Okay, so there was this one girl that I really liked in my dorm hall. She's really hot and everyone wanted to get with her. I hung out with her a lot, but she had a boyfriend from back home. But I still feel like we had something between us, anyways her boyfriend broke up with her and she was all down about it. I hung out with her more and being the total fucking AFC I was back then I told her I had feelings for her, and all of a sudden poof she wouldnt hang out with me anymore, she barely could talk to me. I typed her an AFC letter that basically explained that I was no longer going to contact her or call her over summer. And only a month later she sent me a message on facebook saying how she wishes we could be friends and that she's not okay with this. I replied nothing about being friends but did tell her how my summer was (she asked) and what ive been up to but i didnt add her as a friend yet. What do you think i should do?

I want to say this in a gentle and supportive way, so please take this as advice that will help you.

Okay, everything you have just described has wreaked of AFC and beta male. The good thing is, you seem aware of this.

Now, I will tell you what I would do. Hashby, I NEVER. I mean NEVER EVER allow a girl I want to fcloze put me into the friends category. My first instinct would be to just completely forget this girl and focus your energy on the other billions of women on this earth. Don't be a beta male and don't let her "friend" you. It's better to not be a friend at all than to submit yourself to that position for her.

If you want to give it another shot you have to put her in an uncomfortable position so that she either submits to you or she says fuck it and doesn't contact you anymore because she can't get what she wants (making you a pussy and puting you in the friends zone). What is that thing you have to do that makes her uncomfortable? You have to imply that the next time you meet it will be of a romantic/sexual nature.

Here's the email you're going to send back to her:

[Hey, it's good to hear from you. Funny, but when I saw your name on my message list it took me a while to remember who you were. So how's your summer been going so far? It's been going awesome for me. I met this exchange student from Finland. Dude, I had no idea people from Finland are so nice. This girl takes me out a lot when I have time. I've been working out at the gym too. There's a group of girls there too that have been inviting me out from time to time. Now that I think of it, there's one girl in that group that kind of reminds me of you. She's sooooo annoying. Ughhhh!!! She always runs up behind me and jumps on my back for a piggy back ride and then I have to tickle her to get her off. What the hell is that all about??

Umm, sorry, I only let people of a certain ilk be my friends. You haven't made the cut yet But we could start out with a date. How about we go to that lookout point and chill out and talk. Before you get too excited I'll just let you know not to expect anything more than tongue and nothing less than passion.

Alight girl, I'll hit you up when I have time again. I have to go get a gift for the exchange girl. Talk to you later

Hashby]

Try that one out. I know you're thinking that you don't want to make this girl uncomfortable with that letter, but trust me, it's necessary. Either she's going to start going in the direction you want or she's going to cut contact with you. Either way you win. By the way, I added a ton of DHV spikes in here for you and other tactics that are going to get this girl thinking in the right direction. Let us know how it goes bro.

Since you're not actually in a relationship, I moved your thread to Newbie Questions. Please post in the appropriate sections.

Your boy,
870

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thanks a lot Clozer, yeah the story you gave me was really good, and I picked up on all the things you added in there. Make it seem like i forgot about her, I'm having a good time, I have met some chicks that I'm hanging out with a lot one of which reminded me of you but she's annoying (neg), ect. Problem is that this wouldn't work cuz we live really far apart, the only time I might bump into her again is back at college. So, what I'm thinking of doing is next time i see her is playing hot and cold with cocky funny. I'm gonna make it seem like I'm not into her (We're too similar it could never work between us, plus you couldn't handle a guy like me). But honestly i dont really care that much anymore, when i go back to college I'm going to game at every party, but itd be cool to get an fclose with this girl considering I was dumb shit before. God bless the community haha