Alright, I'm gonna keep this short, so I'm gaming this girl but she doesn't like that my online profile has this picture displayed in the background:



Which I think is hilarious. That aside though, she's telling me that if I don't change the picture she won't go on a date with me. She says: I'm being all sweet with her and now this tacky image.

Which is weird, because when we met I basically told her I wanted to fuck her on the couch in the club, but couldn't cause we were in a club.... She was still responsive after this, she was even responsive over text a few days later, she started acting weird after I gave her my profile page and start questioning the background image...

but anyway, knowing PUA, I know not to supplicate, so I tell her if she doesn't like it she doesn't HAVE to look at my profile. In which she response: Well, I don't HAVE to go on a date either.

So I'm thinking, man, maybe she's worried I'm just in it for the sex or something, so I reply:

That's right, you don't have to go on a date with me, but it would be fun. You don't have to expect much though, the only thing you'll get out of me is a good laughter and some interesting conversations.


She replies: We'll see...


So yeah, what's the deal? I'm thinking the situation is fucked, where did I go wrong? Should I have changed the picture? Should I have responded differently to what seems to be a shit-test.

Help a fellow PUA out.

_________________
An approach a day keeps the guru away.

ok so from what i gathered from that is you were with her at a club and you basically said "i want to fuck you on this couch"????

so im thinking that she's trying to change you BECAUSE she knows you really want sex from her so she's dangling the 'sex carrot' in front of you... pretty much she's trying to treat you like a dog lol... "sit... siiittttttt..." "good boy here's your reward"

she's the prize in this relationship and she knows it...

if she said that to me i'd respond like this...

Her: "well i dont have to go on a date either"
Me: "haha ok dont worry about it then ... i might talk to you later "

and thats it... thats all i'd write... although i wouldnt get into this mess to start off with but anyway yeh you get what im saying...

dont act fazed... believe in your mind that if SHE doesnt come than some other girl is going to come with you... and she'll be thinking... why doesnt this bloke care if i do or dont go on a date with him?? :S has he got some other girl to go with???

_________________
A wise man once told me
"Bros before hoes, unless hoes have no clothes!"

Cool, thx for the quick reply, I'm gonna reply back with something along the lines of: "look... I don't like to play games, I think ur cute, but we're not in a relationship yet. as soon as we have something you have the right to say something like that, but we're not there yet if you want to meet up again the choice is yours"


I'm thinking it's already a loss cause, but whatever happens happens...

so for next time what should I do to not get into this mess?


EDIT: She replies back: "I don't get your text, but don't worry about it, I was just teasing you..."

I reply back: "How cute You still haven't told me what mischief you've been up to today."

*No reply*

So yeah.... fucked up another one... what happened and how to prevent it?

EDIT2: I think I get it... I already knew she was shittesting me, I just dealt with it the wrong way, I took it way too serious

EDIT3: Last edit, I'm gonna figure this one out on my own, but just wanna say that she replied back. Would still like some opinions about this, cause I think I didn't handled it as well as I should have.

_________________
An approach a day keeps the guru away.

you shouldnt even have mentioned the "relationship" word, even worse: "we are not there yet.." YIKES!!



by responding in such a serious fashion you showed her that you care (too much)..

you should have responded along the lines of

"dont worry, i have enough stamina for both of you.."

ah yeah.... I see... too serious too soon, gotcha...

What do you mean by that last line though, I don't get it.

_________________
An approach a day keeps the guru away.

the last line would have been the correct response for her request concerning removing the picture..its a cocky way of saying that you have enough energy for both her and the girl on the poster..

aaaah I see... yea that would've been better than my response She's still responding but not as enthusiastic as she used to... oh well, time to go out and get some new ones I suppose. Damn... I really liked this one too

_________________
An approach a day keeps the guru away.

My friend, let go of the balls and let them swing free. Stop with the mind games and the attempts at all the witty responses. Be a lot more direct with her. Don't try to act like you don't care about dating her because you do. I've lost plenty of girls that way. Sometimes you just have to let go of the balls and go out like a man after what you want (without begging or desperation of course).

