Well i work for Bacardi, the drinks manufacturer, and i was out doing promotions in another big city in the UK, Newcastle. I thought "new city, renound for a good night out, perfect for a sarge." So i got my wing along for the trip, travel and hotel rooms payed for. I went out and worked then got changed for the night out. Usual peacocking material was worn and i felt good about me, i was well up for a night out, and in high spirits.

So we went out to the first bar filled with talent. We got a drink at the bar and were chatting to the bartender.(I had been working at this bar earlyer) I felt like i had quite a high social value as the banter with the bar tender was high and he was talking to us while serving a few worthwhile sets. A few were opened but i realy wasnt feeling the chat eventhough they were attractive. So we moved to a new bar. Again a few sets were opened and i started brilliantly had up to 5 sets totaly entranced.

However i started losing them quickly i, i couldnt escalate with my target well and eventualy came into the role of wing for my mate rather than as front player. My wing was on fire and number closed possibly two of the hottest HBs ive seen in a year and a bit. The more i got annoyed and tryed harder using material i know is solid, the more i fucked up. As a wing i was on fire i could easly keep 3 to 4 women busy while my wing worked on his target.

I dont know what it my problem was ive been in the game for 2 and a bit years and have gone in to clubs and bars and blown the place wide open. Ive left nights sarging with loads of numbers, got the f-close with georgous, deep women but on this night i dont know what happened.

The questions i pose are;

1. Has this happened to any of you more experienced PUAs?

2. What did you use to bounce back?

3. What do you think has happened?

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

1. I can totally relate to your experience, although Im less experience than you at PUA (only 1 year or so). It's the certain nights where you're trying so hard and nothing seems to work out. Then you get more and more weary, thinking, oh my god, its me, its my problem.

2. Truth be told, its not, and that negative thinking after the first few failures is just paving way for a slippery slope. Whenever something like that happens to me, i just sit back, relax, and be the desireless prize. Im thinking, wow, at least my wingman is having fun, next time it'll be me. You say you have material that can "totally entrance" your targets, and i love that. But don't forget, while you're intriguing them, you should be intriguing yourself too because self-amusement is key to a good night out. When you go into a set with an outcome in mind, you often lose that cool and your AFC parts start to show more. Its better to blow the set than to blow the mindset.

3. I think you just had a bad night. Everyone has bad nights . Don't be discouraged, keep sarging Cheers!

Thanks alot buddy, that was a realy helpfull post, even just the fact you have experienced it. I think ist just because ive not had a bad sarge in quite a while that its affected me so.

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

I just want to toss your toughts in a different direction for a little while.

Have you asked yourself : " Why is it bothering me that I didn't perform as well I as usualy do? " (or better wording of your actual dilema, I might have missed the true intent of your questions). You know you can pull numbers, f-closes and all. So why is this bothering you? Do you feel like a 'fraud' for having the success you had, or do you feel like you should pull 100% of the nights you go out or that when you connect with sets the way you did, you should get rewarded? Only you can answer that btw, I'm just throuwing things out.

Oh and to answr your questions more directly, I woudn'T worry about getting your game back. It's like when you are lost you key, you'll find them when you are not looking for them. The more you focus on the problem, the further you are from the solution.


Cheers!

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Drink me, make me feel real
Wet your beak in the stream
Game we're playing is life
Love is a two way dream

Thanks for your post buddy. I think its bothering me because as you said i feel i failed when it came down to the crunch in a different city. I just feel i had this huge chance, was totaly psyched, and flopped when it realy mattered. I think the word fraud is kinda perfect for how i feel. Im just doubting my own ability.

So you suggest i just go out and act as normal, but i think this will be in the back of my mind. Should i go out get another peacocked outfit, get a hair cut and go out feeling and looking better and sarge? Or stick with what ive got as "Deep down i know im getting better every week, and i just need to get my head back i the right place"

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

Are you having fun when you go out to sarge? Looks to me like you are thinking performance and all.

