Sorry if I'm coming off as I'm better than this, but this behavior had me feeling really uncomfortable.

Recently I met with some guys from interacting online. I learned about the meet-up spot/"lair" and decided to meet them (normally I go out with friends, but I wanted to see what this was about).

From what I'm used to reading and practicing is approaching women from under the radar, mostly MM.

However, this person (out of the group) I met with was quite the opposite. He did, in what seemed to be rare cases, approach with a neutral personality. When he wasn't doing that, he was approaching women head on, right in their path, with comments like, "you're fucking sexy" (once saying it to a woman while she was walking with her son). I really didn't see any of these work, but he found it hilarious. So did I (at first), and until I noticed I was associated with the "creepy guy".

Walking from bar to bar, he would again cut girls off in their path, trying to hug them and saying "happy birthday!" or using that "sexy" comment again. Again, not too many positive responses. This behavior nearly sparked a 7 on 4 fight (me being on the side of four).

When I finally got time to ask him (he never took a break from approaching sets), I asked what this was all about. He said he uses these shock openers to filter out time. To know, at the moment of saying the opener, if they girl is going to be interested or not. I guess it makes sense and can work, but at what price? Normally I can approach without anxiety, but this had me feeling uneasy.

What also struck me is that it seemed like he was shot gunning the place, talking to everyone, not waiting to take a breather, and hoping to hit a streak of successful sets or eventually land on a successful one. That night, out of the 6 hours we were out, he got a number from a 5.

Anyone input on this? Thanks guys.

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Where I have crossed, the grass will not grow again.

MrLif,

Oh boy do I have some feedback about this guy! First of all, I know about some of the different sexual escalating and ballsy shock openers that are out there and those really aren't the ones I was thinking of. That guy is working off the law of averages and blowing out the rest of the room.

There are some very sexual openers and if you are calibrated, confident, and the girl is having FUN you can get away with saying a lot of weird stuff. I knew this guy once Doc Holiday who is now left the community. He told me this story about a guy who opened a girl with "Hey I wanna piss in your butthole." The guy was confident cocky and lucky I guess but it worked that night. Does that mean we should open with that, HELL NO!

Now I agree that I like direct openers for the fact that it doesn't waste as much time as being indirect. I can be direct and be immediately in or out. Where as indirect you make a lot of conversation before you eventually show interest if you are familiar with the Mystery M3 Model. It could be 15 minutes before you show interest to the girl and find out she has a boyfriend. Ugh! That can leave you missing opportunities and have you tied up for a while.

With that being said my default direct open is, "Hey I saw you over here thought you were interesting, and wanted to see what you are all about, I'm Jon." That is pretty direct and to the point but without being that creepy guy. I can find out fast if I'm in or not and go from there.

Also, better guys out there, myself included screen! I pre-screen people before I open them. I watch their body language and their interactions within a group many times before going over because I don't have anxiety and couldn't care less about the 3 second rule anymore. So I cheat a little bit using my social calibration to know who will be more receptive. Like in any good game if you can get the cheat codes...why not!

Like you said he was doing a shotgun of the place. I mean shoot we can go out tonight and open 100 girls each with "Hey you wanna go home with me " and probably 1 or 2 will say yes. I mean its just a mathematical probability. I don't like to play the odds I like to control the odds hence why I have studied this for the past years.

Most of the time, and I have friends that can attest to this. It's one open - one number, one kiss, and day 2 setup at the least! Then I'm hanging with that girl almost the entire night. Thats the odds I like! Granted this isn't every night but it's pretty close now. It just takes a good amount of correct practice to get there.

Please know we aren't all like this guy who is struggling and eventually he'll get it but he just doesn't yet. Lairs are a rough place to meet good people. I probably wouldn't hang around him again until he changes his behaviour.

GOOD LUCK OUT THERE!

JON

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Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Jsmooth, thank you! Hahaha.

I was super worried that THIS was the new way to approach women and it had me super worried. But after reading your response, I feel myself again, haha! And that example of a direct opener was priceless!

I totally like the idea of the direct openers, I sometimes keep it in the Mystery Method since I enjoy that part because I love talking, I love listening, and telling stories to get a rise out of people. Before even knowing there was a method to all of this, my friends would always joke that whenever I start talking, people around me start hanging off every word I said (not to toot my own horn!). I just find myself in a much more comfortable state when I'm doing this. But I would like to get comfortable with something different.

But yea, I like the idea of the direct opener if I can find my groove to it, it would really save me some time, haha.

Also, I really enjoyed knowing that you prescreen others as well. I catch myself doing this all the time (I don't really use that three second rule either). But I try to mirror their behavior, or to play off of it. My ying to their yang. If I notice that they feel out of their element, or standing by the wall, extremely close to their friend, I'll back off.

Case in point, that evening, that guy approached two girls that I had noticed and skipped them. Since he just runs in, guns blazing, I could tell within a second they were not having it. He thought different, kept pursing, until a boyfriend came over and told him to lay off.

Anyway, I don't plan on meeting up with this guy again. He's like a timebomb.

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Where I have crossed, the grass will not grow again.

MrLif,

You are welcome, and you're right he is a ticking timebomb.

I like pre-screening girls too. The best is when I see a hot girl that is being ignored for a while. I see a few guys brush past her and she's just standing there like WTF? Cause she is so use to being hit on. Then I go in direct and I'm a hero. LOL, I love social dynamics.

Jon

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Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...