Should parents have played a role instead of PUA?



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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 12:43 pm 
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Just a question about what role you guys think parents should have played in our lives in regards to the girl. Obviously since we are on this forum and researching techniques we wanted to be more successful that we either :

A) Didn't recieve the proper help from our family and friends throughout our life (not too sure about the friend part however)

B) Was involved in an early incident with girls that put us off on the wrong foot.

I know the question is a bit vague but if anyone wants to elaborate that would be great.


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PostPosted: Tue Dec 01, 2009 1:18 pm 
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Now this is an interesting topic that i don't think gets enough attention. A guy might want to become a PUA for many reasons; but two pop up in my mind instantly..
1) to better themselves socailly, mentally, physically etc (which is healthy)
2) to get validation from women (which is not healthy)

Chances are a PUA will be thinking a combination of both reasons.. i know i do. It is curious to think that this way of thinking is probably a deeper rooted problem that started much earlier in life.

It is a pretty well known fact that the traits of the parents are rubbed off to their children, and the behavious which the children were subjected too during their early life will pretty much define the individuals personallity. This is not always the case, but in general if the parents have low ambitions, little or no education, living off government handouts etc.. the child will more than likely end up the same because there is no drive to succeed.

Same goes with other traits such as: social acceptance, openess to others, succeptability to opinion..etc.
For example: my parents are the polar opposite of eachother, my mother is more or less a "hippy", and my father is an engineer.. so from my mother, i was always brought up with a very natural surroundings, openess and encouraged to express myself; my father tought me the value of money to respect it, learned hard work, ambition and leadership..

I had a very confusing childhood.. peace and love on one hand; and blood, sweat and tears or the other.. lol!

It also goes the same with your second statement.. If people can get a fear of water - from a near death expirience involving something like swimming, then of course you can have a fear of the opposite sex because of an early expirience.. could be anything, but most likely a rejection.. which plants the seeds for AA, over years of neglecting to try beat it - it grows firm into your mind.. You begin to tell yourself you can't talk to her, she way out of your leauge.. bla bla.. its all just a problem with yourself.. we've all had it.

I guess what i'm trying to say with all this; is that you are right.. a shakey upbringing (especially where sex / relaionships arn't talked about), or a bad expirience early on can be root causes why we go into this PUA, this may not apply to everyone - but i'm pretty sure it will..

Look at Adam Lyons for example.. when he was in school - he was actually voted: "guy least likely to get a girlfriend".. look at him now, slept with literally hundreds of women, and just married a model..

Now, i really want to see where his class mates ended up.. :twisted: [/b]

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"They were right when they said "just be yourself" they just never told you what "self" to be.." - Gunwitch


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PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 1:08 am 
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I think most guys didn't have a father or didn't have a strong father figure to teach them how to be a man. I know that was my case. My dad is awesome but bottom line is that he didn't teach me very much.

All I know is that I'm going to instill empowering beliefs in my son.

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