How about this. Don't approach a set in a week. Have fun with buddies and do casual stuff you want to do. Change your mind set. And reaproach the sarge scene when you fell detached from the outcome again.

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Drink me, make me feel real
Wet your beak in the stream
Game we're playing is life
Love is a two way dream

I live in Newcastle, when did you come and whereabouts did you go?

THEJ Yea i absolutely love it is like playing a game to me and when i get the girl i win. I love going out with the guys too. Ive just taken this set back harder than i expected. Thanks for your help buddy im going to take time off going out to sarge but still working on new ideas.

Trixta It was a friday night we went to, Baby Lynch, Floritas, Tokio, Tuc Tuc and the one down stairs from Floritas. We had a wee look at digital but it was a cockfest from what we could see.

Regards, Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

Dont worry about it mate. Everyone has a bad night every now and than but the biggest mistake ( opinion ) most guys do is that they go to bed and just say " I just had a bad night. " The lesson here is to learn and analyze what went wrong. Write up observations about the night what seemed to work for your wing, what was the things that sinked your game tonight ( was it the lack of Kino, did i run out of stuff, was it the bodylanguage, was there AA, how did the girls react to my stuff or certain things, what the other guys at the bar did, etc. ) and try to come up with solution. Good way to do this is to ask from your wing what he thought was the weakest thing in your game ( or observations concerning your game generally) because this allows you to observe your game in third persons ancle. He might notice something that you dont!
You gain experience when you go out but learn from it by going through your positive and the negative things, dont ignore it. These so called " bad days " only indicate that your game aint 100% solid ( dont worry, nobodys game is ) and provides you the opportunity to improve it. It shocks you out of the comfort zone to see that there are areas that need attention. Use this " shock " to improve your game instead of letting you down.
But yes, there are days when the sky cant be the limit and some occasion days when things dont go as you planned.
You will be just fine

[ Johnny B ]

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When you lose, don't lose the lesson. ~Author Unknown
Fear has a large shadow, but he himself is small. ~Ruth Gendler

JohnnyB is spot on. Good shit. Couldn't have said it better myself.

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DJ Fuji
Lifestyle & Dating Coach
www.taoofdjfuji.com
djfuji@taoofdjfuji.com

Have a question for me? Post it to the forum and then PM me the link and i'll reply with my 2 cents.

Thanks alot guys done a written anylisis today instead of my uni essay(It was on my mind so ive now freed it for work.)

I Ive come to the conclusion that i hyped it up so much that i got nervous. I remember feeling my face burning with nerves when chatting to one 4 set in particular. Ive not even felt like that when ive been acting on stage infront of hundreds of people. I think i worked myself into a frenzy and, as ashamed as i am to say it, i was desparate to do well. I plan to go back sometime soon and am planning to hit London in January.

Another mistake i made was that i was very happy to wing, and didnt push to go more solo or to lead. I gave my wing some fantastic advice , he said he was realy happy and that it was almost like i was coaching and in that mind set while i was Sarging.

To top all this positive self criticism, i got a nice wee number close today when i went to get some lunch on campus. Im feeling alot better. One piece of advice i would give is that if you have women that you are close to, in my case my flat mates, talk to them. They pointed out that i had been out of sorts all week and that i was coming across alot less approachable. That final comment has highlighted my whole problem on friday. I was uptight, i was defencive and i was very nervous all for no reason.

Thanks guys you are the epitome of what i thought i could get and give on the forum.

Regards, A much happyer Saint

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Attraction is the insatiable desire to be irresistibly desired

Also, don't forget that Geordies are basically fucking insane.

I had a top night up there a few years back, (good laugh I mean. I woke up in my hotel alone) but fuck me I struggled to understand a word they were on about. Until I was drunk - then they started making sense. I'm not convinced that the accent isn't that strong; they're just all very very very drunk constantly.

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Fancy hitting London sometime?
MSN/email: big.mickey.c@googlemail.com