Hello everyone, i know this might sound like a shitty question but i just started wondering, if a girl is late to a date or just late meeting you sometimes this does not mean i often just stand and wait at a certain spot for hours, but she is just late when we say like lets meet at 19 o'clock then she writes to me like at 21 o'clock and says she is leaving her house now, so this is the question, should this bother me? or should i just keep my attitude not caring, because whenever she is late and stuff i often just do something else meanwhile so it doesnt really bother me, but do i have to show to her it bothers me or will it make her wanting me more when i dont care?


Thank you!

Personally, I would just say "I wont be able to meet you now, got to go do X".
A couple of min's can be due to traffic or something, 2 hours+ is just a joke! Have some respect for yourself.

However, thats only if it was planned "we will meet at the cinema at 1900" rather than "I will come to yours at about 1900". I would still however expect a text or call to say at about 1830 to say though.

If a girl makes you wait that long, it's a signal that she doesn't place much importance on your time. This may be because you didn't build that much of a connection when you first met, or because your invite was low value and boring.

If you're doing something time-sensitive then tell her if you have tickets or a reservation at that time (although I generally avoid fancy dinners or movies until I've actually fucked the girl).

Ways to make it matter less if she is late:
1. Tell her to come to your place for a minute first and then you'll head to wherever from there. This is doubly good because then she is comfortable in your house, meaning when you take her back later it's not a strange scary situation, but a familiar location.
2. Bring the paper or a book so that when she wanders in 30 minutes late you've just been reading anyway and didn't even notice or care that she was late.
3. Invite her out to something you and your friends are already going to anyway, so she can show up at any point and you won't have been sitting around by yourself.

In general, don't get pissy and whiny at a girl if she does something like be late, it's unattractive and pointless.

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30 mins is acceptable as long as theres a valid reasoin but after that i leave .

any longer than that and then she clearly isnt interested/doesnt prespect you so i usually send a text saying " 5 mins and im gone " or something to that effect. 9 times out of 10 shell phone begging you to stay whilst she apologises.

once she does turn up dont be pissy just smile and say dont worry about it and play your normal game.

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Seize the day

arrange something else, tell her that you have something else to do, she didnt care enough for the courtesy of a phone call

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life sucks and then you die! deal with it

k first i will say that i am an 'on time' person and hate being late and people who are late, it drives me nuts i think being late is superrude and inconsiderate

having sed that, in my experience, some people genuinely dont see lateness and timekeeping as important at all. like if you turned up two hours later, this girl may not even think it is an issue cos in her life being on time is no biggie either way and she is just totally relaxed about it.

perhaps when making arrangements to meet you could include her in the decision making process? eg will X o'clock be too early for you to be ready? we can meet later if that is better for you..what is a good time for you to make it? perhaps you are setting times that are difficult for her to make because she has other commitments or it takes her X number of hours to get ready after work etc (it does take girls longer to get ready than guys - we dont look this beautiful accidentally even if we would like you to believe otherwise)

i think when you say 'lets meet at x time,' you think that is a definite arrangement with a definite time attached, but in hear head she may hear 'lets meet up later this evening' ......to test this theory you could make a very specific arrangement where the time is very important, such as going to the cinema and meeting at 19:20. tell her you dont want to miss the beginning of the movie. be clear. if she is late, then she is either a person with terminally lateitis (ie she will never get better) in which case you will need to decide if you can live with that; or she doesnt care enuf about you to make the effort - in which case move on.


finally i dont think you should show it bothers you. remember : people do what works, so if she is always late and there are no negative consequences, she will continue to be late. i like the other suggestion of texting her '5 mins and i'm off';its not as if you dont have anything better to do with your time if you try all the above and she is still inconsiderate, then just dont wait, and she has got herself all ready for nothing....she will soon learn

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I have a simple solution for that. My thoughts are - you can tell me that you are late 10 hours if you want, but after 10 hours and 20 minutes I won't be there any more.

She also knows how much time you need to arrive at the meeting place, so she can give you a call that she is late if she wants even before you leave your home. Because she knows that she is going to be late at least an hour before you should meet, and if she doesn't it's one of two things - she thinks she can still make it, or she is showing disrespect to you.

If she tells you that she is late when you already arrived, or you are near, then wait for her for the time she told you. But not more than 20mins. Any traffic accident can be solved in that time.

If you arrive, and you don't see her, nor you receive her phone call, just LEAVE MAN! That's a sign that she doesn't respect you, and you don't need a girl like that. There's too much fish in the sea to cry for one...

If she calls you when she arrives in case that you already left, tell her the truth, that you were waiting, and since she wasn't there for 20mins, you had some other stuff to do (like scratching your but while watching tv - even that is better than waiting for a girl that doesn't respect your time).

If she cares, she will offer to re-arange meeting in which case you will say - Ok, I'll call you back to confirm. If she doesn't offer, than you saved yourself some time and some dignity... Cheers