so HB 9 ive been working with for about a month i see her every other day of the weekdays, i try to get her to hang out with me this weekend telling her "were hanging out" and shit, she flakes. so the next week neg her tell her i had alot of fun and met her twin all this shit, then i said something about her character was cute in a little text, and i get "awh gee i love you fender43:)". what the fuck is this IOD IOI and what the hell do i respond with this is urgent help me out guys.

Not quite sure i get it...


But.. Ignore it, cut the thread.

It sounds to me like you're heading toward the friendzone. A girl normally won't throw out an "I love you" unless you guys are dating and she actually is starting to love you, or if she means it in the "as a friend" type way. I think your case might be the latter.

Pull a Hon Solo and just reply "i know"

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Every Saint has a Past, Every Sinner has a Future

She's playing with you my friend. She's one of those girls who enjoys the attention guys like you give her so she sticks around just enough for you to stroke her ego and at the same time she has no serious intentions with you.

Basicially with her "I love you" comment she is babying you, as if to say, "awww, that's so cute".

In this situation you need to give her an ultimatum. What I would recommend is sending her a text saying, "Look, enough horsing around. I'm just going to shoot straight with you. The truth is, I kind of like you. The questions is: can you deal with that? When you can answer that question without making a joke about it I'll get back to you again."

Then you freeze her ass out until she deals with your feelings and question seriously.

When you freeze her out she's going to start missing all that kissing up you did with her that stroked her ego. It's going to cause a lot of internal conflict with her and she's going to eventually realize that unless she deals with you seriously she's not going to get the attention she wants.

OR

She's is not going to give a shit and will choose not to confront your feelings seriously. In which cause you called her bluff. At least you'll know what her true colors were and you can move on.

I think you are taking this a little bit too seriously. Girls throw around "I love you" these days like it doesn't mean anything, when really it still means something, its meaning has just changed. It doesn't mean "I am committed to you for the rest of my life" anymore, it basically means either "Aw, you're cute", "I think I love you but I'm not sure..." or the first one in rare cases.

Anyway, if she texted you "Awee I love you fender43" it seems like a little playful friend thing to do. As someone else mentioned, you could be in the friend zone. I wouldn't go that far, but she basically sees you as "just a cute guy", cute being more condescending than having to do with attraction.

What I would do is treat her the same way. Don't go too far, but treat her a little bit more naive than she actually is, kind of brush her off like you would a child. If she wants your attention, don't give it to her immediately, make her wait just a little bit longer because you have "big boy" things to do. Don't say that, and don't overdo this, it is just a suggestion to spark more attraction in her and make her realize that she can't walk all over you.

This also shows me that you may not be using push / pull as much as you should perhaps. Try it out, try pulling out early, among other push/pull techniques.

Maybe I'm overthinking this too, but I believe this'll work. Give it a shot.

Good luck man!

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-Sharplin
My journal:
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don't over think it, just be honest