BRO. You need to break the ice. Too much teasing/bullshit going on. Girls KNOW that you like them. Don't try to hide it. Show that you're a man. You think that she's not planning out what to say back to you like you are now? I am telling you to break these plans so you can set it straight so that both of you will be comfortable around each other and actually know the direction you two are heading IN. Right now it's still a form of child's play with a lot of bullshitting going on. Break the ice by kino escalation, not with some lame bullshit text saying, "Hey...I like you." Don't even say it directly or indirectly. Stop the texting and meet her in person.

There is another form of magic when meeting up in person. There isn't enough time to think of witty shit to say, there is less courage to talk shit to one another. In essence, you head in the right direction faster if you actually communicate with her in person because it's a lot more direct.

If you still want to text her something, CALL her instead out of surprise. That way you minimize the bullshit by eliminating the ability to ignore (unless she hangs up on you). Texting man...texting is a very suspicious form of communication. You get blown off by not receiving anymore texts, girls have the time to plan out what they're going to say...etc.

I don't get it, have you missed the part where I told her I wanted to fuck her? but couldn't cause of the situation (creating sexual tension), also we were dancing close all night, kino escalating, etc... thinking back about it I should've pulled here then and there.

I'm just having problems with getting the day 2 to continue where we left off.

_________________
An approach a day keeps the guru away.

I totally agree with Savlon the point is not to be needy and non-caring. Next time u ask her out i tried this today it worked, be like "Hey im going to (place) with my friends if you wanna come, even if u dont come its COOL, im going anyways. i thought i could pick u up on the way if u wanna com.. YES cool. she says NO just say OK talk to you later then

Oh yeah. Look, telling her that you wanted to fuck her seems kind of awkward and disappointing for a girl. If I was that girl, I would think, "Am I some dog or something??" That doesn't create any sexual tension, that turns her off. It shows you're in it for the sex and stuff. If anything, it would have been least better to say "I wanted to give you head". Anyways, both responses are lame.

Look, your mission now is to get to Day 2. CALL her, that is your only chance now...or if you see her again in person. After all that texting bullshit, calling her would be like a surprise for her and it will really help the both of you right now since it's more direct and natural as opposed to texting -.- If she doesn't answer your call, she's either busy or doesn't want to answer. In any case, don't call her again or text her until she does. If she doesn't, then it's over (unless if she texts you/calls you back way late by a few days where you can ask her who she is again just to make everything interesting once more).

NOW, if she doesn't answer your call, leave a voice message saying: "Hey I want to show you this interesting place, you won't believe what-" and then hang up...

The reason I put show instead of take is so it doesn't sound like a date where she expects you to feel like fucking her again. If she responds back, just tell to meet you somewhere from where you can take her. If she asks what you wanted to tell her, just say, "I'll tell you when we get there." Now as for the place. Think of a good place you can take her to. The zoo, the museum, whatever. Just take her somewhere cool and interesting that calls upon intelligence unlike a party or a club. For example, you take her to a historical museum and there you can say things like, "Did you know that people back then..." just use your knowledge to intrigue her. If there were fake people with old clothes in a part of the museum I would do something like, "You see how people used to dress more conservatively back then, they're not even attractive but when I look at you...I see a pretty girl with green eyes..." and you know, just slowing my speech down and turning the tables to something romantic. Call upon your knowledge from childhood about animals, history (depending on the type of museum or place your at) and intrigue her. Then after the museum stuff or whatever, I would walk with her through a park that has swings and get on the swings with her and then push her on the swing and then building that up to making out with her from behind while she's on the swing...It's just basically doing things to her and seeing her reaction. You want to pull some strings, but let her pull some as well so it doesn't look like you really need to get into her pants and plus...it makes her more comfortable escalating at her own pace as well.

It's about turning the day into something romantic. It will really show that you're not in it for the sex and girls literally DREAM of these kind of romantic things that they see in movies. You are there to make them come true and that's how you can win her heart over.

