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(even though I am very aware of it and actively think about it with every move I take with girls)
Being desperate doesn't take place in action; desperation is all a reflection of the vibe you are giving off to a woman. The energy you are sub communicating and if you're consciously thinking about every move thats another clear sign of desperation. There is no need to impress with anything other than the audacity and boldness you had to approach the women the way you did and begin conversation. I've never been into doing magic tricks and bending over backwards to get a girl to like me. I'm not a performer, I'm an attractive male offering emotional and attractive conversation. Take it - go on this emotional journey with me, or leave it and resume the life you were living before me.
The root of my audacity is the fact that to the core of my being I believe I possess something that everyone needs in their lives. Every woman, every man. I have the ability to transform the life of anyone that crosses my path.. and maybe I don't, but I believe that I do and thats what makes me attractive.
Your desperation is all a result of the core beliefs you have about yourself. How worthy you feel your contribution to social interactions to be. A man thats feels talented and worthless will never get out there and make any impact on the world because to his core he doesn't believe that he has anything to offer the world. And a man that believes he is of low value and women don't NEED him in their lives will not have much drive to get out there and approach any of them.
Even this post here.. You asked for videos and books, but I believe that I could write you a post an completely change your outlook on how you feel about desperation - which can trigger a drive to make a change. Will it change your life? Maybe. Maybe not? But I believe I have the ability to, and thats whats driving me to jock away at this keyboard.
Desperation is all a mindset. And the way you change a mindset is to fill it with new information that is the opposite of the current state that it is in. For example: What do you look up on search engines? A needy desperate guy searches, " Why do women think I'm so desperate? " - And what he will get in return is a bunch of information to back up and reinforce the reason he is viewed as desperate. An attractive man or a man that wants to be attractive thinks and searches " Guide to being completely awesome and having a life of abundance " - And he will run into information that will back that statement. So long as you search what you are and ask questions about what you are you will stay that way. You want to change? Begin asking questions about that which you want to be. That'll help you get there.
Our thoughts become our words, our words become our actions, our actions become our habits and our habits become our destiny.
You thought yourself into your situation and you can think yourself out of it. Put energy and thought into your change, the more you put in the more you get out. Saying to yourself in the mirror " I am the greatest thing that has ever happened to this universe" a thousand times isn't half as affective as taking a paper and writing it down it thousand times. Change isn't going to come over night nor will it come from reading all day. Take active steps in making a change in your life. You must DO something.
Its like getting in shape.. If you want to get a 6 pack you have to exercise, eat right, drink water etc. consistently for 3-6 months to get one. And depending on your physical shape when you started, it maybe longer than that. So you have to ask yourself what is your emotional condition. Are you 300 pounds emotionally trying to get down to 150. Or are you 180 pounds emotionally trying to get down to 150. Your emotional weight will impact the length of time you will have to actively contribute to your change ( Thinking new thoughts, reading new information, writing it on paper, saying it in the mirror, praying about it, meditating on it, etc. etc.)
Work for the change you want and understand that it's possible that it may take a few years for you to get there. This is the microwave age, but no sustaining change comes without dedication and consistency.
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