One girl makes me lose ALL my natural game...



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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 2:44 am 
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Hello guys
I hate talkoing about myself but hey, what the hell. I have really good natural game and is normally the alpha of most groups.. i have girls hugging me and talking to me and shit like that all the time, and it makes me llook good :L
thats the background information anyway

now i dont get nervous around anyone, but there is areally shy girl outside my group which by chance, i suddenly took a shine to her, unfortunately, i get all worked up around her and my game goes to pot, i lose all conversational skills etc etc
now i know this is one itis but still- COME on yoou cant walk aaway from that
but because shes kinda shy, i dont want to kino, but i dont want to be friend zoned either

ANY help would be appreciated- cheers guys! :)


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 3:01 am 
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Cant have fear man. Go for it. Life and women are wonderful, if you just sit by someone else will beat you to it, than you will be kicking yourself and saying "what if..." Believe me i no, and im sure every guy on this site knows it also.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 3:03 am 
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Well you probably need to work on your state of mind when you're talking to her. I used to get like that with certain people. You act one way around them once and then you are stuck as that guy whenever you're talking to them.

When you're talking to her make a conscious effort to realise that she is just like the rest of the girls, if not even less of a deal because she's shy. You only need a few interactions with her in the frame you want to ground yourself to that frame when you see her.

For instance you are probably trying to pique her interest more because she's shy, but you don't need to do that. Her short answers and sketchy reactions aren't because she's hard to get, it's because she doesn't know what to do when a guy is hitting on her. Don't try harder, try less.

Oh, and game other girls as well, think about other things.

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"Damn girl, whatchoo want from me, I'll give you anything. You want any kind of subscription, to a magazine? Give you a potato? A mask of some sort?" -Rob Cantor


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 12:53 pm 
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thaks guys - that helped a lot :D


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 3:47 pm 
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now i dont get nervous around anyone, but there is areally shy girl outside my group which by chance, i suddenly took a shine to her, unfortunately, i get all worked up around her and my game goes to pot, i lose all conversational skills etc etc

I know the feeling bro, the exact same thing has happened to me. I actually find this type of situation very interesting and challenging...I love it. It gives me an opportunity to sharpen my game.

I've had this happen in my work environment as well. When dealing with co-workers, I am always the dominant alpha taking the lead controlling the dynamic. But, when dealing with someone at a higher 'status' level than me, for example a VP or CEO, my game will sometimes go south. However, after a few minutes, I get back into my dominant frame and hold my composure. Nine times out of ten, the person will change his (or her) demeanor and you can literally sense the gain of respect towards me.

It's a matter of quieting your mind and focusing.

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Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 09, 2011 4:53 am 
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Quote:
now i dont get nervous around anyone, but there is areally shy girl outside my group which by chance, i suddenly took a shine to her, unfortunately, i get all worked up around her and my game goes to pot, i lose all conversational skills etc etc

I know the feeling bro, the exact same thing has happened to me. I actually find this type of situation very interesting and challenging...I love it. It gives me an opportunity to sharpen my game.

I've had this happen in my work environment as well. When dealing with co-workers, I am always the dominant alpha taking the lead controlling the dynamic. But, when dealing with someone at a higher 'status' level than me, for example a VP or CEO, my game will sometimes go south. However, after a few minutes, I get back into my dominant frame and hold my composure. Nine times out of ten, the person will change his (or her) demeanor and you can literally sense the gain of respect towards me.

It's a matter of quieting your mind and focusing.
yep, they say 93% of communication is non-verbal. three types: body language, tone of voice, appearance


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 5:32 pm 
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I've had this once, and the further it went, the poorer my game become...Then I started going far with kino, when I knew I didn't have enough complience and still hoped for wonder. But wonder didn't happent I got flaked, developed one-itis and ruined all the confidence I had. Now I'm fighting with my AA all over again.

Kinda annoying.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 10, 2011 7:43 pm 
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"Natural" has got to be the most freakin' abused word in this forum. If it was up to me, I'd burn the 'natural section' altogether as it's made up of a bunch of newbies pretending that sitting up straight + saying hello = game. You actually think tossing out jokes to people you already know = natural game.

The second most abused word in this forum is "alpha". Not sure why this is so important to you guys but really, this is a PICK UP FORUM. If you're picking up women, you're doing OK. If you're freaking out over one little random girl, you're sucking. Drawing up random positive PU labels and sticking post-its all over your forehead probably won't help you pick up any women.

^This is important because if you already think you have certain PU abilities, what will you try to improve?

Start from the beginning with Chief's Newbie Challenge. Based on posts I read here, I'd say well less than 80% of members can say 'hello' to strangers with confidence, warmth, and a genuine openness for social interaction. Stop thinking that your issue has ANYTHING to do with this girl. There is no way in hell you could ever convince me that you could 'naturally' walk up to a random girl and game her in any shape or form.
Quote:
i dont want to kino, but i dont want to be friend zoned either ANY help would be appreciated- cheers guys! :)
- This says it all. You're not even close. Get going.


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 11, 2011 1:44 am 
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Man, trust me you can do this. I'm foreign student in US college with a really thick accent. I can't go and say "hello" properly because I can't pronounce letters L and R. So I say "hi" lol. And my name starts with R, so it usually takes me about 2 minutes to properly introducce myself. Kinda annoying hearing the same "Where are you from" "oh I've nevere heard of this country" thousand times, but I try to use it to my advantage.

You can do this. Just keep approaching till you get where you want.
P.S. and don't forget to analyze your approaches, but without extra emotions.


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