Hi, I'm new to this stuff. The whole, "seducing women" and whatnot in general. I hadn't even heard of it until a few weeks ago. I'm 19, btw.

I began looking through it, and I noticed something called "boyfriend destroyers".

To be quite honest, I'm scared to death of them. My main reason for joining this forum was not because I need help picking up women. It's because I need help keeping one.

I have been going out with a girl for about 3 months, it's my second long term relationship (or at least, what's intended to last long), my last one being 2 years. The girl says she really loves me. I sometimes get very possessive and jealous. She tries very hard to address my needs and I can tell she cares about me very much.

I am very scared. Trust and commitment are difficult for me, but I really love this girl and I'm afraid of getting hurt.

I guess my questions are as follows:

1) If this girl really loves me, will "boyfriend destroyers" work on her? Does it only work on girls who are unhappy or unsure, or does it work on all girls?

2) Am I at the mercy of PUA's? I know some good PUA's will not hit on a girl with a boyfriend out of moral code, but if they were to do so, would it be guaranteed?

3) If either of these are true, what can I do? I don't want to be cheated on or hurt, and this "boyfriend destroyer" stuff creeps me out.

wow, i really never thought about it your way. I feel like an asshole now:S ok this is a well good question! umm ofthe top of my head if u think some guy is "BF destroying" u reasure her
A commen boyfriend destroyer as u might know is that they will compliment you (the boyfriend) and say that u are perfect to the girl so she begins to question it. How do u stop her from picking out your flaws?
Not sure, perhaps if she is aware that your not perfect and u have discussed it with her the bf detroying wont have effect..
psch i dunno, ahve u though of anything since?

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oxford city uk. looking for local contacts. pm me

I don't know. I keep hearing these stories about girls who "regret it" afterwards. I hear about men cheating on their wives even with kids. I hear about girls who dont' realize they're getting chatted up and the next thing you know their kissing guys even though they have boyfriends.

If people in long term, committed, loving relationships fuck things up, how does a 3-month relationship like mine have a chance against people who practice this stuff?

My woman isn't stupid. And she is honest. She tells me when she feels like something is wrong, and she knows when men are interested in her. She is not oblivious and she is on her guard. And I am the same way. I don't want to be hurt and in the same way I would never want to hurt her because I am crazy in love with her.

I guess my insecurity is that perhaps that isn't enough?

What are your experiences? Are some girls committed enough to just not go for PUA's when they have a boyfriend?

I think I'm going to have to radically rethink the way I look at relationships, including long term relationships, if they can be stolen from me so quickly...

Women usually cheat for different reasons than guys. For them it's an emotional itch they are trying to fulfill. That's why pickup is about playing to a woman's emotions versus logic.

You can learn to fulfill that itch by learning to be a good PUA yourself thus diminishing the chances of a GF cheating.

This article is a start http://www.seductionbase.com/seduction/ ... s/284.html

Honestly there's not a shitload of material out there on this topic and it can seem like every girl is out there to cheat. It's bullshit though. Realize you are always gonna hear the field reports and tactics that created success on stealing a woman from her boyfriend, not the ones where the girls were faithful and committed to their relationship.

Lastly I've always held the belief that if a girl is suspect to cheat at any level, she's not worth my time. If I were you, I'd adopt the same frame. High value women who will stand by their man are in abundance as any good PUA will tell you.

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Elite Game to destroy the competition...YouGetTheGirl.com!!!

Aye, Hobbit is correct. My addedum to that is your attitude. You need to not be so worried. Thats an emotional weakness that an alpha male doesnt have. Your girl doesn't want you to be like that. As the others said, if you satsify her emotionally and physically you have nothing to worry about. That doesn't mean be her lapdog, but keep the relationship steady.

Thanks guys, you really reassured me.

If this girl cheats on me because of an itch it's really not even the PUA's fault I guess.

I will work hard to keep her satisfied, she's worth it.