Unlike most people on here, I don't believe in all the, "Don't take it too seriously until the 10th date" crap. It doesn't matter if you've only known her for a few days, you can win her heart over instantly if you know how to do it. But I mean it's about your goals man. If you just want sex, then you could still take my approach but by escalating even more by taking her home and stuff (if she complies) and if you succeed with the sex part...you'll just feel like a dick for what you put her through and what your final intention was.

If you think all of this is AFC, it is not, it's being seductive. Spending money on a girl doesn't necessarily mean you're being an AFC. It just matters HOW you do it. In this case you're doing it with mystery and interest as well as romance. You're not exactly kissing up to her or anything, you're just setting up a good time WITH her without caring if she rejects you or not.

Yea I get ya, being romantic and shit is awesome when you do it right. I got all the "I wanna fuck you" shit from the top guys I'm following now, mainly Nick Quick (Adonis) from SNL, Captain Jack and Alan Roger Currie (MODE ONE BABY!). I did indirect for so long and I get way better responses when just going direct. I'm still experimenting with the uber-direct stuff like telling them early on you want to fuck. The reason behind it is to show you're a sexual creature and you don't apologize for it. I still qualify to show that I won't fuck anything that moves though. Their style of game is mainly for quick lays (SNL = Same night lays). I followed them because I was having a hard time getting day 2's since forever, so I figured... you have to sleep with them as soon as possible if you want to get the girl. It's the only reason I do it, I DO want a relationship eventually, I just figured it comes after sex

My goal is to get intimate since day 1, getting her into bed a.s.a.p. and then building from there.

I was actually thinking for a day 2 something simple like going shopping (she what she likes, entering shops, trying on clothes, teasing her about it, etc), having a drink, etc

I prefer text, it's easier for me cause everything is slowed down. And if Race De Priest has so much success with text, why shouldn't I? But I'm gonna try calling her soon, can't do it SPAM cause I just send a text (woops!) and I don't wanna come off as needy obviously

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An approach a day keeps the guru away.

Ah. I can see where you're coming from but that stuff won't work on a serious girl. It depends on two things: The type of girl she is, and the way you appear. Maybe it worked for those guys because they had muscle or something. Not everyone can say the same thing and have the same success with it you know. What you're trying to do is to pull off some crazy tactic that only works with a certain type of girl and from that you will have many failures along the way. It's kind of like shooting your gun out in the forest hoping to hear something fall out of a tree. The best way to go is to have your own set of principles to go by so that you can adapt in any situation no matter the type of girl.

You focus too much on seeing things your way. Sure that telling a girl that you want to fuck shows that you are a sexual creature, but are you really that sure she thinks the same? Or does she think, "He's just a horny fuck.."? Listen, I don't know about those guys but an alpha male who truly gets ass does not act that way with women. Those guys' style of game that you're talking about is mainly for quick lays under the right circumstances (they met a slut/the girl was drunk/it was after their 40th failure, etc.).

You came up with this theory of having to sleep with them as soon as possible to get the girl because of your failure of getting to day 2 with them. What you're trying to do is a quick bandage that barely works so it won't be long before you'll change it yet again.

Now I would like to challenge you on the sleeping asap with them thing in order to get them. Most girls if not all, view an SNL as something just for fun. So even if you do happen to pull off an SNL, don't expect a day 2 from that either. Tell me what they will come back for on day 2 after fucking them the night before. What are they going to tell you the next day, "Oh your cock was so big that I just want to meet again". You get my point.

Look. If you want to get a girl and get to day 2, you have to attack their emotions as if it is going into a relationship and not a good night's smashin'. You couldn't get day 2's before because you were too indirect in a non-sexual way. Now since that failed you, you have jumped to the other end of the spectrum to try being direct in a very sexual way.

