This is my first post so, hey everyone! I'm having issues getting into pickup...firstly i lack the motivation to approach, i'm 17 at college and my social group consists of very shy guys, although i'm generally not shy, i feel that i lack the alpha male company to help motivate me to approach...I don't know how to overcome this issue?

I always think of an excuse as to not approach! And feel really bad when the opportunity passes! I just feel a little uncomfortable just approaching random people, especially on my own! Is there anyway that I can force my self to approach...just to get the first few out of the way, so that i can convince myself its not that bad.

Any Advice would be appreciated...

To be able to win, you first have to accept the possibility that you very well could lose. Reward doesn't come without Risk. I suggest you read a book called "Awaken the Giant Within" by Tony Robbins for inner game issues. Start working out as this will lead to positive thinking about your image as well. Work on your fashion. If you look like shit, chances are you will feel like shit. Clothes DO make the man. Don't worry about your friends. Just worry about yourself and go solo if you think it'll hinder you. Don't talk about it with your friends. Eventually, they'll ask you what you are doing differently.

To get started with some AA issues, you might want to try this following steps. Just be aware that asking a dead end question like "What time is it?" can make it awkward to switch the thread, so you adjust the question.

1) Ask a chick what time it is and say thanks.

2) Ask another chick what time it is and follow with second question.

3) Ask yet another chick what time it is and a second question followed by one last one.

4) Repeat process until you've built into a actual conversation.




The key here is working on your transitioning. It's awkward to go from asking about the time to switching to some DHV story. Hell, transition from asking the time to about a book she might have in hand or some piece of clothing she might have on.

I suggest you read some material on PUA/Body Language/Female Sexuality to help you get the insight of it all.

Hi PickUpGuy,

Welcom to the forum! First of all, do you REALLY want this? Don't take it wrong, but if you're lacking motivation why should you do this?

Anyway, I think that it isn't the lack of motivation but rather approach anxiety. I struggle with it myself, although it's decreasing rapidly SPAM.

I kinda see myself in you. when I was 12-16 I had very shy friends, till the moment I got really sick of it. I went on with my life and got new friends, including 'popular guys' (I hate that word lol) . It was live changing. Don't worry about you're old friend, the really good friends will follow you.

About clothes, I wanna second saqchek. Clothes really do make the man. Also this is a really easy thing to fix, it's much easier to buy some nice clothes than to approach a girl and get her attracted (if you're an AFC). So ask for help, read fashion magazines and try to find out wich colors match you. That one is really important.

The one thing that's helping me a lot to keep on improving myself is by making a diary. Not a diary like 'dear diary today was awful i hate myself' but one that's only focus is about PU. It has a lot of advantages. You will see you're improvement easier and it helps to keep you motivated. I'm always really frustrated if I have nothing to write about that day.

Good luck with your path and if you're having questions: shoot. We're all here to learn.

you must know that approach is not big deal.

if u dont approach now u will never approach.

_________________
" You see her , you want her , GET HER "

Thanks for the replies! I took saqcek's advice and approached a girl just to ask fo the time, which to be honest seemed easy enough, although i didn't follow up with a second question, but at least its a start. I'm always complimented by girls i hang around with regarding my dress sense so i don't think that it's too much of a problem. I really do want to change and think my problems are probably due to AA. The idea of writing a diary is a good idea which i may pursue . I think that i'm probably going to either try to follow up with a second question next or try on opinion opener as it is more open ended when i get the opportunity.

The key to this is making this seem like a normal conversation. Most people run through routines as if they were rehearsed or being forced. In fact, a PUA I was out with the other night got called on it. She simply asked if this was something he memorized or rehearsed. Women can pick up on those sort of things. Granted my friend was sick and shouldn't have been out sarging anyways. If you are in a bad mood or sick, don't bother sarging. It'll kill your body language and your ability to operate. You want to be in a positive mood going into the sets, and even talk to buddies or other people randomly before going out. It helps to get warmed up prior to sarging.