| Free write . . .
Carry around a notebook and write. You're not being graded. Just write, write, write. I'll give you and example:
I'm sitting in a cafe right now. I'm the only customer. It's raining outside and I'm wondering how the hell I'm going to walk back home. There's a cute waitress behind me and I've seen her again and again for the last month but I haven't held any conversations with her because she doesn't speak English. I've done the stare game with her as in STARE at each other . . .and then smile like, "Oh yes, we appreciate each others outer beauty" . . . It's cool . . . it's kinda sexy. Oops, there we go again with another waitress. Stare . . . she smiles first. She looks away first. When she looks back, I'm still smiling at her and now she giggles and puts her cute little fingers in front of her mouth in efforts to hide her nervous giggle but I can see teeth. Ahh the bits of flirting we do in a day . . .
I just wrote this in less than 5 minutes. Actually, I think less than 2.
Some of you can't improvise and speak what's on your mind because you're setting yourselves up. "I have to be interesting." "I have to have a routine." "I have to do this." "I have to do that." "I have to do everything right." "This girl has to like me." "I must be liked."
Think about all the rules that we abide by in a day. Our society gives us a set of routines that are acceptable and unacceptable. If you really meditate on this, your MOM WAS RIGHT. "Just be yourself . . ." This is the way.
You are NOT a guy who NEEDS anything. We don't NEED to do this and that and do everything right. So . . . just let it go and begin with writing what ever the hell it is that is on your mind in any moment. If you can do this . . .you can move onto the next phase and focus towards a specified goal.
Next, write a "pretend routine". Sit anywhere and watch an interesting girl walk by. Then write down your routine. And it's gotta just fly out of your fingers. You know the rules. you need to open, routine, close. Keep that in mind. And keep a track of where you are during the interaction. Example:
A cute girl just walked by the cafe with a black rain coat, green shopping bag, pink handbag, and knee high boots. Umbrella. Great smile:
K: Excuse me, Do yo know where ______ is? (Choose location in direction she's walking)
hb: Yes, it's blah blah . .
K: (Look down at her boots the whole time) Oh, I'm sorry, I was looking at your boots. They look great on you
hb: blah, blah
K: But what's the deal with all those bags? Are you on a strategic shopping mission?
hb: blah, blah,
K: Cool, so are you going this way?
hb: Yes, blah blah
K: Listen, I'm a really shy guy and I wouldn't ask this but I'm getting a little wet here. You mind if we share the umbrella?
hb: Oh . . .no problem!
K: Ha ha. . . look at that guy, he was staring at you for like 5 seconds!
hb: No . . no way. I don't think so.
K: I bet he thinks I'm your boyfriend. I bet he's really jealous of me.
hb: ....
K: Look, turn here and let's take a look at the window. Hmm . . . maybe we don't look so good together. Well, no. Let's try this. (Put her arm around mine) Oh yeah, that's much better.
hb: .... (But I know she'll smile)
K: I think this is my street right? Thanks . . . bye! (And just walk away, walk away, 5 seconds)
K: (Then run back) Wait, wait. . . Jeesh, I rarely do this but I just felt like if I kept on walking away, we might never see each other again. Do you have email? At least this way, we can keep in touch. . . you know, I might get lost again?
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Shit, this one took me over 5 minutes. I wrote this one up after seeing that girl who walked by 5 minutes ago. If you can slam it out on paper or keyboard, you can SAY IT. You have to practice through writing. Some are naturals . . . 99.999% are NOT. Do you think those improv comedians just stand up and go at it? 100%, they sit at home and write, write, and write more to prepare.
Our game is much easier. If you do this for one day, you can slam out 8 routines in short time. If it was a contest, I bet I could slam out over 100 routines in a day. Do this for 4 weekends in a row and you have 32 in your pocket. Then all you do is a variation of your 32 routines based on unique situations. Very simple. . . but it takes effort.
Or you can just plagiarize the cube/ladder/are you twins with C lips routines. Up to you.
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