This maybe the strangest thing ever but my i was teling my friend about this girl i was having problems with and saying that i never got any IOI's from her.

He asked me if i flirted with her?

And i couldn't say i had. i mean i negged, C and F'd and built some attraction but i never flirted. I don't know how...

I'm aware of push/pull and sexual inuendos but how do you... flirt?

Is it stuff like asking her: what turns her on? and then negging her on it?

Educate me please. I have so much to learn!

Dude... I've been wondering this same thing for a long, long time. I didn't know what "flirting" actually was when I started pickup, and I'm still not sure of what the hell it actually means, because it's not a technique. Lol.

I just realized how much of a dork I am. I just looked up "flirting" in the fucking dictionary.
In "community" terms, you SOI her in some way and you both let each other know that you're attracted to one another.

So what your friend said made sense. As a poker player would say, you've got to give action to get action. If you aren't expressing any interest in the girl, she's going to be reluctant to express interest in you because she's afraid of getting shot down.

I know, I know, this is the "seduction community" and expressing actual interest in a girl is an "AFC" thing to do, but SERIOUSLY. Letting a girl know that you're interested in her will open her up to you mighty quick, especially if you do it 1) early, 2) tastefully, and 3) non-needily.

So next time you see this girl, you say: "Hey. I like you. Let's hang out together this weekend."

I view flirting as verbally and non-verbally sub communicating a desire to be physical with that person in a playful manner. It is not a SOI. Because it is playful, there is an element of plausible deniability, meaning that she doesn't feel like she is being hit on, which makes the interaction much more comfortable.

Flirting is subtly communicating sexual interest and having fun at the same time. It is making the other person more open to the idea of a more-than-friend type of relationship with you. I think flirting is made up of teasing, pushing her away, pulling her back in for a hug, smiling, eye contact, laughing, sexual innuendos, kino, mystery, vocal tonality, sexually heated topics, and the creation of a desire to want more.

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i sort of get you.

can you give me some conversation samples with flirting in them.

because i'm still not 100% sure how to go about it

Flirting is subtly communicating sexual interest and having fun at the same time. It is making the other person more open to the idea of a more-than-friend type of relationship with you. I think flirting is made up of teasing, pushing her away, pulling her back in for a hug, smiling, eye contact, laughing, sexual innuendos, kino, mystery, vocal tonality, sexually heated topics, and the creation of a desire to want more.

It doesn't get clearer than that.

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Keep people off-balance and in the dark by never revealing the purpose behind your actions. - Robert Greene

Not really. I could write out a seemingly normal, average conversation here, but in some situation it could be heavily flirtatious. Something like 70% of communication is physical/body language, 23% is vocal tonality, and 7% is language. You will recognize flirting when you see it. If the conversation feels sexually charged, perhaps role playing a bit, where you are going back and forth with a girl in a fun way, then you are probably flirting. But like I said, most of the communication is in body language and tonality.

I don't think this isn't a science that you can break down and reconstruct. This is something that is natural and you will do automatically IF you are comfortable. There is a very wrong philosophy that is propagated through parts of this community, especially MM and it's derivatives. There is the belief that you are after this 'target' and because of that she is placed on a pedestal. She is a prize to be won. If you have this philosophy, it is less likely that you will be comfortable enough to flirt with her.

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It's funny you should ask this question. I was at a workshop last weekend and for the first time I realised that men don't actually just inherantly know this concept and I was shocked. Flirting is what makes interacting with women fun for me and without it I just don't see the point, even if it does end up in sex, I missed all the enjoyable stuff along the way.

This is the reason why I have been creating a new workshop teaching advanced concepts specifically revolving around flirting. I have had a lot of guys stare at me blankly when I told them to "just flirt with her", but there's never enough time in a standard workshop to teach everything there is about flirting sufficiently, so it always frustrated me because this is a skill that every guy needs because every woman craves it!

That workshop I mentioned before had 9 guys and 6 girls. When we did an excercise where the girls got to pick the guy they were with the 3 assistants sat out so that it could be a 1-to-1 ratio. I was an assistant, but 3 of the girls still picked me and 1 refused to be with anyone else. Now I'm not saying this to brag (although it was pretty nice, lol), but because the reason the girls kept picking me all weekend was because I am a shameless flirt and they loved it! Every time I talked with a girl she would end up giggling and saying stuff like, "God, you're so playful!" or "You're so much fun!" or "You make me feel safe".

Those kinds of things make girls feel happy around you; good when they're around you and not as good when they're not. This is what makes women desire to be with you. As Sean Messenger put it, "Seduction is when you make a promise to her that being with you is going to make her feel better than she does now". Flirting is that seduction part. Without flirting, you don't attract women, or if you do it's dull and it's not fun or sexually charged at all. You HAVE to flirt!

If you are interested in learning the art of flirting, body language, advanced communication skills based upon NLP, how to go about kissing a girl, how to escalate things physically into having sex with a girl and a few other powerful skills, then you should think about taking my Advanced Concepts Workshop. It's an entire weekend entirely focused on teaching those things, with the help of one of my female coaching assitants to demonstrate all those things and for you to practice a few things with. You get a chance to practice real skills in a safe environment, with a willing girl who will give you feedback, so that when you are doing it in real life you'll know exactly what to do!

