Hey guys,

I'm new to this forum, so let me give a quick introduction.
I'm zendelo, 19 years old from holland. I see myself as a pretty attractive guy, never realy experienced problems with getting girls.

I do however have problems with dealing girls I don't want. I find it hard to refuse girls even tough I know they are somewhat twisted in there mind. Wich i have to deal with afterwards.
I'm a big pussy breaking up or trying do ditch a girl, wich gives me alot of un nessecery stress.

Here is my problem;

Saturdaynight, I was going out with a few friends. When I noticed this girl hangin' with another friend I know.
So it was pretty easy for me to get her in the game, and i knew I was going to kiss her/ maby get laid tonight.
My brother told me, she is good looking but he knew she is a weird jealous girl who mindfucked her previous boyfriend by beeing weird and annoying, you know the drill weird acting psycho shit.
The end of the night I kissed her and I tought everything was fine I didn't gave her my number and I didn't want hers, because I tought we were on the same page doing this for fun only tonight.

Monday; went to work and I noticed that she added me on facebook & hyves (a dutch kinda facebook)
We chatted a little bit, and I ended up giving my number (HUGE MISTAKE).
So she went texting me;
'regrets of saturday?'

At that time I didn't inmideatly recognized that as a 'WARNING PSYCHO' text message and replied;

'No, but let's get together and get to know each other'

She asked when I had time and I said somewhere after working hours.

In wich she replied; 'then from now on we can chill everyday! and some dates she needed to play a sport '

So now after some text messages (wich all had a weird vibe), I ended up seeing her today. I know she is psycho and I know i made some big fucking mistakes and not noticeing these warnings.


Now I was planning on seeing her, not make any moves and if it gets uncomfortable that I'll tell her i'm not wanting any relationship with anyone.
Should I just be doing this? Or is there a better way?
This shit stresses me out.

If you have any questions or want to know what she texted and what i replied tell me, I can give it to you.

BTW I know that letting these girls stress me out in the first place is a HUGE mistake. But sometimes it just happens.

Hey Zendelo,

I'm new too and I noticed your post and I'm dealing with a similar situation. Since noone answered your posts, I wondered how everything worked out?
let me know bro
James

Well, James D, if I had seen his post earlier I would have told him that his plan of simply stepping back before things get intimate is probably the best way to go. Even though he'd be getting some mental pains because she'll probably bitch at him for a while, possibly talk some shit as well, but leave him alone in the end.

Mistakes like this are very healthy. Best way to learn when a girl is to 'psycho' to go for.

Good luck.

Best way to stop being a pussy about breakups is by doing them.

Not exactly the most respected skill, but definitely a very useful one.

I suggest getting out of there ASAP. I know too many people who try and help out the poor, psycho girls/guys and end up fucking themselves up.

I suppose it's not a breakup until you're in a relationship, but eject, cut all the strings, whatever.

The way of cutting loose is your choice.

_________________
Don't hate, just dominate.

Psycho girls/guys are the worst. make a clean break. Seriously-- just end it-- "We're not right for each other" or whatever. Then don't call or talk to her, don't respond to any of her texts. You don't need a psycho in your life. Nobdy deserves that, I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy.

My poor little brother had to deal with this a few years back. He broke it off with this girl after just a few months, but she made his life miserable for two years after that! Faked pregnancy, keyed car, popped tires, calls at midnight-- you name it.

Walk away... NO... RUN!!

_________________
Marie
I married my PUA!

It surprises me this old post is brought back to life, because for me this is old news now.

Anyway I'll tell you guys how everything worked out. She kinda is my girlfriend now.

I went on a date with her and I didn't make any move. The topic 'do you have a girlfriend' did came up and I told her I'm too much of a flirt to have a girlfriend and I'm not looking for one.
Afterwards she texted me; 'Did I do something wrong?'
I replied; No, I don't want to get you on the wrong foot.

I didn't get the impression that she was weird in her mind at that date. I did notice she was insecure about herself.
I believe now, that's the reason of her texts.

So I changed my mind, I tought let's give it a try and if it turns out to be a shit girl I'll just break up and get it over with.
So we meeted up for a few times, had sex.

Because I was so suspicious I viewed all of this very objective. Wich I now can't imagine otherwise. I analyzed everything she did, tought of her perspective and the perception of her & my texts.

I'm a pretty busy guy, I play in a band wich goes well, and I plan most of my weekends out, so I'm mostly gone for the whole weekend going places.
This of course I told her, so we don't meet up very often (not as much as she would want).
Now I'm fine with that, but it made me realize me a few things.

I always have control of the frame.
I'm always deciding if she will see me.
I have complete overview of our relation.
Basicly, I have complete control

So the only reason her previous bf got mindfucked, is because she was able to. She was able to control him.
She can't control me, so she is attracted to me. I don't take her BS, I call her out on her BS.

I noticed this attracts her even more to me, wich allows me to create distance again, wich will attracted her even more when I come back.
She knows I'm still not realy looking for a relationship, so nothing is official.
So note that she knows that i'm not scared of walking away. And that there are many other girls interested in me.

Now this is not a girl I'm going to marry, definatly not, but it's fun to try things out.
This relation made me realize so much things, I wrote 4 pages of notes, about relation maintaining and controlling, it's giving me so much ideas.

I do have a question; How does anyone ever, have girlfriends and not cheat on them? As soon as I'm away for 1 day and I meet another girl, I go for it, end up cheating. I feel this urge, I must do it, no matter how awesome my gf was.

I don't really understand,

You do like her, but you don't like her at the same time? Is she just a game to you, to try things out? Aren't you just wasting your time then? And couldn't it all be just rumours about her?

Maybe she isn't so bad afterall. I mean, from what I read in your posts she doesn't really do anything wrong, but maybe that's just my lack of information. People talk a lot I noticed and I've been the victim of these kinds of talks often enough to realize people are talking about everyone, turning everything into something huge while nothing was really going on. Most of the times the victims are insecure people, because they're easy to intimidate or to talk about, to keep the talk going, kniowing he/she won't do anything about it. I'm not making up excuses for this girl or anything, I'm just really interested. I'm also interested in the notes you said you made. Maybe you can post them?
And just to get this out straight, are you cheating on her or not?

It's like catching a butterfly. If you want to keep it then making a thight fist around it is a stupid idea since the butterfly will die.

Enjoy the time it's there,


and when it flies away you should catch another butterfly.

Like you said, you have control. trying to control a human being is only gonna make them run away from you.