Met an emo girl in a club. Tattoos, piercings, real sexy and from meeting it was purely sexual. So she came to mine in the daytime last week and we ended up getting all of our clothes off, except for some reason she wanted to keep her bra on.
So she was pretty much on my dick form walking in the door and we did eveything but bang. First date so im thinking thats fine.

She came around last night and we watched a movie. Once again we started taking clothes off, doing oral and then when i reached for a condom she pushed me away. Still wouldnt take her bra off, i'm thinking she is insecure about her breasts, which are pretty big, so may be scarring

This was fucking annoying so i went straight for the freeze out. From this we didnt do anything again, even after going to bed ( we were previously in the living room )

Date 3 coming up ( if i want it ), i need to make sure we fuck or its going o get wierd. Anyone had this before?

iv never really had that exact situation before, but there are a few things you can do:

go on a date or wutever, and dont do anything sexual. just build comfort more and just do something to have fun not based on game to much, just for the sake of getting to no her and so she can get to know you first. this might help for later so she feels like you guuys connected and that you arnt just fucking

if that doesnt work


get her arrosed. i mean like you need to work some magic pretty much. let her to things to you, but make sure your do more to her. push pull a little aswell, but mostly get her really horny and see if working on her more will get you some were. if she still says no or doesnt want to, simple just be honest on what your intentions are (wutever they may be: ex-i love to have fun and i want you to have fun to and if you arnt with me then maybe we should see each other) thats an example you can say anyhting similar to that im typing fast ha. but after that just ask her what her intentions are too

no need to push it so she regrets sleeping with you, this can easily turn into a MLTR

mR.e

_________________
dont even think just do it!

Oh dear you poor guy.

I'll give you a woman's perpective. This girl just doesn't feel comfortable with you. Period.

" i need to make sure we fuck"

Whooaaa!!! Back off man!! This sentence gives me an idea with what's wrong.
You are making things worse becuase you're coming on to her whheyyy too strong and scaring her away. You obviously want to have sex really badly, but you might be coming across as a bit sexually desperate which is a turn off. She feels pressured by you and isn't ready.

I had this situation a while back with a close male friend. He was charming, and was so good he just set me on fire. Sex I'm sure would have been great, and I would have been happy just to be fuck buddies, but it wouldn't work. This guy had major issues, mental and emotional. He was really sexually fustrated and that fact that he was so desperate was a massive turn off. I let him do everything but have sex with me - we even went to Paris together. He was great, but sex was a no-go becuase I never felt truly comfortable with him becuase of his behaviour. In the end the same touch that set me on fire eventually turned me cold, and then felt he was just groping me.

I think this lady has some self-esteem issues with her body that need to be fixed. Does she let you stroke her boobs? You need to sit her down, in a relaxed way, and just ask her what's wrong.

Basically you need to back off in a big way, as I think you're going too fast. Do you want her as a girl friend or just to fuck? If you want her just for a fuck then drop her - otherwise it's a waste of your time and you might end up hurting her more. If you are willing to invest some time with her then great, but these things take time.

Ok firstly, WTF are you doing on these forums? You clearly don't understand the basic principles of what we call game and are more interested in being derogatory about men.

For the sake of this discussion i need to let you know that i have slept with 3 other women this week , and i am in no way desperate for the act of sex, i just want to have sex as fast as possible with this person so that sex stops becoming an issue and we can enjoy a healthy relationship, in whatever context that may be.

To give you an example, when she came around the first and last time, she immediately started kissing me and grabbing my crotch. I didnt dive in, i gradually built up the sexual tension. This time, after we had watched the film she took my trousers off and then her clothes until we were both naked apart from her top, we then proceeded to have oral sex for around 20 mins.
There is no point in this that i was sexually needy or desperate, but from my experience, for any girl going this far, sex is the next natural step.

To do this twice is wierd and im not going to sugar coat this for anyone. I want to find the best way of getting in her pants, the best way of fucking her as fast as possible. Not the best way of finding out what she wants, how she feels about our relationship, i simply want the best way to fuck her the next time i see her. Once that has happened we can both move forward.