All my workshops are currently open for anywhere in North America and in May I'll be touring Europe. PM me for more details!

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

yeah flirting has always come natural for me its escalating that i have problem with.

flirting tips. when ur talking to her you have to kinda smile with your eyes. like your going to start laughing as soon as you finish your sentence. but you have got to have good eye contact.

sexual innuendos you have to kinda be suggestive but playfully this is where tonality is important. and good key words like. naughty, freaky, erect,even a word as simple as big. but its like what the guy a couple spaces above me says you have to have denyablity

for example: your talking about something like school and she mentions maybe something like she missed a class for some reason. you look at her with those smiling eyes and say oh "naughty naughty" if you say this with the right tone she'll pick up on the innuendo

or freaky: she says she likes something thats kinda unique like I was talking to this one hb8 and she said she was a born on a farm and she loves the feeling of steping in cow shit. and goes on to explain how its warm and squishy.(warm and squishy sound like something to you too huh) so anyways im like wow your kinda freaky huh?

erect you would comment about how something was erect or stood firm and solid. like I was positive the tree was going to fall down after that big of a storm but to my surprise it stood erect. again smiling with your eyes while making eye contact. she will most likely smile and laugh or at least giggle if you say it right

or something as simple as she comments on how she would rather have the larger variety of something say she is glad there are 5 dollar footlongs at subway cuz she likes the footlongs cuz she can save the other half or somthing like that. you look at her again with those smiling eyes and say something like ooooh so you like em big huh? she will definatly pick up on this one and may be shocked or offended most likely she will just giggle and laugh possibly blush. but no matter cuz this is where the denyability comes in you can just hit her with something like "Im talking about your sandwich jeez get your mind outta the gutter woman."
if she reacts positively, and says something like "You Damn Right I Do." "you can just say huh so your kinda freaky huh? I like that in ya"

the possibilities are endless this kinda stuff is fun but these are few of many you really just have to take the concept and run with it. hope I helped a little

Thanks for the feedback as always but i'm still not getting it. I mean casinova the examples you gave me seem kind of... well, weak...

There has got to be more to it than that.

Can someone give me an exact sample of a conversation they had with a hb that has flirting in it because for some reason i'm just failing to really fully grasp the concept of flirting.

It's anoyying the hell out of me but i'm just not getting it. Flirting to me at the moment seems like i need to memorize lines off but that obviously thats not what flirting should be.

How do i do it?
How do i innitiate it?

I know you've answered me before (to an extent) but i really need it SPELLED OUT IN BLOCK CAPITALS because ultimately i'm just not grasping this concept of flirting.

Conversation Samples will help i'm sure . Thanks again for the support

have you ever watched a movie?

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Sean Messenger
http://LVo3.com

"War is not the answer. Love is."

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the place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum...

The thing about flirting is that it isn't WHAT you say, it's HOW you say it. I can have a conversation about making a peanut butter and jam sandwich and flirt like crazy, but if you transcribed the words it would just sound like I was talking about lunch.

The words you use are only approximately 7% of the meaning, 55% is body language and the other 38% is voice tonality. Those numbers vary depending on the medium you are using to communicate (in-person, text, phone, etc) but you can obviously see how little of what you are saying is determined by the words unless you are using a completely text based medium like msn. Even on msn you use things like smileys, capitalizing and punctuation in order to convey voice tonality and body language because without them the conversation is lacking in properly communicating what you truly mean.

Stop focusing on the words you use and instead focus on how you are saying those words. I suggest checking out comedies in order to learn this concept. You can easily find videos online from some comics that are really good at this skill. I recommend Dane Cook, Joe Rogan and Chris Rock for starters. Pay attention to how they modulate their voice depending on what emotion they are trying to convey. Do the same thing with flirting.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

the examples are generic its the concept u have to understand its something i usually do naturally without thinking and i think u prolly do too without thinking u prolly didnt know its classified as flirting but basically if your holding eye contact and playfully teasing and joking with her smiling and laughing with her u are basically flirting sorry if i can't explain it better its like that guy said if I put a conversation here you wouldn't get it because its how u say things and your body language and facial expression that makes it flirting

Ok well if had 5% knowledge of what flirting is I'd now be on about 30% I'd say.

I'm having trouble finding videos with flirting in them.

Any links you can throw me guys?

Oh and thanks for the feedback as always

PS: I was surprised to see a girl on here, i wonder in 10 years time maybe PU will be known by everyone, girls and guys alike. Which will mean we will all be equally good at picking up which will lead to our population increasing like wild fire and then soon we will all go hungry due to overpopulation and the human race we will be doomed... maybe?

hear hear on it not being in what you say. you don't have to say anything at all and can still be flirting.

good examples of flirting: buckle down, get over your pride, and watch a couple chick flicks. the stories are all very similar but they all have flirting.
that makes me laugh. i don't know about other girls on here, but i'm pretty much keeping this site to myself. it's a funny (if slightly scary) thought though. but don't worry. i think girls would MUCH rather be picked up than try to pick a guy up.

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the place where optimism most flourishes is the lunatic asylum...