Having this problem with a few girls - we have each other's mobile numbers, but I'm doing most of the calling! What's a good ratio of her calling you to you calling her?

I realize the number would be different for a girl you're gaming than for a girl you're in a new relationship with, so maybe you could comment on what you'd accept for both.

For girls I see relationship potential with and with whom I've known for a while now, I don't think it's acceptable that I be making more than my share of the effort to keep in touch. But if I'm open and honest and bring this up, aren't I sure to come across as needy of her attention and affection?

Where would you guys draw the line, and how would you tackle this? Because I do believe that girls who've shown an interest in you may try to play games and not call you. I don't know if you've ever read "The Rules", but it's the female version of "The Game" and it says things like 'Call a guy once for every three times he calls you'

So for girls that ARE interested but you SUSPECT they're playing games to try to make you want them more or bullshit like that, how do you change this behavior? After all, you just suspect they're playing games. Maybe they really aren't all that into you or their idea of a potential relationship wouldn't involve that much involvement with the other...?

I think you are overanalysing it. It is not so much about who calls as it is about the conversation.

Even if i call a girl every time we talk, if the conversation is cool, interesting, we both laugh and have fun, by the end of it she has already forgotten who was the caller.

My advice is that you just demonstrate to the girls that you have more choice than just them, that way she wont think of you as "needy" but rather be glad to hear from you, as you could have called any of those girls, but you called her instead.

~TK

Thanks for your response, theTK. So if you're in a relationship with a girl, you honestly don't care if she doesn't care enough about you to pick up the phone and initiate contact?

I realize it's a completely different story when it's a girl you're gaming, because in that case you don't have enough value in her eyes to actually merit a phone call - so you make all the calls at that point.

But once you've been on a few dates and things are progressing and you know she's interested, would you accept such 'gaming' on her part?

I feel my value plummeting in her eyes when it's the fourth time in a row I'm calling her, even there is a few days gap between each call - and she KNOWS it, and she knows that she holds the power in that relationship, at least with respect to phone calls.

If you are in a relationship and she never calls you, man, you are in a wrong kind of relationship.

Before i was referring more to the earlier stages of the interaction. If you are seriously dating and she still doesn't ever call, you haven't built up enough value in her eyes and she doesn't have the feeling like she could loose you. And what you have to do here has more to do with the actual conversation than being the caller.

With calling her, its somehow similar to opening with cold approach. You DO give her some initial value by doing it, but the value given is not so big that i couldn't be undone and reversed in your favor.

I general, do some playful neging, demonstrate to her that you have other options and not only her and just work on being a genuinely awesome person to talk with, and she will be calling you and asking you out, not vice versa

~TK

Perhaps some push/pull type stuff is called for in this kind of situation?