Shut out via text, how do I recover?



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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:11 pm 
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So my buddy has been trying to set me up with this girl. Normally I'd shrug it off but apparently she's fantastic in bed and I want a piece.

Texting back and forth today and things escalated between giving each other a hard time. Before I knew it she said something along the lines of, "you aren't a kind person, I'm done talking with you, you're just another asshole guy." I responded by telling her that I suppose asking about her sick grandfather (who she is close with) and offering to drop her resume at my old high school (she's looking for a teaching job) weren't acts of kindness. No response from her.

So how do I recover from that? Like I said, normally I'd shrug it off but I'd like to see if I can get back in the game.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:17 pm 
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im not going to pretend like im some sort of guru, but from the many many txting convos involving the whole "what is she thinking, should i reply even tho she hasnt" mindset it seems as if by txting or ringing her back, you would be giving an imprssion of almost grovelling and, whilst not the "asshole" she first thort, still probably not a guy she would want to fuck...

i would say leave a bit and then contact her when the previous convo is not fresh in her mind and she has come around to thinking in fact you not such a twat after all (without any prompting from you)

hopefully this has helped even if im not a PUA just yet ;)

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A PUA is for life, not just for christmas


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:24 pm 
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Yeah man, I think giving it a few days is best.

Def not a PUA, definitely an AFC for now. ;) Looking around at how to get started and trying to figure out what might work best for me.


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PostPosted: Tue Sep 01, 2009 11:32 pm 
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Same :)

if you find some good stuff please just email it to me (tom.bentley1@ntlworld.com)

and i shall try and do the same for you... build a good, strong foundation and the rest will hopefully follow (if a little slowly)....thats what im hoping for anyway!

x

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A PUA is for life, not just for christmas


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 9:16 am 
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Quote:
Texting back and forth today and things escalated between giving each other a hard time
was the banter playful/flirty? or argumentative and negative? sounds like you were way too harsh and not playful at all.

give me an example of a few texts which were sent between you 2...


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 10:27 am 
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You have to remember to give compliments. Sure you can throw in a neg or pay her out about something but always remember to compliment her or you will just be an annoying arsehole.

Like here's an example: I was chatting to a HB over msn tonight and we got onto the topic of getting kicked out of pubs. Turns out she has been kicked out a few times. So i'm like....

Antic: "Can't take you out anywhere :P"
HB: "Nope :)"

Keep the conversation happy and playful. Use emoticons.


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PostPosted: Wed Sep 02, 2009 12:12 pm 
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Quote:
You have to remember to give compliments. Sure you can throw in a neg or pay her out about something but always remember to compliment her or you will just be an annoying arsehole.

Like here's an example: I was chatting to a HB over msn tonight and we got onto the topic of getting kicked out of pubs. Turns out she has been kicked out a few times. So i'm like....

Antic: "Can't take you out anywhere :P"
HB: "Nope :)"

Keep the conversation happy and playful. Use emoticons.
when texting or chatting online, try not to use TOO many emoticons....else they lose their effect and you come across as this happy go lucky wuss thats smiling like an idiot from ear to ear 24/7.

You should be able to make her laugh using text without having to put a smiley face or 'ha ha haaa' at the end of every tease line. its tempting to put a smiley at the end of every line as youre worried she may not take it as a joke....but if your wording is right and you use it in the right context, its actually funnier when you dont use smileys. its the same as telling a joke in person and not laughing at your own joke, its 100 times funnier to the target. i used to use smileys at the end of all my text jokes....i disciplined myself not to and believe me it works. also, when you have a smiley at the end of your line it often looks like youre looking for approval...whereas if the joke is 'blunt', its like you dont care whether she found it funny or not (and you really shouldnt care)


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 Post subject: ino
PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:00 am 
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hahahahaah same thing happened to me in person..it isnt hard to switch around

a girl i just met i was messing with because she was bragging about being a stragiht edge started to get mad at me. within 10 min she said "wow u are such a fucking douche bag im never talking to u again" about half an hour after that we were making out and later had sex. easy to come back here is wut i did

so i made this girl mad, acted like i didnt care, and she didnt like that. so later that night i pulled a different side of me. i had the chance to talk to her alone outside. i talked to her starting simple just saying "so..wut is so bad about a guy like me eh?" got her made, but i put on a big smile and we ended up talking and i showed a littel bit of emotions. she loved it, and she is absolulty obsessed with me.

since this isnt in person, my suggestion is to give her a call within a few days, yes a phone convo. dont say "ohhh im sorry blah blah blah" but make it simple, just talking, and see how it goes. if it goes well ask if u guys can hang out in person an prove her wrong. it will work

mR.e

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PostPosted: Thu Sep 03, 2009 7:47 am 
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Quote:
"wow u are such a fucking douche bag im never talking to u again"
MrE, are you sure this wasnt just a shit test...doesnt sound like she was THAT mad with you? I wasnt there but i guess you could guage if she was really angry or not. If she was angry with you then man you did very well! Nothing like a 'fight' to increase sexual tension. My ex gfriend and i used to have the most mind blowing sex Ive ever had, and a big part of that was because we fought so much. It was like make-up sex 24/7! Not saying its healthy, but you get my drift.


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