Hello you guys, i need your advice on some stuff here, so here we go

My girlfriend tends to get mad everytime i cancel on her, which doesn't happen very often but tends to happen if i have some cool stuff to do so anyways she gets kinda mad and starts to act like she doesn't really care and stuff but everytime we have been together it is all fine, it is just kind of annoying that she gets like that so i need some advice on how to deal with this?

should i just be cool about it and don't compliment her unless she compliments me and just be like average without too much flirting ?

Thank you

- Hank

How about not cancelling on her.


Seriously, I would get mad too!

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

Agreed with Ezo,if u still feel the need to cancel,break up and find some chick that'll put up with ur cancelling....who knows,she might even return the favor.

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-TOAST

Generally speaking.

The OP is asking how to handle that his GF gets upset with him when he is being an idiot...

Handle it like a man!

You were wrong, now if you are any kind of man like creature, you admit it and apoligize. Not being strong enough to admit when you are wrong is really really weak!

You lose value man...

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I'm not trying to be a dick Ezo, but you're being a Pick Up Snob in my opinion.

bbardot: you just reminded me about porn

i am not cancelling like a total dick in the last minute it is like i had to do something else today i forgot then i told her, then she got kinda mad but didn't say anything or say anything rude just acting cold..

That is the definition of being a dick; learn to remember your shit and don't schedule dates which you know you wouldn't be able to make. This is completely your fault, she has a complete right to be mad at that since she probably planned her day accordingly....

dont cancel on her in the first place.

buuuuuuuuuttttt if its for another reason ( some mundane bull shit ) just diffuse the situation , dont shout back just stay calm, keep calm body language, smile and just talk about it but never raising your voice.

i just got out of a 12 month relationship in which time i never argued ( except for when she found out i cheated , that pissed her off hahaha ).

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Seize the day

Are you doing anything to make it up to her?

hi hank what i dont know if a lot of guys realise is the amount of effort most gf's put into pre-date preparation - they wont tell you this but all the deciding what to wear/shopping, getting hair done, nails etc etc can start like 2 days before the date easy, it takes me an hour just to blow dry my hair!, and, all this effort is essentially for you so that they look nice when they are out so when you cancel on us, it really can make us mad just cos its inconsiderate basically and you are saying essentially you dont respect her and she (or her feelings) are not important to you. perhaps you didnt even think maybe she cancelled her 'cool stuff' so that she could go on a date with you??

when she acts like she doesnt care, its not that she doesnt care, its that she doesnt want you to see that she is hurt, and she is pretending that she isnt even bothered that you wanted to do your 'cool stuff' rather than see her.

so think why are you annoyed with her?? isnt it good that she has some self respect? if you need to do some other stuff and need to cancel on her, then maybe dont leave it till the last minute would be better, or plan your time a bit better so you can still do your cool stuff and see her. what you are really saying to her when you do this is being with your gf isnt as good as the 'cool stuff' you are doing. its like you are saying 'if nothing else more fun comes along this weekend, i've always got my gf as a back up plan'

so...advice (not from a pro) how to deal with this; i dont think you should be 'cool' about it ..imho if you want to keep her you should simply apologise to her for messing her around and tell her you respect her. of course you should both do stuff with your mates and spend time apart from each other, but if you keep cancelling on her you either
a) wont have a gf anymore cos she will dump you for other more cool guys who appreciate her and make her feel like they put her first, or
b) she will stick around but end up resenting you but not leave you because she has no self esteem, and neither of you will end up happy in the end

i guess it depends how much you care about her basically and if you do, whether you want her to know it or not

I understand you are not demanding.

Well first of all try to prevent this. So you will skip trouble.

But if accidentally something like this happens then tell her you will make up and then keep your word.

Don't say too much. Especially when she is right to be upset.
Good luck