Hey guys, I'm new to the forum. I'm 21 and I hope to gain social skills with girls but with people overall as well.

I've been getting exposure by going to clubs. On some days it felt pretty awkward cause I go alone. A lot of times I get anxiety (usually mild) just from talking with coworkers, classmates etc. This anxiety manifests itself in my mind blanking out, making it hard to me to come up with things to say. It's not that hard for me to approach girls, but keeping up a good conversation is a different story.

I'm a pretty reclusive person. I've tried to expand my social circle, but it's hard.

Based on what females have told me (without me asking) and how girls and especially older women react to me, I honestly consider myself a good-looking guy, but my interaction skills are lacking.

Any advice on the club outings and working on my social skills (or anything else really) would be appreciated. Thanks.

Thanks for that post man. I would just say keep at it. There is a wealth of information online about pickup/social interaction including lots of audio you can find. Read books, read posts, and continuously put yourself in situations where you have to be around and talk to people. I became a Karaoke DJ at one point and it was a challenge to host shows but by the 200th show or so I was completely comfortable in front of 100+ people or more. Maybe you could try to work for an entertainment company in your area. Or maybe a job waiting tables? You could treat every table as a set and try to make them become interested in you. I hope that you do well man, I used to be exactly like that and now I could hold a press conference naked on TV.

_________________
A belief is a thought you make real.

Hello,
I have been out now Six times on Saturday night to several different bars/clubs. The first time it was kinda intimidating and I was petrified. I always go on my own.

It still is a little intimidating. But the girls I have previously sarged but have stayed in the friend zone or odd guys who are there who instantly are open to conversation. So I am getting to feel more confident. Also i go to the same places so that my feeling of confidence is increasing because I am getting to know the places.

Initial nerves I guess are to be expected. I am a long way from being a "love guru" but I have to be honest and say that the uncomfortable feeilngs have been worth it. I am a much more confident person. Either way, I am going to do it even if it feels uncomfortable. Approaches still are anxiety provoking for me. But if I could be 21 again, I am 38, I would say to myself Go out of your comfort zone and get out more and make loads of approaches. Time in the field is the real teacher that makes you the real deal.
hope that helps. Best of luck dude.

21 is a good age, im 23 myself. Where abouts do you live because I find that might have some different affects on your game.

I find when im in the states the game worked a lil different to when im home in the UK?

Anxiety normal and to be honest you are taking the right approach, your grabbing the bull by the horns and going for it. Better than most AFC's do in a lifetime. Going out on your own is a big thing to do for a lot of people, I know I can go out, make friends, meet new people and also keep up with the bar staff ive been using as pivots. But I still usually go out with a wing. I think occasionally I fancy a beer on my own and go and have it but nothing major.

In some sense's you have less anxiety that you think, ur mind knows what to do just your body is resisting

Thanks for the tips guys.

Mr E: You're right, I do need to go out of my comfort zone and get more exposure. BTW, I've been told places have more people on Friday nights: everyone's gotten out of work, happy hour etc.

Chrosiris: I'm not really the entertainment industry type lol. It's not the same, but I work at a supermarket, which allows me to approach females when I see them, which I do take advantage of. "Do you need help with anything?" lol.

Zikki: I'm in Miami, FL. As I'm sure whoever has been here knows, it's definitely different from most of the US as far as culture goes. There are MANY attractive girls here, and I'm trying to take advantage of that.

Anyway, it's just a bit awkward at the club sometimes when you're alone. Sometimes it's difficult to actually look like you're doing something there when you're by yourself. The few guys that I talk to outside of work and school etc are kind of reclusive like me, except they don't really go out to these kinds of places and have very little drive to go out and get good with seeing girls.

But, anyway, I'm still gonna go to another club this Friday and see how it goes.

if u frequent the same place more than 3 times by now you should have the bar staff and maybe a couple of doormen on lock, your first few solo flights in a club should always be making sure the staff know you. In your situation they are the key to the game.

I love Miami, im a big fan of all the tasty latina's ;P

So gotta come back bring my Brit game with me lol