Alright, so here's my dilemma...

When I go out with my boys and I see a drop dead gorgeous girl that stirs up some feelings in me and that I'd like to get to know, I usually just end up with some eye contact and a smile and that's it....I hardly ever make the approach. The problem is I'm pretty sure that my friends are just staring at me the entire time and in doing so, cock blocking me in a way. There's just something that bugs the hell outta me when I'm walking up to a girl and talking to her, knowing my friends watching my every move and that when I'm done, no matter what the result, I'm gonna hear something from them.

On the other hand, the idea of sargin' alone isn't something I'd normally be inclined to do. I'm a pretty shy person (if you couldn't tell) to start off with. On top of that, I'm 6'3 nearly 6'4 so I stand out like a sore thumb. Blending in doesn't really happen for me. Plus, I always feel like my friends have my back in social scenes....even though, like I said, their presense kinda cock blocks me. I know it can be good to opperate outside your comfort zone from time to time, but I'm worried that I'll be SO uncomfortable that I won't be able to have fun and in turn get no where with anyone.

Does anyone have any advice or suggestions? Should I stay in more of my comfort zone so I know I'll have fun and have others be more reciptive to me? Or should I go with my a** hangin' out, praying I can get over being uneasy as hell so that I won't have to deal with my friends' sh*t?

"spotlight effect"


Truth is, nobody gives a fuck what you do.



Once you know where the mockery comes from once someone fails it becomes ridiculous not to fail.

PROTIP: Value.

Question: When you "go out with your boys", how many are we talking about?

It seems like pickup is designed so that wingmen usually need to be limited to one or two other people. If you go solo, that's cool if you can build enough social value all by yourself, but you admit that you're not at that point yet. More than two wingmen, and you end up with the "too many roosters in the henhouse" syndrome. Like Jav said, you need to work on being strong enough emotionally so that you don't care what other people think...and having a big group of friends around might be more of a crutch than an assist.

When you go out, only have one or two buddies to help with your social value, and make sure everyone is specifically working on PUA so that there are no issues.

@Jav
"Spotlight effect" huh? That actually makes perfect sense. I've always hated being on stage and stuff like that. I see your point with the rest too.

@Darkst0rm
I usually go out with two friends of mine. And I know that I have been using them as a crutch.....but I've been using that crutch to make sure I'm having a good time. It's worked in the sense that I get approched fairly often. Plus, my friends aren't involved in the pua lifestyle whatsoever (even though one of them does like to portray himself as a Casanova to us, but all we've ever seen is the "no va" part. In case you didn't know, "no va" means "no go" in Spanish.) So I haven't been trying to use them as wingmen. I make my approaches by myself. I've just had them there so I didn't look uncomfortable and out of place.

Thanks for the help guys