hi everyone. I wouldn't ask this question usually, but I see that there's some good hearted people on this forum who give quality advice and also have skills so I might as well...

I've been in the US for a while now 5-6 years, but back home in Europe there's a girl I went to highschool with that I never interacted with great huh... anyway, I always kind of had her in the back of my mind, but while we were around each other in HS she was in a long term relationship, and I was a confused player teenager chasing everything around and then I moved to the US. She came once to my house party with her boyfriend, but never talked to me probably cause she a bit of a shy good girl. this girl is exactly my type, very very beautiful tall olive skin dark hair and just radiates a great personality through her eyes, not bitchy, kind and calm... now she's in marketing, just straight up the type I would love to associate with. we even have the same birthday, go figure, both introverts (as far as I can tell about her). we know a lot of the same people but I left that whole group behind since I havent been home in a while...

anyway, I found her on facebook, and we started messaging a bit but she didnt reply to my last message months ago, who knows for which reason. Im a god looking guy, not to sound arrogant, so on that end I probably have a green light... but I know its not about that so Im not counting on that at all...
she is in a long term relationship tho, I've seen pics of the guy, he's older than both of us (me and her are the same age, mid 20's), so she probably gets lots of stability and wisdom from him. He also looks like a good guy, and they're both in love from what I can tell... Im better looking but again, its not about that, so that doesnt give me almost any confidence about anything happening.

I was wondering what you guys think and if there's any hope there... Im not counting on it tho, we never interacted in person and she's probably very serious with the current guy. besides, we got the Atlantic dividing us, and even if we were in the same city it would be a long shot to link us...

Im not obsessing about this in any way, but Im just curious if anyone has any ideas. I would be willing to play some serious strategy with her in order to get some kind of conversation going.
maybe it doesnt matter but one of her good friends is a hotie that I didnt link with when she was interested in me years back cause she's just very shallow and Im the type of guy that prefers a link with more substance... so she might hold some grudge against me, cause in the last mail to the one Im interesting in I mentioned that one of her pics I recognize the location of because it was the house of the chick I rejected, and that I know her... so she might have asked her about who I am and that one might have talked shit or something. who knows...


is there any hope there, what kind of tone should I have in the message I send her again (if I shouls send anything at all)? Hopefully she doesn't merry the current guy )) I know the world is big, plenty of gorgeous fish out there, but this girl I feel Im very similar with in some unique way, way beyond just a physical attraction. How and why I think that, considering that we never had a face to face conversation, is completely beyond me...


any advice is much appreciated
thanks

Even if you can pull of this off, since you have really never spoken or connected with her except through facebook, I am worried you might be setting yourself up for disappointment. She may not actually be the girl you imagine her to be at all. People can be perceived a certain way but be completely different internally. Do you really want to make the emotional effort for this girl that you have hardly spoken to but mainly observed?

It might be a great thing and i'm not trying to kill your enthusiasm at all, just giving your something to think about.

no worries about killing my enthusiasm. Im not hard set on chasing her, but I do feel like if I dont pursue in some way I might regret it later in life. I made an effort to not make any assumptions about her beyond the somewhat obvious, which is that she's not the crazy party type but more of a long term type of girl... beyond that Im not going at it in my head, done it before and had what you mentioned happen to me.

also Im not going to drop my current 'restart' in actively pursuing other women, its long overdue, but I feel like establishing communication with this woman might lead to something interesting... you never know.

also I dont want to hold myself back much anymore, in fear of dissapointment etc. life is too short, Im getting older, and knowing myself in a few years Im going to get stuck on some female and really go deep with her so dont want to have regrets once I get to that point...


just dont have much wiggle room with this one, if any, and want to advise before making moves.


thanks