This little situation is about my gf and I, and I need some straight black and white who's right who's wrong and what to do's. In the beginning of our relationship (1 and a half years together) i was extremely insecure, and would secretly go through her things -- read her journal, went through her phone ect. When I told her about this, naturally she was upset and since then I've really had to find it in me to accept and trust her. Fast-forward to yesterday, Im sitting in her car waiting for her as she goes into a gas station. I grabbed her phone to put on a song from youtube, when all of the sudden she appears out of nowhere like a fucking genie and catches me with her phone. She snatches it and assumes that i was going through her stuff, mind you 'youtube' is still open. She comes back in and i tell her what was actually going on. She doesnt believe me, all hell breaks loose, and the downward spiral keeps spiraling downward. Eventually it gets to the point where she wants me to apologize and 'understand why she would think i was going through her things', but in anger i refused to acknowledge i did anything wrong. Why would I? I was wrongly accused and was now being reprimanded for doing nothing wrong. By the end of it all, she dropped me off at a bus stop and Im bussing home fuming at what just happened. A day later and we havent talked, so I need some advice here, on who's right, and what I should do? Maintain radio silence? Call her? This throws me off and I dont want my ego dictating my judgement.

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Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today - JD

I used to be like this as well. And then I learned that a woman will only do anything wrong toward you if she thinks that she can get away with it. Whether it be by you being too insensitive to notice her behavior changes to find out or whether she knows that you'll probably take her back.

I would say a part of you picked up her phone because you wanted to go through it(not that you were) and she happened to catch you due to her own female intuition. She picked up on the vibe in the air. And its not like you haven't done this many times before. Reputation is everything. So many people that earn a bad reputation suffer consequences for things they haven't done. So being that you have already established a reputation, you have to be more responsible with how you move up until you've earned a level of trust back in which she feels safe allowing you to pick up her phone when she's not around.

All in all though, you have to trust your gut bro. If you have to behave the way you're thinking and behaving you have to question whether or not you're ready to get into a relationship. Because no girl is going to remain faithful to a guy that is expecting her not to be. You're sub communicating to her that you don't know whether or not you're the best thing for her. So if you're not trusting her she'll begin to wonder why and feel as if maybe you shouldn't.

So yes. you're wrong. Not for the action, but for the reputation you've built for yourself. And for reacting emotionally when she accused you. If you would of stayed calm and in control and said " Look baby, I know I was doing this in the past, but I was honestly just changing the song. Thats it. Theres nothing else to talk about " you wouldn't be in this situation.

A woman doesn't need her man to react on emotion and FUME up the way you did; so you're wrong for that as well. You must be her rock that she can lean on. And she can lean on anything that develops emotions the same way she does. Copy?

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You hit the nail on the head my friend! Thank you, I'll pm you with something I need your take on, youve always given good advice before.

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Dream as if you'll live forever, Live as if you'll die today - JD