So, ever since I got back from my trip to Canada few years ago, my mind has gone to shit, along with my self discipline and confidence.

Basically, I was into pick up for awhile and had a lot of success picking up girls and I felt like I was in a pretty good place. *you can check out some of my field reports*

But Now. Year and a half later. My eating habits and work out habits have gone to SHIT. And I have pretty much gained probably around 60lbs. I'm the fattest I've ever been in my entire life. And I hate myself for it.

Worst part is, I work at a gym. Surrounded by hot customers and employees and it's killing me inside along with my confidence and game.

So, basically I have become a very introverted, low energy, un-confident chump and I need some help to get me back up on my feet. Just reading some of other peoples post is motivating and inspiring and I look at this more than just being able to pick up girls or being confident.

This is more about making yourself a better person and living life to the fullest, without fear.

I have come to you, my brothers, for support.

-brandonjg

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I like vagina.

I know how you feel my man. My first 3 months in the community, I gained 10 lbs. I'm a super health nut, and that was unacceptable so I went back on a regimented diet and exercise program for myself.

Honestly, if I were you, I'd find things that you enjoy doing that are outside. Ride your bike, skateboard, hike, walk, play basketball, football, baseball, any kind of ball! Make friends with some folks that are outside all the time and hardly know what the hell a computer is.

I grew up a fat kid. When I moved to California when I was 17, I fell in with the skaters and snowboarders. I completely neglected technology (got rid of my tv too). I eventually got a job at a Ski Resort and started snowboarding 7 hrs. a day (Park crew means you get to ride and get paid!). I picked up trail running because it was a reason to go to the mountain when there was no snow on it in the summer months.

My man, I feel that to live healthy, you need to surround yourself with healthy places, people, and things. The bar (while we go 4 nights a week to sarge) is not a healthy place. Its tolerable because you know what your there for.

Personally, I feel that your mental state is a reflection of the conditions that are besetting your life and your contentedness with those conditions. If your not happy with your body, your probably not going to be reflecting a large amount of confidence (some people are happy being a little bigger and they pull it off really well! Its your feeling about yourself that shows through your actions.).

The good news is that this isn't something permanent. Your able to change this by making decisions daily to eat healthier, exercise, and thus live healthier.

Life can't always be about chasing tail, sometimes it has to be about you. If your not able to love yourself, your not going to be able to love others to the best of your abilities.

I hope something I said can help. Good luck to you!

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Crowd to Crowd

You need to get excited about your life man. If I were you I would consume myself with nothing but books on success. I remember when I was in a super funk similiar to the one you're experiencing and got out of it my reading books like the Secrets, How to win and influence Friends, Think And Grow Rich, Awaken the Giant, etc.

You'd be surprised at how fast you can change this around.

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"Intelligence is nothing. Action is everything." -Tony Robbins

Alice came to a fork in the road. "Which road do I take?" she asked.
"Where do you want to go?" responded the Cheshire cat.
"I don't know," Alice answered.
"Then," said the cat, "it doesn't matter."
~Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

Go inside your soul, find the purpose of happiness, take a road which leads to that happiness and follow it through your life.
You have a goal= you have a road= you have a purpose

[ Johnny B ]

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When you lose, don't lose the lesson. ~Author Unknown
Fear has a large shadow, but he himself is small. ~Ruth Gendler

Shooting heroin does wonders for your wheight.

You could always stop looking at your body as if it were YOU.

But no time for rational solutions ^^