Newbie "sarge". Please critique.



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PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 8:23 am 
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Let me try to keep this as short as possible. I had a date from a girl I met online, but she flaked (the second and last time), argh. So I was at home thinking I could mope or hit downtown and have a good time anyway. Well shit, everything was dead since it's Wednesday, but I had some successes.

I went to a pool hall with the intent to jump on a quarter table and have some fun with strangers, but everyone was on the full tables. I sat at the bar, ordered a drink and two cougs, one attractive, one not really, came to sit, so I moved a chair over so they could sit together. When they had a lull in BS'ing, I suggested we all play pool, the target was very receptive. We shot a game, I spent most of the time fluffing the target and kino'd maybe twice on the shoulder. There wasn't a lot going on and they were drinking non-alcoholic. We shot another game and they decided to leave, which was fine by me since they were low energy. I let them know they'd have to teach me salsa dancing if I ended up in the same club by the end of the night. They were polite/enthusiastic about it.

Outside, ran into a super attractive girl I'd seen at my regular bar and talked to a couple times. Had a nice chat, good eye contact, zero kino. I figured I'd chat with her while she waited for her 2 male friends and she was happy for the company. I already told her I was going to another bar, so it's only natural I split with a hug when they arrive. She suggested we meet at our regular bar tomorrow.

Wandered around aimlessly, checked out my regular bar and it was pretty lively. Ordered a drink, walked around and admired the scene, but didn't talk to anyone. Watched a dance off. When the dance off was over, came up from behind a girl and casually stood next to her. Started a convo by asking if the girl rapping sounded like a guy to her, too. When the conversation died, I told her I had a confession and that I made a deal with myself to talk to the prettiest girl in the room, which she was. I told her I even surveyed the place a few times before deciding to try to deflect my creeper status for not going immediately up to her. She was flattered and melted a little. Conversation dropped off, though. I felt awkward just standing there, so I wandered off without saying another thing to her.

There was a group of 4 or so girls, one in the middle was cute, so I walked in the middle of them and announced that the target girl was cute and that I had to talk to her and asked her friends if that was okay. No objections and the girl immediately introduced herself and gave me a kino opportunity on the shoulder. I convinced her to shoot a little pool away from her friends, but then she changed her mind and wanted to get back to the group. We traded hats, kino'd her hair a little, she was a good choice. Lights were coming on and she was making ready to join her friends who ditched her outside to give us some privacy, so I asked for her number. She said 'No' and told me she had a boyfriend. Gave her a solid hug, night over.

Obvious mistakes: approaching 3rd girl from behind and waiting too long to talk to her, letting the convo die, approaching 4th girl from front and center, waiting too long to approach again, not enough kino all around, not setting time constraints to give the latter three girls some comfort.

Successes: engaged 4 great looking women, all 4 gave equal amounts of attention that I gave them.

Overall, way more fun than a newbie mission. Sorry that was so long, I wanted enough detail that you guys could actually weigh in. Thanks in advance!


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 Post subject: i think
PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 4:52 pm 
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you have to remember some of the little details. like the time constraints, very useful, and you also have to probably read up on the comfort building stage. you have the initial attraction down it seems

happy hunting

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 7:34 pm 
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Quote:
When the conversation died, I told her I had a confession and that I made a deal with myself to talk to the prettiest girl in the room, which she was. I told her I even surveyed the place a few times before deciding to try to deflect my creeper status for not going immediately up to her. She was flattered and melted a little. Conversation dropped off, though. I felt awkward just standing there, so I wandered off without saying another thing to her.
I think this may have gone better too, its only my opinion but: you told her shes the prettiest girl in the room which raises her value, alot, it may have been better to have said you are looking for the prettiest girl in the room, can she help you find one?
that way you can cheeky smile, maybe get some kino going both ways or depending on what she says, work out what sort of person she is.

you also told her you tried to deflect your "creeper status"? thats a bit of a DLV for you id say, may have been better to have not said it.

wondering off without saying anything, also you shouldnt do, it doesnt take much to say: "well it was night meeting you, have a good night"

also had you locked in to these sets? if so you can just ask them what they do? etc it may trigger something that you can talk about.
oh and were you alone? as a wing may have helped in all the situations.

sounds like you dont have any AA which is great!

those were my thoughts, i know its different infield but that was my 2 cents :D


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 02, 2009 10:34 pm 
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Oh, ha, I didn't say I was a creeper, I just thought it. Serves me right for overthinking the whole thing. I have AA which prevents me from just diving in immediately, but then I end up doing it anyway. I was able to isolate the girl from the set, even after we walked back to them she was only paying attention to me. I sort of learned from that if you ask a group if it's okay to talk to their friend, they'll sort of leave you guys alone (woulda been nice if one of them pointed out she had a bf there, too). I like to be direct, the risk of rejection is nothing compared to the self-loathing of being a coward and not even approaching. I always go it alone. I might have to make a call out for a wingman. Thanks for the feedback, I'll have to look into comfort/rapport building. I also learned it's a bad idea to just wander off from a girl you started chatting to, it seems kinda weak.


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