Hey guys, I need some help with this situation. I work at a cafe that has lots of women. I feel that sustaining a conversation with anyone (easier with guys) is really hard for me especially when it leads to silence. Then I become frustrated how hard conversation becomes for me. What I want to learn is to become comfortable and confident around female co-workers and the hot female customers.

More importantly, I want to develop conversing with female co-workers with ease rather than give off an image as a hardworker who doesn't speak often. I want to become a fun employee around people - women especially.

Another thing I have noticed, there is this guy at work who gets along well with good looking co-workers, whenever he's around them, they smile when he smiles, and they talk to him when he talks. It frustrates me that he can do these things so naturally. He's not a bad guy either, but I envy him.

So, what could I try? Is it simply just more practice? Please steer me in the right direction. Thanks

Conversation doesn't have to do with just speaking. In my experience it is far more important to listen when conversing with someone. I mean really listen. If you pay close attention to what people say, you can certainly find a way to make the conversation flow naturally. Ask some questions, and then once they get talking, move on from there. For example, it could be as simple as...

"What did you do this weekend?" To which they respond
"I went skiing/clubbing/whatever"

Then you can talk about that for a bit, ask them, how long have they done whatever it is they did, how did they get into it, what is it about it they like. Which should naturally lead to something else. If they got into it because they took a trip somewhere, then you can start talking about travel.

The key is to listen to people and pick up on something that you want to focus the conversation on, but then get them talking about!

Hope this helps, check out the rest of the forum for some advice, but just remember, if you try too hard your going to get messed up. Just relax, be yourself, and let it come naturally.

P.S. Many people are uncomfortable with silence for no really good reason. If there is nothing to be said, you are better off not talking. If there is silence don't feel obligated to fill the space. Just go about what your doing. If your with a girl and she breaks the silence, reward her by engaging her in conversation.

I feel your pain Supaari(lol),I was once there.

I used to work in a major-clothing store with the staff of like 99% females-from management to cashiers.But there was this 1 fucking guy who had it going on-super confident.Remind you,I had already been studying PU for years at that time but I was a bit anti-social.

This' how I got over that-humor!Tats it.Joke around with them.Fuck talking about their weekends.Just joke with them.Confidence will come along when you're able to be funny with them.

You're working at a coffee shop:be that fun guy.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM

Consider this situation, what would you suggest you would do when you ask
"What did you do this weekend?"
Thier response: "Oh, nothing much"

This happens a lot. Is there anything to add to that? Could you still carry on from there? Or does the conversation end?

Please listen Supaari. That's why I don't advocate asking anyone(fellow-employee,customers,etc.)anything about how was their weekends as an opener!! It sucks and it's cheesy.It seeems like a beggar's opener as known in the pick-up community.

This' what you should do.Say something interesting!!That's fucking it-then go on to ask of weekend secondly then give your input.

You:Hey Jerry(customer or co-worker),did you know that 70% of girls have more tattoos than men[it doesn't have to be a true thread]?

Jerry(or anyone)Oh,really?

You:Yea,I was reading ... and it said...I went to a bar weeken and I really noticed that more girls had tatts.Anyway,how was your weekend?

That's how you do it.Not ask a question first.State an interesting fact or observation.Build on that by stating what you did on the weekend then ask about their weekends.

_________________
Most active PUA blog in the community since 2009.
https://kennyspuathoughts.wordpress.com ... arly-2022/

Now active on YT again with PUA, Red Pill, Manosphere content:
https://youtu.be/tj5rnL_qKfM