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I'm guessing I've gotten no response either because it's so long or the title is unattractive. CLIFF NOTES: I'm historically low on inner-game, new outlook on life in the recent weeks. Accomplished at work for my age. Girl approached ME after I talked with confidence in public to my friend for a while, giving sort of a speech to my friend in the cafeteria of my university. She asked who I had as a professor for a class, which didn't matter. I just smiled and thanked her for the info "confidently." She ran out of things to say, we exchanged names, I said I would see her around in a nice, smiling way, she left in a semi-awkward state. Advice? Seemed early to ask for a number and I was in a bit of a rush, not to blame it on the situation. More details below. Thanks.
ORIGINAL POST:
A little background, I'm in my early twenties, but as a result of circumstance and some hard work (for me), I've been around the corporate world for a few years and have risen to a professional technical position. This is to say that I know a little bit about getting things done and interacting with people. The problem is I've been lacking in my inner-game and only recently have built up a feeling of value and indifference that in reality I deserve. I'm tall and good-looking, with nice hair and good style, but overweight. I've combined my new outlook with a sort-of zen attitude of robust self-improvement and general happiness with what I have.
So with that said, I've recently returned to my university after an 18-month hiatus. Today I was in the cafeteria, explaining in a really positive and getting-things-done sort of way to my friend how I thought he should approach his student government work. The speech was effective and he was vibing with it, and so were a few people in the room, I was getting some interested looks. To the right/slightly behind me was this cute 7 playing with her phone, looking bored My speech went on for about 15 minutes -- I also talked to my friend about a class I was taking, Math. We exchanged glances a bit with the girl as I looked around and drank my coffee while talking. I had a view of her behind me in the reflection of the window.
Finally as I was wrapping up, I saw in the reflection: her clean up her hair for probably 30 seconds, put the hood to her hoodie on, then decide to take it back off, clean her hair up again and walk up behind me.
"Who do you have for Math?" she said in a friendly voice. My AFC friend immediately invited her to sit down, which she declined saying she had to go to class soon. Trying to recall for a few seconds, I mentioned the name of the professor. "Is it Jones?" she said. It obviously wasn't Jones. She went into a talk about how good Jones is and how effective his style is. I just smiled in an accepting way like I appreciated her insights. "Which Math are you taking, 1A, 1B?" She says: "Actually it's my boyfriend's dad -- well, ex-boyfriend..." I said "Oh, cool." She continued on about the professor, briefly. And it sort of ended there on a half-awkward note. I thanked her for the info. We exchanged names and I shook her hand with a smile and said "Nice to meet you, I'll see you around" in a genuine, smiling way. I never sent her the message of awkwardness of the situation, but she did all the talking and ran out of things to say, so de-facto I did.
As she walked away, even my AFC friend, who had a clear view of her cleaning herself up as she approached, said "I think she was hitting on you." I kicked myself for a while, but still did really well on my exam 10 minutes later, story of my life, keep on soldiering I guess -- It's a bit wearing though.
What would you guys have said? I'm inclined to just be natural, which is feeling really good to me. I can make things exciting and I have some good stories, but I need a bridge between the initial contact and knowing someone well enough to ask for a number. After that, it generally goes well.
She mentioned ex-bf for a reason clearly. I wasn't so cocky as to say something like "You seem really interesting, I wish I could talk right now, but I'm in a rush to an exam in a few minutes, do you have email?" or something like that. I could have gone into an anecdote about Math or talked about the Professor, I could have recalled something funny for just one or two minutes, then asked for the email in a time-constaint I suppose (this is just my thinking, not precision stuff I've read or anything).
How would you guys have handled it?
Cheers.
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