Matched this girl on tinder. Started talking, i wasnt really attracted to her looks, or her social life or activities, but figured id give it a shot as i like all the experience i can get. Went out to a restuarant for our first date, she was really into me, giggled at everything i said, experessed that she would really like to see me again, and we set up a date for dinner and wine at her place a week after the date. 3 hours after the first date she texted me "sorry, im breaking the 3-day rule, but i really had a good time with you and wanted to thank you for dinner and company". We texted a little back and forth and exchanged snapchat during the days till our second date. She wrote stuff like "you should have been here now, this view is crazy" and "im so looking forward to see you again"

So our second date comes along, I cook her a great chicken dinner at her place. We have wine, watch a movie and she cuddle up on me the whole time. Still really feeling she is more into me than I am. At around midnight we go to bed, end up having sex, sleeping and sex in the morning again. Still feels like she is really into me. We have breakfast and I got to leave as im going with my family to our family cabin for easter. Kinda akward goodbye as she goes for a hug and me for a kiss, but else from that the nothing weird happening on the date. Gut feeling is that this was going good. At the cabin i decide to text her. Its then like 6 hours since we saw each other and I text her "my turn to break the 3-day-rule, had a really nice 2nd date with you, chicken and your princess-stuff" (internal joke between us about her being a spoiled princess). she replied the next day "hehe, yeah it was nice:) have fun at the cabin with beer and mountaineering!". I sent maybe 4 snaps trough easter but she only sent one, allthough she uploaded quite a few to mystory, so i just figured she had a good time and didnt think about it.

Back home sunday night i write her "Hope you had a nice vacation. You know i still got another week off and i need to head to your town this week to pick up some stuff for my new appartment at IKEA, we should do something then?". Been two days now since and she havent responded to my message. I tried to send a cassual snap today and she havent even opened it, been 7 hours, and I can see her snap score change, so she is obviously active on snap. Really dont get why I'm being ignored, and it bothers me. This is not a case of oneitis or a girl i need to see again, but for my own personal "growth" I'd at least would like to know what i did wrong.

A few things i can think of, but dont know if its enough to scare a girl away like that:
1)Ive gained a little weight since my pictures on tinder, six pack is gone and Ive got a small pot belly, still muscular etc though, and it will all be back for the summer. She saw me in real life on the first date so i dont think that can be the reason. (allthough you cant really see that i gained weight tru my tshirt).

2)Ive fooled around with her best friend. Totally random, i met her best friend that live an hour from me on a trip a year ago and we fooled around and been keeping contact casually flirting since then. Random that i met this girl on tinder now and i didnt know they were best friends till i saw her commenting on the other girls post on facebook.

3)I was kinda dominating in bed and even went for anal, but she stopped me. Done this with girls before and it didnt seem to bother them. Think this might have scared her? we did have sex the morning after non the less, and she initated it then.

4)For me the sex wasnt really good, she was kinda akward in positions etc. She kept saying stuff like "omg, im so wet" or "you make me so horny", so i guess she liked it. I didnt even come, and we stopped cause her legs got tired.


5)I believe i might be the first guy she have sex with since her Ex like 12 months ago, so maybe some kinda late rebound?


6)In general it dont take much for me to feel relaxed with women, so i can easily be cuddly etc fast. Could this be too much?


Thinking of sending this message to her tomorrow evening if i dont hear from her again:

"Had a good time with you, and had the feeling it was mutual. I just might be bad at "taking a hint" or just be misunderstanding something here, but I'd find it fair of you to tell me in that case:) By no means do i want to stress anything here, and if youre not interested or feel like seeing each other again, then thats fine, just tell me and we dont need to do this:)"

Trying to figure out a girl is like having a bad case of OCD

I didn't get around to reading his post, but 90% of these post are usually the same. You can scroll through a couple pages on the forums and find 10 post completely identical to this one with the same advice being given.

What I will tell you is.. If you send that text message, you immediately will go into the friend zone(if you aren't already in it) , and/or will never see or hear from the girl again.

The game is all patience, you have to know how to take one step back to take two steps forward. Stop pushing it. I know this is the microwave, but if the seduction doesn't take place in the moment you have to learn to calibrate with all this new technology. Make the right moves at the right times; the fact that you're being so pushy on this post is a complete reflection of why she was pushed away. You pushed her away, and now you want to push her further by contacting again? What sense is pushing a door with a big ass sign that says " PULL" on it? If you're hitting a nail into a piece of wood and it bends, do you continue to hammer the bent nail? Expecting it to magically straighten itself? NO. you pull it back out and try again. But sometimes the nail gets so messed up that you have to get a new one.

This girl isn't somewhere make post about you on a forum so why are you making post about her? You're swimming up stream and if you don't learn to be patient until the tide changes you'll find yourself in this situation over and over with women you like until you're frustrated. She doesn't owe you and explanation because she isn't the reason she doesn't want to interact at this moment, you are.

Chill man. Let the shit come to you. And if it doesn't you can try again in a week or just accept the fact that you didn't properly lay down your game.

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If you genuinely don't care if you see her again and it's not a oneitis then why not just let it go?

Why would you need closure? As someone else says on here : Closure is for bitches.

I say just leave it for now and I guarantee she will get back in contact with you. She might just be playing hard to get? Waiting for a text like that from you that will give her all the power. Please don't send that text.

i am kind of in a situation like this at the moment, everything inside my head makes me want to logically sort something out with a girl I am seeing. Women aren't logical. Asking for answers will get you nowhere, although it feels like the right thing to do.

I say play it cool, man. It's only been a couple of days. If she doesn't get back to you then well IT'S HER LOSS.... right? Try and get into that mindframe.

Okay, Ill wait a week, before contacting again, then. If i dont get a reply within a week, ill send her a short message playing on the princess thing or something casual to see if she replies. Just find it weird, ive dated 16 girls over the last year, counting this one, and none of the other girls have been as into me as this one. And even though none of the others ended in more than sex, none ignored me, and i never ignored the ones i didnt feel like seeing again either.

What do i do if she contacts me with a casual snap or something, keep ignoring till she gives me something to actually respond to?

Thats cool. And you can't force her to be interested in you if she currently isn't. The past is irrelevant, the 16 girls, the weeks before, the things she said, its all irrelevant. Women are responding to the nature of the moment. Nothing they say emotionally means anything outside of the moment they say it. Guys make the mistake of letting there guards down when a woman says something like " I love you" - without realizing that she was saying " I love you" to the guy you were being in that moment. Therefore if you allow her saying " I love you" to change you in ANY way, you are no longer the guy she loves. You have become a new guy that was affected by her words. You are currently not the guy that she was SUPER into, you have become a new guy that posts on forums about her and send her desperate text messages. Those feelings she felt was for the guy that wouldn't do that. Now you're someone else, and she's treating you like the stranger you're acting like.

Just patient, don't worry about what to say. Take it as it comes.. And Im only saying wait a week because thats the average amount of time it takes for a man as emotional as you to center himself. It could be longer or shorter; its all a reflection of how long you'll take to "let her go" from within.

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following your plan. actually got a snap now. First i hear from her since saturday morning. picture of her on a spinningbike with the text "vacation is over!". Just ignore it and wait for her to take initative to a conversation or doing something?

Just like I heard James Marshall say once "It's okay for a seduction to span out for months or years, as long as that is not the only seduction taking place at one time".

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PUA Maxim: Leave the woman better than you found her.