I have been having a great couple of weeks with a girl that I am interested in. We've really seemed to click very early. However, the other night, we went out and after a few drinks we got into a fight about relationships.

I don't remember how it came up, but the argument centered around dating more than one person. I basically pissed her off when I made the comment that I wouldn't be interested if she was seeing someone else. I took that as a way to show I am not the type of guy that will get played. She took it as me dictating our relationship way too early. I got a little defensive, which probably made it worse and look even more AFC. She then started going into not wanting to date someone that was more into it than her. I should point out that, we did have sex afterward but now I'm getting the cold shoulder.

I feel we are on the same page relationship wise, but she seems very cautious of me getting to close too soon. It is still a fairly new relationship, so I'm just seeking some suggestions on what the best way to move forward? Step back a bit? Wait it out and let her make the next move? Act like nothing happened? I

Well first off I understand where her issue is, and I think I know where the problem as a whole is. She's not thinking of dating as being in a relationship, more as going on dates with people, wanting to figure out who's right for her before she chooses to settle down with anyone in particular. You on the other hand seem to be thinking of dating as being in a relationship. The thing is that you can't hope to settle down with someone you barely know, well you can but being in a relationship is hardly a good way to get to know someone. I'm not going to tell you what you should or shouldn't do, because I haven't been in this situation before, but I will give you my thoughts. You're going to need to decide whether you will be fine with just being a guy that she will go on dates with, knowing that she's going on dates with other guys. Another factor to think of, you said you had sex, if she let you go bareback than I would recommend just ditching her and moving on, though going bareback is nice if she's going on other dates with other guys then that means she might be allowing them to do the same, and you don't want to catch what they've got. After all this has been decided, try to get her to sit down, explain that you misunderstood the question, explain that you had thought she was referring to being in a relationship. Get yourself back on track for going on dates with her, and just make her feel that you are better than any of the other guys she's seeing. But also make sure you are going on other dates with other women as well, don't seem too needy. Which will be hard if you're trying to make a rebound from a situation like that.

Spyder.z,

I didn't look at it like that, but I think your assessment is spot on. There has been stuff said on her part that I probably misread and put me me more in a relationship mindset. If anything, at least this happened early and made me realize that she isn't that far yet. I don't mind taking time and dating first, which makes me realize it was miscommunication more than anything.

From here though, I don't think it does me any good to try and contact her over the weekend. I sent her a text this morning, just to acknowledge that I appreciate her letting me stay over. It's probably best to let it play out and let her contact me this weekend if she is interested in talking. If not, I do see her Monday-Thursday's and can see how it goes then.

It's great to get outsider opinion on this, so thank you very much.

not a problem, that's what we're here for