...The secret lies within being direct in a non-sexual way. With that comes a lot less texting, more calling, more face-to-face interaction, same old kino, and no sexual dirty talk unless you're already having sex with her. Bonuses: romantic acts, going to interesting places. You can still text her, but make the texting more direct and short in a serious manner. For texting, I would say to avoid humor and go more with using it for saying sweet things or capturing interest/creating mystery.

That shopping thing you said was a great idea that you can do with a girl by the way.

And as for that background...it's good to take it down. You probably don't want to now because you want to hold your beef but I must say that that girl is right. Trying to be a man about something like that doesn't demonstrate high value, it demonstrates low value because you're trying to be a man over something stupid. In other words, it's useless trying to prove that you're a man by keeping that background up just because you think you can do whatever you want and you don't care what others say. There are many other cases where you can do something like that but it doesn't apply in this case. In fact if I were you, I would take that background down right now without telling her. It won't mean that you're giving power to that girl for agreeing with her or anything, but it's the right thing to do. Come on man, a girl giving a blowjob to a guy in puma shoes with skeet on her thigh? Where's the maturity level in that.

And look, if she so happens to text you out of nowhere saying that you took the background down and being all excited about it, you'll thank me because right now I know you're not very happy with the way the situation is going and you want her to become more open with you to get along so you can succeed. I mean come on now, that's why you came here asking for help. If she's like, "Oh you took it down because you just want me to date you." Just be cool about it and say, "Naw, I figured you were right because it was really immature and I'm not like that." THAT'S high value.

ooooooooh, I forgot to tell you that saying things like: "I wanna fuck you, but we're in a bar so that's not possible." You say it just like you would say stuff like: "Have you seen the new toy story 3 movie?", so it won't come off as creepy. It's just a normal statement.

I thought the background was funny... at first you're like, ah cool a Puma ad, and then you're like; wait wha-? oohh hahah.... I might remove it later if I get more shit out of it, but no one ever had any bad comments about it until her and I had it up since forever.

I get what you're saying though..... good info, you're helping me a lot

so... make it more about connecting than showing sexual interest.... hmmm...

I can tell you're more the romantic kinda guy, but even Cajun says he frames interactions sexually by saying shit like: "Wow, you're really cool, and even if I didn't want to fuck you I'd still want to hang out with you". What's your take on statements like this?

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An approach a day keeps the guru away.

Yeah that Cajun line isn't very bad at all actually; it's a lot more discrete and subtle as opposed to saying, "I wanted to fuck you." It would work very nice if said at the right time in the right setting and also depending on how the game has been going with the girl. Remember, framing anything sexually is a step by step process. I'm just trying to say that you have to have everything in the right spot before saying something like that so you don't fail with it so it doesn't come off as awkward or random. You can say something like that to prudes and conservative girls, but your game would have had to be longer/slightly different with them. Remember, the type of girl really matters with this PUA stuff. General PUA concepts apply to all girls, but specific actions and things to say that are PUA-like come from your head based on your experience and the type of girl you're working with.

I am more romantic but I used to be just like you and I would fail a lot of times because I just won't let myself see what I was saying and how I was acting from a girl's point of view.

How do I explain this...connecting is impossible to take to the max without kino and kino shows sexual interest in a way...but it's in an elegant manner. It's not the "I want to get into your pants right now" sort of thing. Connecting is more about the seriousness than the fun. It's more about the interesting things you do and share, the mystery, etc. Being fun only entertains the girl, it doesn't put her in that deeper sense of thinking about you as being in a relationship with you, know what I mean?

And there it goes again, you are still not thinking from that girl's point of view. You're still thinking that no one else said anything about that background but her. Ask yourself WHY it was her complaining about it. Was it because she saw you as a potential boyfriend inside? See, you don't know these things that go through a girl's mind and that's why it's risky doing things like that. It just so happens that maybe this girl had feelings for you and that background kind of made her think, "Wow...so much for the feelings I had for him." A real man knows what a girl wants and thinks because a real man thinks like a girl and acts like a man. You're still thinking like a man. And while that's helpful with technical projects and different aspects of life, it's not helpful with girls.