OK the reason someone can take a woman from her long term boyfriend is because the boyfriend is afraid of commitment. If she is not satisfied with the level of commitment, the bf had better be scared.

I have a code that I willl not continue a sarge if I find out a woman is married, or if she is engaged and has a date set. Problem is, what if I don't get around to asking that until she is so turned on that if I back off, she will rape me.

Here is what I use to destroy a BF...
HB: I have a boyfriend.
ME: THat's AWESOME! Congrats! How long have guys been together?
HB: Six months.
Me: Oh, wow. I would not have guessed that long. I don't see a ring on your finger. Don't you think it's time to upgrade?

I then transition to other cool stuff to talk about.

To keep her from dumping you, you need to do two things. 1. Be a better PUA than I am. 2. Quit gaming other women and set a date to get married.

Why do you need to set a date? Because I know enough to know that guys will give a woman an engagement ring to lock her in, but won't ever set a date. No date...no real commitment.

And "promise rings"? HA! Unless you are a military person, a promise ring means nothing other than you spent $100 on her. I can top that with one dinner out. And, during that $100 dinner, I'll be amping the romance that she'll forget all about you.

So, with my being a jerk, I hope I motivated you into either committing yourself to be a better PUA than I am, or into committing to your girlfriend to the point you'll pull the trigger and get married.

Of course, the likelyhood I'll meet your girlfriend is pretty low. Is she going to be in Washington, DC or COlorado any time soon?

Um I'm pretty sure you wouldn't be able to steal my girlfriend, to be honest, you sound like a douche

But wait, this advice is different from what the others offered. I don't get it. Do I need to keep the relationship fulfilling, or do I need to be a pimp? What exactly do you mean by being a better "PUA"? Isn't a PUA a pick-up artist? Why do i need to do that, I already got her.

I am committed to the relationship and so is she, but we're not getting married any time soon.

a new angle, i like it, however, all im going to say from a pua point of view... and i know this is expected, i would say, thats a major one-itis and i would try try rid yourself of this deeeeep attachment.... solves all problems of being hurt in the first place plus will prob make her more keen and leave her wanting more.... so she will be less likely to cheat, cos if you assume shes going to cheat or are worried that she will, she'll end up doing it anyway cos she will get fed up and assume you are thinking she is cheating, so she thinks she might aswell... lol, whatever image you project and focus on, you will obtain. choose that image, you want to be strong and in the up position.

i agree with mr.naturals post.

also if you become needy and suck up to her doing what she wants and looking to her all the time, then she will get fed up cos a main need of a girl is to be needed. i know i sound like im going against my word but, if you think...it goes like this...

you satisfy her by encouraging her to satisfy you....

a positive need, not an 'i need you, and love you so much i never want to loose you' need.... its an 'i like you and seeing as we are together, i need you to satisfy me need, otherwise, why are we together?', which develops a more happy balanced relationship anyway...
as i said dont think about destroying bf destroyers... go right to the root of the problem..... stop it affecting he rin the first place and be THAT guy... the alpha powerful one and no guy will bf destroy you anyway cos they will see tht they'll get social damage for messing with a high status sociable male.

so in order to satisfy her need, you must be dominant and encourage her to satisfy your needs first.

she can only enjoy sex fully only if she feels it is a reward for satisfying your needs.

good luck!

spread the love....

~sierra~

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I like to hybrid techniques, inner game and methods with my own natural game.

Whoa. Um, first off if I'm in a relationship where her biggest incentive not to cheat is a social one (he's popular, he's an alpha male) or her only reason not to do it is that I've scared others into not fucking with me then I dont' think that's a relationship I can enjoy. I want her to not cheat on me regardless of how popular I am or whatever.

Also, I don't want to be "dominant". I want her to be my equal. And I'm pretty sure she wants that too. Sure I want her to fulfill my needs, but I want to fulfill hers too. I don't get why that's not good enough.

