Dating (getting dumped by) Someone in Your Social Circle



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PostPosted: Thu Jan 06, 2011 5:24 pm 
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Ok, big problem guys. I dated this girl (one-itis) who is new to my social circle (my bf's gf's best friend). Things were going well, our friends hooked us up, thought we'd be great together, then I completely AFC'd and lost her. She was distant for a few weeks then I AFC'd and she said she needed to take a break, or the timing wasn't right and a bunch of other bs excuses.

So, I know I need to make myself scarce/freeze her out and date other girls. Which I'm trying to do. However, I've been making up excuses and making other plans outside of my immediate circle of friends because I know she will be there every time. I don't want to not hangout with my friends, but I have to see her every time I hangout with my friends. I have big time one-itis and this only exacerbates the issue! Can't stop thinking about her!

She sent a random text the other day referring to an inside joke we used to have while dating, so i'm not sure if she's trying to rekindle or something. I made sure to give her a short (cocky funny) answer and made her send the last text with no response.

What to do!?


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:46 am 
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Why are you avoiding your friends? If you freeze her out and date other girls, the more you need to show up around her being all normal like it was her fault to let you go because you're a PUAs that can get girls anytime you want.
If you give up hanging out with your friends just because of her, it shows that you're such a wimp and still the AFC that depends/workship her.
If she sends you anything, use bold and short reply, then ignore the rest of her txts.
If you feel awkward hanging around her, go game some girls while at it.
I know its hard to do with your oneitus but you gotta do it, otherwise you will always be the AFC you were.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 12:12 pm 
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This gives you an opportunity to greatly expand your social circle. Men are never more motivated than when they are cornered. She will wonder where you went / what you're up to and why you aren't begging for her attention or crying that she broke up with you.

After you freeze her out for 3 weeks (this is the average time it takes a girl to reach her peak of missing you. Absolutely NO CONTACT) You CAN go and hang out with your friends. When she sees you, act un-phased and like nothing is wrong. This is where most guys go wrong. If you accidentally show her that you were INTENTIONALLY ignoring her, then your no-contact will have done nothing. Overtly communicating a withdrawal of attention generates no vagina tingles. Also, do not start hanging out with your friends regularly, you can hang out with them ONCE after 3 weeks and then go back to taking over the world or digging trenches for your enemies.

You shouldn't have responded to her text. The reason why women text their ex bfs something after a while is two fold. One, they WANT you to be broken and to keep missing them. It is ego-gratifying for a girl to feel like she was the "one who got away." And second, it's a simply shyt test to see how much of you she has wrapped around her fingers. A cocky / funny reply was good, but you should've responded two days later, or maybe not responded at all. "Brevity is the Soul of Wit"

Finally on a more practical note, you could still hang out with JUST your guy friends. Be busy with LIFE, you shouldn't have time to hang out that much anyways. And make sure she doesn't think that you are going out of your way to avoid her, or else you are just going to reinforce your Oneitis. The reason you want to avoid her is because you have a world to conquer and no time for skirt chasing.
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If you give up hanging out with your friends just because of her, it shows that you're such a wimp and still the AFC that depends/workship her.
Amen. A lot of guys go out of their way to black list a girl after they dumped, this only symbolically reinforces her importance in your life. You must act nonchalant about it, her pu5sy isn't made out of gold.

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My Blog: www.solvemygirlproblems.com


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 9:35 pm 
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Thanks for the very helpful advice. You're totally right, I shouldn't have responded to the texts. However, I didn't want to make her think that I was overtly trying to ignore her, just kept it brief and funny and didn't respond to her next text.

The problem with the friends is that both of my friends have GF's and then it's just her and me sitting there with them being awkward, not dating anymore. I work like a crazy person and have limited time to sarge, so I would rather be out at a bar picking up girls. It's tough, I know I need to spend time with my two guy friends but I feel like it just increases my oneitis to be around her. Even though I know I should just bite the bullet and show up and act unaffected.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 07, 2011 10:19 pm 
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Excellent. You are on your way to becoming a world bestriding Alpha conqueror.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 08, 2011 12:06 am 
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i actually disagree with the point of ignoring/not responding to the text or not responding the same day. ignoring the text would come across like being angry at her because she dumped you. giving a short and friendly/cocky response as though nothing ever happened a few hrs later on the other hand would have showed her that you havent missed her and will show her that she hasnt got a hold on you (= her actions leave you unaffected). she will think: "why isnt he pissed?" this will make her question her value to you and thus could pull her in again..


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