Basic background- university student, although only a freshman, living in dorms.

There's this cute girl. It always is. She lives on my floor and although we've talked on occasions, I never really got interested. Until snow day, I made a snowman with a friend and she happened by, we struck up a conversation and made plans to hang out afterward. Went to play pool a couple days later and she was impressed at the amount of people I knew around campus (i.e. random person coming up to say hi or give me a high-five) and I asked her questions about herself. It seemed pretty enjoyable. I finally got the nerve to ask her on a date- a dinner and then went climbing trees around campus. I learned a lot more about her but I didn't feel as if it was safe to go in for the kiss so we said good bye at her door and I left. We still hung with each other because I was giving her and her roommate guitar lessons. Days later, she told me she was planning a movie night, in my room, and that I was invited. I figured, cool, I guess it'll be cuddle time. Instead, she got a couple of her girlfriends over and another guy (what??)... I felt pretty crap because I thought she definitely liked me and I was just keeping her on the hook but I still played it cool. The guy left right after the movies though so... I'm confused as what I should do next. Not sure if I'm stuck in the dreaded Friend Zone or I still have potential. Any advice would really help. Thanks.

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I'm here to learn.

Yes, women use movie nights as elaborate plans to mystify and stupify men. You probably missed it but I bet she offered the other guy one extra pop corn kernel signifying that your LJBF is a way to make his LJBF a DOI but of course the movie she chose is a better indicator of such things. Did she or did she not nod her head up and down and pop a few thumbs up while watching the movie? Did she ever blow her nose? Hmm. . . so many things going on here but can't really tell you anything without more details.


I agree with you that "keeping her on the hook" is a great way to tell others that you sat on your ass and did nothing in fear but I'm curious . . . How do you know you played it "cool"? Did you do the "Fonz" thumbs up? Did you flip your collar up? Did you put your thumbs in your pockets, nod your head and hum a tune? Were your friends impressed with your non-action enough to tell you, "Ooh . . . you're cool!"? Or do you just tell her, "Heeeey . . . I'm playin' it coooool . . . "

Most of us at PUAF are pretty good with the "sit on the ass and do nothing game". I'd appreciate it if you could share with us your version of "Playin' it cooool . . ."

I'm still confused to what you're meaning by the let's just be friends part about my LJBF and his LJBF and DOI? And it was Inglorious Bastards and she was squirmish throughout it. This girl is used to guys hitting on her so I figured I'd be different and not do that. I pretty much ignored her for the whole movie unless she made the point of talking to me.

I meant by playing it cool that I was chilled. Didn't make myself seem wound up about her guy friend. I was cocky funny and got IOI's from the rest of her friends. But as always, the challenge of getting that hard prize is what lures you in.

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I'm here to learn.

Forget her and go after her friends!!! Problem solved!!! You should have made a move earlier...