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PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:36 pm 
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This is gonna be a long post, but I need your help.

Read about another user specifically opened an account for a girl - that's exactly what I just did. Except that I did it partly for myself. This girl is just so confusing that I feel like I cannot waste anymore time with her. I want to get this clear so I really appreciate all the help from you guys here.

Myself: a college noob, I would definitely not describe my game as 'solid', I can easily attract girls, but always fail to put things through seduction stage
Her: A polish HB9, 4 years older than me, has the best body, but she doesn't seem that she has been fully utilising her sexual power. Not much make-up on (still pretty, imagine that), laughs a lot (don't know if she's originally like that or only with me). has a 'boyfriend', mentioned once or twice casually, don't know who and where is he, did't ask.
Setting: she sent me a couch-surfing request and I hosted her for 2 nights a few weeks ago, before she went to another city to work as a carer. Now she's coming back and ask if she can stay with me for another 4 nights.

So as you can see the underlying frame is already not in my favour - more like friendship-wise at the very beginning.
She slept on air mattress for the 2 nights I hosted her, nothing happened. First night: we talked a lot, about some of my DHV travelling, our childhoods and a lot of bullshits. She was very fun so it was really fun just to talk with her. She laughed so so much (so did I) thus it felt like the sexual vibe was kind of being 'laughed off'. Second night: We continued to have fun. I kino a lot more, she never really resisted or showed any sign she did not want me to touch her. I also put a lot sexual innuendo in our conversation and she always laughed. We ended up cuddling while watching a movie on my bed. She did not wear bra after shower so i could totally feel her boobs, and she def knew it, don't think she was trying to seduce me though, probably it's just she didn't care. The vibe was still not sexual enough for me to initiate a kiss. She had to sleep earlier because she had to leave very early the next morning. So another fruitless night.

After she left, in these few weeks, we have been exchanging texts. She's never missed a single text and I'm always to one to stop texting. And she puts a lot of smiles (:P / :D/ ^^). But another thing is she never initiated a text conversation. It has always been me to start, even if I once froze her for a week. We texted about funny stories happened to us, about having 11 children together in the future, some ridiculous bullshit... all in all, more rapport. I tried many times to lead the conversation to sexual, but she just did not follow, She will only respond a few words directly to my innuendo, then either laugh it off (again) or try to switch the topic. I guess I'm just not very good at doing this. Once we were talking about her laughing so often, i asked if she laughs even when having sex (I was genuinely curious), then she waited a bit longer than she usually did before texting back:"You need to ask my boyfriend, I'm not fully conscious to realise what's going on with me then:D". I totally ignored the boyfriend part and smoothly direct the conversation to something less sexual, because I felt like she was still not very comfortable with that. Possibility 1: she doesn't consider me as a potential sexual partner; Possibility 2: she doesn't want to appear as a slut, because she has a 'boyfriend'.

Now she is asking me to host her again when she finishes her work at that city and comes back (like 2 weeks later), making me wonder if she has been being 'nice' to me this whole time just for another 4 nights of 'free accommodation'? I always feel so frustrated trying to push things sexual with her and I start to doubt she will ever want to fuck me. Of course I can just treat her as another friend and have fun with her, but I don't really want to waste that time because I'm having exams later and this month is really not supposed to be the time for me to 'socialise'. If I wanted friendship here I would do it after exams. Hosting her means I want to get something back (e.g. sex). How can I know if she's DTF or not. And what do you guys think?


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 6:48 pm 
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Location: Toronto, Canada
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How can I know if she's DTF or not. And what do you guys think?
Variations of this question show up on the forum every day. "I don't want to make a move because I don't know if she likes me!"

The answer is consistently: ESCALATE and find out. Escalation will get you your answer.

Don't make excuses about 'what if I damage the friendship' - cause let's be honest... she's using you as a motel... there's no real friendship here, apart from some quasi flirting and a bit of potential for sex.

While you were 'cuddling' with her and watching movies, and she wasn't wearing a bra - THAT is when you missed the opportunity to escalate and push things further.


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 7:10 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
How can I know if she's DTF or not. And what do you guys think?
Variations of this question show up on the forum every day. "I don't want to make a move because I don't know if she likes me!"

The answer is consistently: ESCALATE and find out. Escalation will get you your answer.

Don't make excuses about 'what if I damage the friendship' - cause let's be honest... she's using you as a motel... there's no real friendship here, apart from some quasi flirting and a bit of potential for sex.

While you were 'cuddling' with her and watching movies, and she wasn't wearing a bra - THAT is when you missed the opportunity to escalate and push things further.
So do you think I should still host her and tries to escalate more? What I am thinking is that by hosting her I appear as doing her some favour, which sounds too AFC doesn't?


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PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 7:11 pm 
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Yes I think you should host her. Have another movie night with some drinks... And escalate.

Due to the nature of your current relationship with her that's probably your best bet... Asking her on a date would just seem unnatural.


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