kino question for you guys and back story



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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:23 pm 
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Question about kino here.. I'm 17 and this guy I know likes this girl that I sorta like. He started gaming her hard last week and she is a VERY flirty girl so he thinks that she likes him.

background on me and the girl: known each other for about 5 years - she's friends with my sister but even when shes with my sister she hangs out with me alone (came down and talked/flirted with me for 45 minutes on the computer once with my sister watching tv upstairs with another friend). She is very flirtatious. Kinda gives off the "easy" vibe.

Anyways, my friend was kinda all over her and here's my little chat with the girl on facebook about it:
me: *tease her about her and the guy going out eventually*
her: nooo
me: just playin' with you. you were mad flirtin with him it looked like tho.. u sure u dont like him a lil?
Me: altho u only rly have room for one lover at a time and i kinda fill that spot anyways hahaha
her: of course [my name] ;) hehe
and really? well i mean hes a nice guy and all but it kinda bothered me how he was like grabbing my legs and stuf i actually texted [friend] and told her to get him off me thats why she sat on me. . . haha and yeah i didnt realize i was flirting but i told him that im not interested in him but he basically said he didnt believe me or sumthin and hes still tryin and i dont kno wat to do cuz i already said i dont wanna be more than friends and i said it really nicely.

I want to get with this girl and makeout with her and just mess around with her she'd be great for that. But she's all flirty and then based upon the bolded part, him making a move is a turn-off?

How to I go about making moves and getting close to her and touching her without the reaction she just gave to the guy I know? What did he do wrong?[/b]


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:26 pm 
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Start with arms, back and hair, never look at the spots you are touching. Make it natural.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:33 pm 
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He most likely didn't consider the hierarchy of kino execution.

First: Shoulder
Second: Arm
Third: Hand
Fourth: Hair
Fifth: Legs

This isn't exactly a set in stone rule, but it's something I follow myself.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:40 pm 
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so you're saying he didn't get her comfortable with him being touchy with her yet. He proceeded too quickly? So if I go slower, she is more inviting to let me touch her more and is not creeped out by it? Wouldn't that just get her to see it as me just being goofy as a "friend?" She's ok with it because she feels I do not mean it in a sexual way right? doesnt that defeat the purpose?


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:41 pm 
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It was only a turn off for her because he never attracted her. One cannot start kinoing, or touching, a girl until he KNOWS for damn sure she feels some sort of attraction - your friend is untrained and mistook her flirty nature for indicators of intrest - n00b move lol
What id do if i were you is let him blow himself out, i.e. let him make her less and less attracted to him, and she'll keep coming and complaining about him to you - now i would avoid IMing-Keep your interactions in person, and generate a good comfort level.
YOU CAN kino her because she is attracted to you - her ditching ur sis to hang out with you is a CLEAR indicator of intrest. So you already have her attraction, start building comfort along with a good kino escalation - you can be making out with her steadily by the end of the week.

Happy gaming!

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Last edited by Saint Pixie on Mon Nov 02, 2009 11:18 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:54 pm 
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He didn't build any attraction, and he didn't do it in a comfortable manner most likely. He was most likely doing it almost robotically, making her feel uncomfortable, because he most likely felt kino was so important that he didn't focus on the other aspects of gaming a woman.

Go and do kino, but with your words make her follow you into a more sexual mode. That's going to show her that you're comfortable, yet not being "friendly", but you're building sexual tension. While doing that, use your tone of voice and other antidotes to control her emotions. She won't feel uncomfortable with you if you can successfully control the situation and her emotions.

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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 9:58 pm 
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thanks, these are really helpful. I am real comfortable flirting with her and getting real touchy with her but sometimes I do make the kino too robotic. I'm not quite natural with it yet I just do it because I know I am supposed to - I'm getting better, though.

And what do you mean about her being emotionally involved? do you have a good example or two?


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 02, 2009 10:42 pm 
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To get a girl emotionally involved in a conversation is simple.

What you got to do is make her feel she is talking to someone that has higher status than she does. This might actually be very hard for you seeing how long you've known her. It's much easier to do this during your first interaction with her, but nonetheless can be done.

Make her see a new side of you. If you've got long hair... cut it. If you've got a signature look about you, change it. Make yourself look completely different in her eyes through your outward appearance, and that is a good start to getting a girl emotionally into you.

Second. What you're going to want to do is talk with confidence. Make her seem like she's getting a great opportunity in just being able to talk to you. Easiest way to do this is to give the girl a compliment. What I like to do is walk right up to the woman and ask for her hand, then grab it, hold it up over her head and say "Turn for me babe." Then when she's done turning just say "You totally have some good things going for ya." Then if she doesn't get it, or if she doesn't follow up with giving you a compliment (Keep in mind, you've changed your entire look), say "Hey, now that's rude...not giving me a compliment in return. Who are you?"

Then boom. She's emotionally involved with everything you've got to say from that moment onward. Sense you gave her a compliment followed with a totally obvious neg about her manners, she'll be in check with her emotions the entire interaction. And it'll be easy for you to dictate her emotions using simple observations about her, and keeping ahead of the conversation. If she asks you a personal question. Flip the script and say something like "What is that? I'm not going to answer that..." Then ask her the same question. If she says the same thing or something just about like what you've said, then you've successfully controlled her emotions, and KEEP GOING WITH IT.

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PostPosted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 2:31 am 
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sounds good. I just normally see her in real social places with lots of other people around, so theres not many chances to do anything. I have heard before that it is not good to start too much kino buildup without ending with k-closs etc. Is it ok in this case and can I start back where I left off before or do I start over again?


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PostPosted: Tue Nov 03, 2009 9:33 pm 
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bump.


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PostPosted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 12:25 am 
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If you see her in a big time social setting. Make her environment smaller. Make her feel like you're the only person in the room. By doing that you'll build social proof between you and the entire venue.

Ways to do this is like playing chess. Find your target (In this case, the girl you know), and find pawns, or girls that seem to not be having a good time. And introduce yourself to them and keep in mind all the advice I told you earlier about making her feel like your of higher status and so on... then move in to your target with these girls, introduce your new friends to the girl, and all that shows the girl you know that you are socially accepted. Which is a BIG turn on for women.

If you can control the room, then it's much easier to control the woman you've targeted, because it's as if the entire room is rooting for you to succeed. It's very powerful, and most women are disarmed defenseless against the power of social proof.

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PostPosted: Wed Nov 04, 2009 1:06 am 
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I think touching a woman's leggs when you just met her, might be a little bit of an overexageration. I think arm around shoulder, holding hands, punching, arm around waist are enough for the first time you meet a woman, unless she follows you to your room, then you might touch her leggs.


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