Basically im not one to complain about things, i really try not to, but today i have felt so bad it's unreal. I'm 18 and it was 16 when i got rejected and i still remember the event now and it makes me so upset.

The situation was that i just started college and was feeling really good about life and my future career. Then when i was walking through college and walked past a group of girls, one of them said i was fit. The next time they walked past she said 'Hi' but i was too trapped into my tough guy act that i didn't respond and didn't know what to say. This was all before Christmas but after Christmas things started dwelling on me and i started feeling really ashamed and guilty that i didn't reply and made her look a fool in front of her friends. I also started seeing her around (Not very often) and actually seeing how good looking she was and how attractive she was to me.

The guilt that i didn't speak and that she was good looking really got to me so i started having fantasies of her being my girlfriend and her going on holiday with me and being really happy. So i decided i will approach her and maybe joke and see if i can make her laugh. So i did .... As she was walking past my room (She used to walk past quite often after getting off the bus) i waved at her and smiled, she smiled back but this is where i got it all wrong, i said 'Do you want a hug' in a funny way but my frame was nervous. As she walked on she turned back and gave me the worst cringed up face you can imagine, i laughed afterwards. But then it got worse ... i took it really personally and basically said 'ah screw it'. After college was finished that day i think her and her friends started waving at me but i 'TOTALLY' blanked them because i was upset. I then later heard her say 'Did he look?'.

Afterwards i felt GUILT yet again for being a fool and ignoring her when i should have just taken her first rejection lightly, it was obvious she felt harsh for doing it.
I started dwelling yet again and though that i need to approach her again and set things straight. By this point i was doomed and would sit around and think of her all day and how i fucked up so bad that my life was going to be shit!

After a few months i went on holiday with my family to clear my mind. When i came back she was looking at me, at this point i think she wanted me to approach her. I had another two opportunities as she held eye contact with me but it was too late the rejection kept replaying in my mind and id always think of stupid things to do to impress her and her friends. On the final day of college she stared at me for the last time, Man i mean literally stood there waiting to be approached with her puppy eyes. This point my heart was racing but unfortunately left it because i felt another rejection would leave me on the brink of severe depression. The scenes 2 years on still replay in my head of what could have been if i wouldn't have been such an AFC and just said hi instead of trying to make her laugh.

Sorry about the long post but it distresses me that i had to take such a bad rejection at such a young age and its left a scar... big time. In fact over summer i went into mild depression but snapped out by will by showing love to other people and myself.

The funny thing is i have extremely pretty girls in university running after me but i still feel the pain. Has anyone else been left this bad after a rejection from an onesis before?

My story is different but I think certain moments in life are burned in and don't go away because you still haven't learned everything you needed to learn from them.
It's like the ghost who can't pass on to the next life because of unfinished business.

I broke up with my fiancée a long time ago and I am completely over the loss of the relationship. I am not however over how I hurt her. A lot of times I can't sleep because I am thinking about the things I could have done/not done in our relationship and breakup to avoid causing her so much pain. It literally brings me to tears sometimes.

I tried apologizing, forgiving myself and a few other things but none have worked.
I think that when I have relived those experiences enough and know beyond doubt that I have learned and changed then I will be at peace and let it go. I hope so anyway.

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Dude, I'm confused by this... You got depressed after not speaking to a girl? A girl that you never actually spoke to anyway? You have other girls and it's been years but you still think about it?

Jits' situation I can understand. I still cringe at the thought of how I fucked over a really sweet girl that didn't deserve what I did to her... You never actually spoke to this girl. You ignored her, and you're the one who feels rejected? It's possible you've attached a lot of weight to this one small event, that is inconsequential. Maybe you should talk to someone about this... Those feelings are far too intense for the situation as you explained it.

So since my advice sucked I did some research and have better advice now. The situation probably isn't what is bothering you but all the "negative self talk" surrounding the situation. It probably has your mind saying "What if I'm not cool? What if I'm not desirable. What if I freeze around girls all the time?" I think it was in double your dating where he suggests writing down all of the negative self talk and write three alternate endings. "What if I'm the coolest guy in this place? What if every girl in here wants me? What if I never freeze around a girl again?" All of the negative ones will cause you to live your life without giving a fuck and lead to an unattractive lifestyle. All the positive ones will inspire you to to be prepared and ready for the exciting possibilities that tomorrow will bring. You will have to live up to your own expectations and that will lead to an attractive lifestyle.

Anyway thank you for posting and getting me to examine my own situation a little further. Hopefully in a few months my negative self talk will be replaced and my game/life will improve even more. Good luck!

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You can't forget about me, stupid. Everywhere I go ima have my own theme music.

Post traumatic stress disorder is a disorder that people develop from experiencing real trauma like war and shit like that. My dad has it from being captured and tortured in Korea by an oppressive military regime that was trying to take over the country at the time. I think you need a lesson in real hardship because you're whining about some really trivial shit right now, and claiming it to be on par with a condition that people actually suffer from.

Related: http://chiefpua.blogspot.com/2008/07/me ... uggle.html
Lift weights, eat more red meat, crush beer cans on your head, do whatever it takes to stop being such a huge vagina. Then start working toward getting an abundance of women in your life so you become immune to oneitis.

wow Jits,

i never thought of it like that.

isn't it funny how we are not so much haunted by the people who treat us horribly, but really by the ones that WE treat horribly? the really bad things we've done?

the love of my life, i was 16 (yep, young). i broke up with her in a very hurtful way, severred ties, never spoke to her again, etc.

and still think about that shit. sometimes it just replays in my mind.

damn, maybe i need to learn more from it.