If there's a batch of honest women that would just never cheat on their boyfriends, and could not be emotionally manipulated into doing it, I'm pretty sure she's part of it, but what scares me is that no such batch exists and any flaws in my LTR (which all LTR's have) will just be used against me by some punk looking to fuck.

In fact if she finds her Knight in Shining Armor in some other guy, I wouldn't even be that upset, I would be happy for her because I want her to be happy, but the idea that she can be emotionally manipulated is just scary. It's good to know that if I keep her satisfied I won't have to worry about that...right?

bro you need to pick up your self confidence, thats the main thing, if your confident in the relationship then it will show and if you think someone is trying to throw bf destroyer to you, the best thing is to mirror and morph, what i mean by that, use their lines against them....like when a guy says something along the lines of "this is your bf, he must be perfect for ya" id mirror and morph something like "naw bro not perfect, just enough to keep her happy enough to show me that gorgeous smile" you will get a smile from your girl, thats when you start focusin on her, keep charmin your girl with every bf destoyer line he throws at you, i have had guys try, and if you can just get your girl to smile with ever rebuttle and get eyecontact from her, your golden man, but then again im the kind of guy that doesnt worry about someone takin my girl, i have the confidence and everything else to keep my girl comin back for more...even bringin other girls into the bedroom per my request....thats another story

good luck bro

clutch

I really don't think you have anything to worry about bro, you seem like a good boyfriend and you guys seem to have a really good relationship. Don't worry about being a good PUA at this point because you already have the girl, eventually every one has got to leave the game, you don't want to be that single 55 year old PUA, they creep me out and everyone around me. The only thing I would do is openly communicate your concerns with her and show her that you trust her. No boyfriend destroyer would be able to beat that.

Um, I forgot to mention one problem --

the relationship has gone long distance.

She and I go to separate colleges, we started dating at the beginning of the summer. We weren't even sure it would last past the summer.

So far she's told me that I still give her butterflies over the internet, etc lol.

I think I'm doing a pretty good job...

dude why you here? you dont want pua help? and not going to take our advice you just want to be comfortable and stick with one girl for a long time and hope to not get hurt..... and have a ltr ldr (long term relationship and long distance relationship) then i think you maybe in the wrong place however, maybe the right in terms of realisations and awareness of yourself. i really think you are too serious with her, your not getting married are you?

pua aint manipulation. in the slightest. it's knowing yourself and how to handle yourself. if its all about the female in interaction then, shes going tot think you are a pussy. (in terms of sucking up to her)

ALSO you could use pua to your advantage if you decide to take some onboard because it will make you more able to handle shit that is worrying you.

and pua is not just about being able to create relationships and rapport, it's about improving your life and increasing your general lifestyle and success at work and even sports too, it applies everywhere.

anyway back to your topic.

seems all just a bit much. and i've made that mistake myself before. and it never ended well. in the slightest. and i know you'll deny it with all you gott because you are so attached but seriously, open your eyes.

if you here to learn pua, then learn if your hear to be worried about if a pua will sweep your girl off her feet then, chances are your worry (focus) is going to cause a crack in you to make it affect you more, and infact make it more likely to occur cos its on your mind.

really i think you should consider your emotions and situation and see whats best for YOU....

oh and btw... i never said scared of by men, when i say dominant. the dominant man, is a very social man who brings people together naturally because he recognizes that humans work better together and improve chances of survival in numbers.

~sierra~

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I like to hybrid techniques, inner game and methods with my own natural game.

also, tip. please try not to rationalise and justify yourself into fitting things that are said to make you feel better, your only lying to yourself, be honest.

in the midst of deep attraction you can find even slight evidence to make you feel better and look better in your mind (in this case justify if your doing a good job in the relationship in terms of what i said in the first post) in a relationship even though it is still apparent your not actually in tht position hence your posting here.

and if i seems harsh, well.... i'm sorry but it's my honest opinion.

good luck

~sierra~

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I like to hybrid techniques, inner game and methods with my own natural game.