There's this girl from work that I think is attractive based on looks, and face value. She's going to school and supports herself, and has a smokin hot body.

She's 24, I'm 22 (not a limiting belief, I'm further ahead academically, financially and at work, as well as support myself)

Usually I can say stuff to get some sort of reaction at out people, I patronize people a lot unintentionally, or that's what they tell me. When I tease her like I would tease any other girl she ignores me, and gives me no reaction at all.

Say she comes into work hungover, I say something like "hey there champ, it's never too late to start going to AA with a smile completely joking" She doesn't respond or anything.

So I don't say anything to her, a few days go by and she acts like she never ignored me, and ask me how school is going blah blah small talk.

I went to work party and she had a little break down and came to me and just started crying. I said "I don't know what you want me to do" I gave her a hug, and a pat on the back and I had 3 other girls yelling at me, so I left her.

We were briefly discussing how she thinks vitamin c helps get rid of a cold faster, I told her this was not proven by the fda, it's more of a myth. She didn't believe me so I bet her dinner. I was right and she text me later that night. I asked her what she thinks of an afternoon play in the park, followed by a picnic. She said that sounds amazing.

I asked if she'd like to join me the following day, she ignored me, but we split dinner the following night because of our bet, more small talk.

She asked me sometime ago "do you still like me" I immediately said no, without even thinking and just left it at that since I had no intentions of pursuing anything with her.

Well fast forward to this week, I've been seeing some girls, but physically they do not compare with the girl from work, I'm ready to have a girlfriend, and if I'm going to have a gf she's gotta be smokin and smart.

And suddenly girl from work has put some effort into starting conversation with me, and picking up my slack and helping me without a word, just a smile. I tell her she's earning points with me, but I'm worried about her motives.

She goes to the bar every night and gets hammered, lets guys buy her drinks all night, tease them but never goes home with them, she's a local celebrity at this one bar, and that's her escape from reality. Co-workers tell me I need to go to the bar with her and get close with her friends before she'll date me. Well I also work with her friends and I've been super nice to her friends lately and she's being nicer to me.

The only thing is she's a smoker. Weed and cigarettes, eats like shit, and doesn't exercise, but some how she's 5'7 115 34dd

How do i escalate this into a romantic relationship?

Not worried about losing my job, I have another offer right now, but this one currently pays more.

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If her lifestyle is a total 180 to yours, I would rethink about having a LTR with her. She also sounds very insecure. In my experience those are some of the worst girls to get into a relationship with.

But if still want to pursue her, don't try to date her until you are no longer working at the same place... You don't sh*t where you eat. That can have all kinds of problems later if things don't work out between you two.

Best,

J-Dub

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J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

It sounds like you need to calibrate.

We work under the assumption that girls are prepared to fight. That they are master players themselves and that they have a huge ego that we have to break down.

What, if, this, is, wrong...

You got yourself a cynical, depressed girl with no selfconfidence that lives off other peoples validation like a fly on shit. Reminds me on how we all started. Maybe you cannot game her the way you are used to. She seems sad, maybe she just dont want to play. Sometimes it is ok to treat another human being just like that, like a human being. What are her needs? How can you gain her trust? Not by playing games anyway...

Think about that.

Ezo

we hung out tonight at another co workers house tonight, she immediately greeted me with a hey!!

our co worker makes food, and she (the one I'm interested in) goes into the kitchen and gets me a plate of food while I'm still sitting there

Now I'm wondering what if she's just polite and really has no other motives. I need some way to test if she's interested.

Like she sat on the same couch as me when there were other seats available. Little things, and maybe she just a nice girl.

Question:
Is there some sort of test to see if a girl is just nice, or if she's interested?

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Dude, all of those things she did are IOIs... You should be hitting on that.

Best,

J-Dub

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J-Dub in DC

Its better to be the predator than the prey.

You need to be a good player if your gonna be successful at the game.

went to a work party tonight, and she made it a point to come and sit next to me and talk with me for awhile.

A buddy of mine said it looked like she wanted to talk to me more but there was something more holding her back.

She's a really nice girl and have a good feeling about this

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She is interested, but is holding back as I bet she has daemons inside of her. As Exo pointed out this girl is a emotional wreck. It is your choice if you want to be with her or not. But do think about being with such a girl tho.

from the sounds of things she is intertseted. but i cant even tell you are by the things your saying. shes probably cant either. now im not saying go tell her or anything... that would be afc... but u should make a point of being aware of the small things u are doing (like u are of her sitting on the same couch as u etc) and start with them. give her some ioi's and see how she reacts, turn this into compliments, then soi's and then your penis hahaha
keep pimpin

Tonight at work I asked if she wanted to hangout after with a couple other people from work.

