, but as an outsider I need some thoughts.


guess my question is, how can I

She may have been shit testing you because she wanted a bigger relationship but tested to see if you were gonna flake.

Or she may be telling the truth. In which case you just push/pull all the way home.

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I'm less inclined ir ro be a push pull. Based on the situation, I think I rismread her intentions and realize I'm coming on stronger than she expected. I'm not blaming myself for that, since I did get many signs that she was interested in advancing. So I went along with it. Now the comment seem geniuine to how I know she has been with other guys.

Is there a good resource on push pull to get a better idea on tips to use in practice?

I'm in a similar situation right now with a chick whos absolutely nuts and I sorta like it lol.. Theres just too much back and forth drama. And as cool as she is I near just calling it quits bro. There will be others like her. Just try an maintain the proper attitude of abundance. " there's billions of women out there, everyday you step out the house it's an opportunity to meet new chicks an make new friends."

I'm not big on giving up, just trust you instincts. If you feel shes worth it then persue, if not just leave. Something better will appear really soon

i highlighted the portion which is missing an essential NOUN.

was it YOU or HER that "implied" this?

She gave me the impression that we were more than just casually dating. For example, she told me that I'm someone that she feels is more than just a short term thing. From there, she is now backing off after I came on a little stronger.

Someone above recommended push pull. I'm not sure what that means.

Push / Pull - Give her a little of something she wants, then take it away, leaving her wanting more. When you give it back to her again, she really wants it, and then you can push further, then take away again. Rinse and repeat until she's begging for your cock.

In this situation, it sounds like you started acting needy, seeing her too often, texting or calling too much, and generally not being aloof and disinterested enough. The best thing to do is to gauge her investment and always give a little LESS than she is. The simple technique that underlies this method is the 2/3rds rule. Never give her more than 2 texts / calls for every 3 she gives you. You're keeping interest and not completely cutting her out, but you're making her invest in you more than you're investing in her. (On an iPhone, you can scroll through your past text exchanges with girls really easily - when I do this, I find the interactions that went smoothly I often used the 2/3rd rule almost perfectly.)

I think your situation calls for a freeze out for 2/3 days. Give her the gift of missing you, and see if she re-engages. Take things from there, acknowledge you guys have fun together, but don't VERBALISE stuff. Talking about where your relationship is going is NOT hot. Just enjoy your time together and leave that stuff unsaid.

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