So if anyone has been in this situation before and passed through it, please let me know.

Calm down. She was trying to help in a constructive manner. Listen to what she says and try to answer in an open manner. The fact is that sex is all your after and thats what she probably sensing that and insecure about the way things are going

Oh Snapped

Actually . . .

You kids ought to read this OVER, OVER, and OVER again. What are the woman's desires? What are her fears? What the hell is going on with female*artist's fucking "blah, blah, blah's" above? You figure this out(NOT in the way she thinks you need to figure this out) and you will get laid over, over, and over again.

But you react like a 15 year old little girl and you're already on the wrong path. This is a great opportunity to view the mind of an insecure little chick but why the hell are you turning yourself into an "insecure little chick"?(You are demonstrating why YOU DON'T GET LAID)

Use this opportunity. Study your target. Study yourself.

Yeah, right, where to start.

The female formerly known as female*artist has a point.

I welcome her perspective. Just because she is not set in her ways of thinking like a PUA it doesnt mean that her opinion is not important.

You guys need to speak "girl" if you wanna understand girls. Really what princess here is trying to say should be obvious to all of you. It is most definately pickup! Do you want me to translate it for you?

I need to make sure we fuck! ... Shows neediness, you put pressure on her. What you wanna show is. Sure we can have sex, I would love to but if you think that it is going too fast, lets just wait.

She tells you to back off! Yes, that would be the freeze out, the LMR!

She has uncertainties about her body! Damn straight! You guys need to understand that this is an issue! This is real! Girls communicate with emotions and feeling. Like 99% of them are fears!

She doesnt feel comfortable with you! You would do well to listen to her! Ask yourself why that is. Could it be that you are too needy that she does not know what your intentions are. Or even worse, that she knows exactly what your attentions are!


Guys we are all trying to help you out here but this is no way to treat a new member!


Female*artist. On behalf of all the green PUAs that are not prepared to broaden their minds enough to take in a fresh perspective into their well organized world of how the textbook PU should work. I sincerely apologize.

No offense to any of you here!

Ezo

I also welcome the female perspective - listen to the women, this stuff is gold dust


Just tell her that "were not having sex and need to take things slow" and mean it. People want what they can't have.

or maybe try talking honestly about it with her, open up and trust her. hopefully she will trust you too. You don't know what's going on with her; find out.

Granted. The male PUAs on the forum can probably give better advice on technicalities and actual sarging in field. For the simple reason that we have years of experience first hand. We understand (and feel) the pain!

However fPUAs can teach you a lot! You need to study both sides to get the full picture!

Ezo

I welcome any advice ,especially female and have talked about this with several women that i know. For some issues you need to be inside a womans head, i agree.

Femalepua's advice may have been good but the tone of it ( "Oh dear you poor guy" ) was fairly condescending and seemed more interested in man bashing than giving constructive feedback. What it does show however, is that any woman including herself is put off by the idea of a guy simply trying to get into their pants.

Last time i was with a girl who had LMR, i was in bed and she turned over and started going to sleep. As that happened a girl rang me for about 20 mins ( phone girl was drunk ) and as soon as i had put the phone down, the girl next to me had her top off and was grinding on me. We then had sex.

So it isn't always about talking through the situation or making sure you are both comfortable, sometimes jealousy / scarcity can trigger off sex just as easily.

Have u tried the LMR technique often discussed on these forums? You go so far and she stops then u just stop everything and turn away. She misses the attention and tries to get you back. If she ends up stopping at a certain stage again you do so again. Rinse and repeat

Yea bro, did that twice last time, it seemed to slow things down even further.

This is my point - she can probably sense this. People are complicated but I'm guessing the reason why see will do oral and not full sex yet is that she just doesn't feel ready.

The fact that she grabbed your crotch and started kissing you means nothing - and it's all to do with the roles men and women take when they have sex. This can carry on for weeks, even months and you still might not get anywhere.

