Hey guys. I am new to the forum. Nice to meet you all.
Basically, I wanted to give a scenario I am living and then ask for any advice you may have. So, I live in Japan, just outside Tokyo. I have been here for 9 months (and before that 1 year to study abroad with a year in between to finish college). I have been tired of being shut down and losing my confidence, so I decided to join the PUA community just as a confidence booster. A lot of this stuff is great but I am finding that much of the advice here is ill-suited for Japan. Here's why:
1) In Japan, standing out as the cool alpha male is not exactly good. The society here is group-oriented and standing out too much does not make you look alpha, it makes you look weird.
2) There is virtually no day game. People rarely talk to people they don't know and you are almost guaranteed to be ignored. (Some girls get so frightened of expanding their circle of friends that they'll threaten to call the police if you just try to say hello)
3) The bar and club scene is different from most other areas in the world. Bars in Japan are not places where singles go to meet new people. Rather, you'll find that most bars are filled with guys watching a soccer match or couples grabbing a drink together. Girls rarely come to bars in groups. Also, there are places called "izakayas" where people come and drink in groups but each area is separated. If you were to speak to people at an izakaya, the staff would order you back to your seat. Clubbing is the most similar to other countries but still pretty different. People will go to a dance floor and just
stand. I approached several groups who just ignored me because 1) the music is loud and 2) i'm not within their group of friends.
4) Most women consider it a goal to be married by 25, which means they need a steady relationship by 23, which in turn means it's hard to find girls who are single and not weird or obsessed with marriage.
Has anyone experienced this in Japan? Or something similar anywhere else? Any ideas on where to meet people, how to go about it, and how to attack the language barrier (I actually speak fluent Japanese so that's not too big of a problem). Thanks guys.
CHAT