She said she was pretty tired and just going to lay low, I said that's fine, if she changes her mind to call me.

I think that's showing some interest, I'd like to ask her out on an exclusive date but I'm thinking she's not ready for that.

It's weird though. I've gotten into the mind set of thinking "how would I act differently if she was my girlfriend"

And just little things I do, like I make my bed everyday, and keep the bathroom clean, and shave daily, and just take better care of myself, and the house. I'm more helpful and treat others better, and have become more fun.

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I text'ed her yesterday when i was in a class that we are both taking, just at different schools and sent her something like "is there any other classes under this category that will fill this requirement, this class is boring me to tears already"

she replied "lol don't think so"

I was at work and she wasn't there, so in the middle of my shift I sent her a text "i keep getting in trouble without you to pick up my slack "

she replied instantly ( I say instantly because when we were hanging out she just let her phone ring in her purse and didn't seem to care) with "lol uh oh!"

And the previous posters are right, I don't think she wants to play. She said one day a few months ago about how much she liked my car, I get this a lot so without even thinking I always say "you should see the backseat" Every other girl laughs, more flirting and bantering. She just said "oh uhh umm no"

I know she gets hit on all the time, and a lot of guys just want to get in her pants, so I'm trying to build trust and comfort. I'm going to look into the other job offer I have and might put in my 2 weeks to pursue something with her. Who knows! I have class in 6 hours time to sleep!

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Went over to the co workers house again tonight, she was there came downstairs to meet me.

I cooked for them, and there was 3 other people there. We played a game, I accidentally negged her. I gots to be careful she's sensitive.

I rubbed her back a little tonight, she didn't seem to mind, and we sat on the couch again together.

How do I progress into a more romantic relationship?

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god damnit..we went out last night, just the two of us to a bar, and met at the mall before that, I thought things were going well, and I had made some serious progress.

I thought this girl was different than every single other girl, and more mature. I couldn't have been more wrong.

First thing we talked about was her past relationship, she just started talking about it and she was so glad I went out with her. She said how her last boyfriend was an asshole but she kept going back to him, so I said sounds like you had an abusive childhood, and then she told me about that.

she goes to the bathroom and I grab a bite to eat at the bar, she comes over and tells me she ran into some guy she hooked up with, then she told me she wanted to hook up with the manager from work, and how she went out with him, then she told me how many times she's hooked up with out guys in the past year, and then she asked me how big my cock was!

I did make one mistake though, she asked if I had a crush on her, and I said" yes, but don't know why"

She then put me in the friendzone, and said she likes hanging out with me and I'm really cool and blah blah blah.

I tired to treat her like a human-being and tried my hardest to respect her, when she didn't want the respect nor deserved it.

I ended up getting kicked out when I got way too drunk-she kept buying me drinks, I ran into another girl from work that said something to piss me off, and I lightly slapped her on the face, she made a huge fuss, I passed out in my car, puked all over myself, and pissed my pants and walked 4 miles home in the rain.

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Lol I don't mean to laugh at all, but the end of your post was really not expected. Due to her complete lack of social awareness (examples would be she ignores you and doesnt realize it, and how she so openly talks about how dirty she is in terms of partners) I think she may have ausbergers syndrome or autism. (No offense to anyone who suffers from these -- I just am well versed in psychology and this girl is displaying some major symptoms).

There's one thing I learned. The more you're an ass hole, the more girls want you. I used to be a nice guy and got nothing. Then I started being an ass hole and had 30 girls wanting to date at a time. Unfortunately, after dating a few of them for a year or longer, I am back to being a nice guy again and need help.

But you should treat her like the piece of trash she is, and then try to hook up if you want to. This girl is strictly an object. Sounds like a slutty airhead

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youre right the whole asshole things works flawlessly, but I want a girl I actually like and can be nice to at times.

Right now I have a few hook up buddies, I treat them like utter shit, they come over I jizz I tell them they have to leave, no hug, no kiss just cya later. Yet they keep coming back, and it disgusts me, when I would like to be able to fuck a girl, appreciate her company and take her out once in awhile.

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This girl is in the game! yep you got a player on your hands, which in many cases can be a good thing, but in the relationship arena its not going to happen.

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