Men and women exchange roles sometimes in sex - one will fill the dominant, active role, and the other will fill the submissive passive role. Everone's different, but for some things I think certain truths apply -

By grabbing your crotch and taking your clothes off she is taking your role - the masculine, dominant, active role that doesn't really require any trust. She is doing something TO YOU.

Sex for most men is like this, - you are doing something to somebody else - in this case you are entering someone's body.

However sex for women is often the submisive role - she is letting you into her, she is permiting you to do things to her. Taking this role makes a woman vunerable emotionally and physically and involves an incredible amount of trust that many men take for granted.

For the sake of basic self-preservation that makes women to be a bit more selective and it's obviosuly getting over those basic barriers that's the problem. If she has let you give her oral sex then it might be a good sign - she is taking the vunerable submissive role. If she hasn't then she is still taking the dominant masculine role - in other words doing stuff to you helps her feel in control and doesn't involve that element of trust that would come with you doing stuff to her. It might be why she won't take her bra off - by letting you touch her there she would be starting to take the submissive role which wouldn't be ready for.

That's why I said that the crotch grabbing and kissing is meaningless. She needs to start showing signs of taking the submissive role - otherwise you might be acting this game out for months (trust me, I've done this to someone before and it drove him totally crazy).

Sorry -my words might be too flowery for some, but I can't describe it another way.


Why don't you let her go? After all you did say that you weren't sexually desperate and it sounds like you have no trouble filling your bed. There are plenty more besides her and it sounds like you might get yourself in a bad situation if you carry on with her. You seem to have no real emotional attatchment to her and there's bound to be more like her out there - no big deal and you'll save yourself some time. I can't offer an opinion based on the techniques that you guys follow, but I can offer an opinion based on my observations.

So in a wider context, and I'm aware that I might be going off topic here -

Getting involved with women who want more than just fucking is too much hassle anyway - seriosuly. The most charming men I knew, the ones who always got women were the ones who made no secret of how they like women. They might have just wanted sex and that's all (and nothing wrong with that), but it was their attitude that set them apart. Their attitude towards it made them attractive they clearly liked sex but they made a point of surrounding themselves with women.

One guy I knew had a lot of female friends - he was certainly not the caveman type. He knew when to restrain himself and so gained the respect of the women around him - and knew to stay away from women who were needy, or wanted to start relationships.

Guess what his profession was? He was a sculpter who did body casting (google bodycasting and see the pics!). He got to see and touch hundreds of women's naked bodies whilst casting them, but always restrained himself becuase he had a repuation to maintain. Casting is a long and boring process, but in that time spent waiting for the plaster to dry he got to know, respect and entertain the women around him - result? A lot of women wanted to sleep with him, despite knowing it would just be sex.

As I'm sure some people would agree - word gets around women FAST. If a guy is known to be what we call in Great Britain a 'man whore', then word travels fast. Bascially this doesn't mean that he sleeps with lots of women - again I have said there's nothing wrong with that. What this means is that he is pushy or sleezy when he's chasing them. He doesn't consider the consequences of sleeping with a woman who is showing signs of wanting an emotional attachment. Reputation goes far - if you are known for being good in bed and are known to shown respect word will spread fast anyway, so I would let go of this woman before things get too complicated and you end up hurting her, and wasting your own time.


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hey i have a problem, ive been hooking up with this girl who is really into her religion,twice in the past month. we have always gone back to my place after a party and hooked up. the first time i just made out with her in my bed and we dried humped all night. i didnt feel like she wanted to go any further then that so i resisted the urged to be aggressive. the next meeting we came to my house and we got started doing alot of 4 play, we came so close to having sex that i actually broke the passion when i said i wanted to get a condom, im pretty sure that i could had sex with her if i didnt asked,but fuck it i wanted to be safe for her and me. the reason i said she is really into her religion cause i believe she is a born again virgin,whatever the fuck that means, but my problem is i haven't called her to ask her out on a date or something like that, and i dont really know where to go from here, i think so far its going well but im kinda confused at this point....NEED HELP!