So I don't consider myself to much of an AFC but I could be. I know your not suppose to be stuck on one girl but there is this one girl I want. So I'm now asking the group out there for help.

I first started as an acquaintance of this girls in February of 2009. We knew about each other but no talk or contact. Sometime around October, I saw that she wrote on a mutual friend's Facebook profile and I decided to make a little contact like we should chill or see each other during our first Alumni Weekend. She said sure and messaged me her number on Facebook.

The entire weekend we didn't see each other except for a brief second when I was going to a bar and she was leaving because the bar was closing.

The next day, I text her saying she owes me a date. She laughs and says, "I owe you a date?" I said, "Fine, I'll take you out on a date instead." She agrees. We don't go on this date until December because I am away at graduate school 3.5 hours away and she lives at home working.

So we go on a date, I freeze up. I know, I'm a puss bag. She invites me to sleep over and we're in bed and I don't do shit. Biggest regret of my life. Next morning we go to breakfast and I say, I'll see you later tonight because we had a mutual friends birthday party at a club to go to.

So we got closer over this break but more of a friendship thing. I want this to stop. I want to make her mine. But the problem is now she's dating some other guy which she apparently likes. I said to her that I care for her and I can't do this friendship thing. We've been having subtle fights because of this situation. Now, I need advice. She knows I like her but she's dating someone else and I'm now a friend.

Any techniques?

honestly man i feel for you, i was in the same situation before, i just didnt get as far as you did ( bed wise). i lost that war. ... idid notice during my failure , that the less attention i gave her the more affectionate she became towards me, even though she was hooking up with other guys right in my face. i wish i could tell you exactly what to do ... what i didnt do was tell ehr how i felt, she already knows how you feel but tis different coming from you. sometimes when you let it all out, you feel emotionally cured, you maynot freeze up, becasue she knows you, and you have nothing esle to fear. others might say thats a bad idea, alphas dont give off thier feelings and shit. you can be alpha and not ay her much atention, get her thinking what your going to do next, but then you run the risk of her forgetting you and being happy with the other guy ....the red pill or the blue pill?

Cut off contact and hope she misses you. Then the ball is in your court.

When my ex and me broke up, I cut her off like no tomorrow. She broke down after a while, but I was too clingy and I ruined it. Biggest regret of MY life, I still love that girl.

But if you keep being her friend, that's all you'll ever be. Tell her you care and want to be with her, not be just friends. If she feels the same, she will react accordingly.

If not, then there is a million other girls who live near you that have every single damn quality you like about this girl, and probably better too.

_________________
Recovering AFC as of 4 months ago
Me: http://i49.tinypic.com/2zyiqzp.jpg
(Pic taken for lifting progress)

Excellent advice from ThomasX and desertEagle.

To summarize (plagarize?) them: You can either let her go and hope she gravitates back, or you could lay it all on the line and deal with it all upfront.

The way I would judge what to do would be how needy you have come off. If you have been calling her, begging her, etc. for a while, you're not going to get anywhere with the "lay it on the line" strategy. On the other hand, if you have been withdrawing or avoiding her, you might not want to try the "let her go" strategy.

The question is, what position are you in right now? Which way would be more effective in this situation? You see this situation the best: think about your answer...

_________________
-The good can never be measured, but the great can never be controlled-

Thanks guys. I appreciate the help. I really do and you guys have great advice. Right now, she knows the whole situation and I've brought up possibly not talking anymore but she told me to think about it and right now we're still talking everyday. Texting and the phone calls. My plan right now is to do this.

We originally had planned to see each other for Valentine's Day because I asked her to be my date. She said sure but she said it thinking I wasn't serious. Now, she might see this dude instead of me.

But no matter the case, she still wants to see me and I want to see her. I don't know if it's going to be in a club situation or a one on one situation since Friday is my birthday and that seems to be the day that she wants to see me instead.

So whatever the case, I plan on kissing her no matter what and letting her know that I want her to be to me. If she doesn't give end, I plan on ending it, telling her something like, "It hurts too much to see you with him so we can't talk anymore and try to make her a little upset."

I want to know what you guys think of that idea?

that end line was pretty good, guilt is awsome jks. ...happy birthday by the way..remember, its your bday, its about you, the one day its all about you... so let her give you the atention, even if she does or doesnt, let her know what you have to say, my mistake was not ending it, even though i had planned on it, i pussied out