i posted this in the intro forum, but was suggested to post it here instead, so i'm copying pasting it here. Not so much a PUA question, but signing up mainly to get advice on if a 6-month relationship is salvageable or not.

i think i played most of the 6-months acting like i didnt care very much,with only showing occassional signs of emotional affection to her. Then she turned it around on me, and quit talking to me except through email. She is still on my facebook friends list, but has deleted all her tagged pics of me (she did all the pic taking & posting during the relationship) (so now it looks like i'm somewhat of a loner if someone looks at my page lol)

anyway, her main reason for the split was she said:

"when i realised we weren't really going anywhere is probably when i started backing off. i don't date someone simply for the sake of dating someone. i wont waste my time or yours. i feel like in the beginning i was way more into you than you were into me and that once i started backing off you got a little more serious like you didnt realise what you had until it was slipping away and then it was too late. im not willing to take a risk because i dont think we were really going anywhere. i cant turn my feelings back on."

further backstory, we knew each other as little kids, going back 15+ years ago, but didnt date until last year. I know her family.

also, i f**ked up pretty BAD and she knows about it, she knows about a f**k up with another chick.It happened just a day or two after we had kinda quit talking.

so anyway, ive probably communicated with her too much already, just in one email. Pretty much all I did was apologize for the f**k up and tell her i wish i hadnt and that i'd like to see her again.

she's refused to see me so far, but at least she sent the email above AFTER finding out about me and the other chick.

any tips are appreciated! i kind of fell for this girl, and would like to salvage the relationship if possible. If i can just get her to sit down and have a drink or dinner with me one more time that would be a good step but I get the feeling her friends have told her not to see me, and that she's afraid she might give in if she sees me in person (which is obviously what i want).

_________________
DBC

Look man. We all know that showing TOO much interest in a girl fucks things up.

BUT

Once you are IN a relationship... You are IN.. you have to be a damn good boyfriend as a PUA. I'm talking flowers, terrific compliments, and massages... You don't have to be super emotionally attatched, or clingy.. I'm not saying do all of these things all of the time.. But be spontaneous, and be fun.. If you're a real PUA. a girl would NEVER want to leave you. You would always be the one to walk away at your choosing.

But once you are in a relationship and EXCLUSIVE.. you can drop the I'm too busy, staying super distant, because that will immediately make ANY girl pull away.

And once she starts to pull away... the ONLY thing you can do, is directly talk about it to her... the WORST thing you can do... is start to cling....


and My friend, that is what you did.. You spent too much time trying to ACT disinterested that she got bored. and when she started to push you away, you started to cling to her.. send her texts.. and call her more.. and that works against you too...


Sorry boss.. NOT salvagable... The only thing you can do is to let it go. and let it go for good.. If she still has those feelings, then she will contact you.

_________________
As a PUA, you must leave the girl better off than when you found her