Good evening, so firstly I'm fairly new to this site and I want to be able to make the most of it and any help you can offer me.

2 issues I have, 1 is the approach, been trying endlessly to will myself to talk to girls, struggling at best. Wondering if there's any inner game material someone can perhaps refer me to? I want to be completely natural with my pick up. Help would be absolutely fantastic!

2nd issue, I'm in a bar for a friends birthday, so women are there and talking to women here in this scenario isn't so much of a problem, the problem I found was I just became useless at making conversation! Just couldn't talk to anyone about anything for longer than a sentence, I'd then run out of things to say and have to think oif something - AWKWARD! So again, anything that I can use to help myself with these situations?

Any help I would be truly grateful for.

Honestly, instead of memorizing openers dqs or reading iois ... It's a lot to remember! So instead of overloading yourself with a bunch of tasks, take steps to get there. You cant just jump a 30 foot tall stair case, you have to climb it.

Approaching women comes with that annoying nervous ache in your stomach. Everyone has that shit and It wont go away. Put that aside and think about nike's quote " just do it " you will have a 70% chance of the woman responding well if you approach her. But you will have a 0% chance if you don't.

So i'll just be straight up with what you should do.

Find any woman (alone, with friends, with a bunch of guys, etc.) approach her with a smile and tell her something completely ridiculous. It could be anything from an opinion " I like my men like I like my coffee" and wink at her jokingly. Or if shes a really hb (hot babe) you want to use more disqualifiers. Walk over to her and ask her out of the blue "what's the craziest thing you have ever done?" no matter what she says say " wow you and my grandma would get along great!"

Anyway ... say anything. Seriously go to a bar, but try to be not too rude or she'll negatively react obviously.


As for keeping a conversation going... honestly pay attention to what she's saying. A good tip to follow is to look at her sentences in your head when shes saying them. For example if she says. "Yea the craziest thing I ever did was skydive. It was so scary!"

Now look at the sentence

"Yea the craziest thing I ever did was skydive, It was so scary! ( I highlighted "Craziest" "SKydive" and "scary")
^ ^ ^

If you look, i'm pointing arrows to the nouns pretty much. Now when you pick out words like that, bring up something upon those that relates to the nouns such as "Are you afraid of heights?" or "I've always wanted to do it! where did you skydive?"


Once you master this, you can move on to more sophisticated approaches and techniques.

Anyway,

Starkz

1) Inner game won't help you. Need to create a behavior that makes you approach more. Do that by approaching more again and again and again.
2) Things to talk about: Activities, hobbies, interests for starters. Shouldn't focus on that much in first part of interaction. Instead, BREAK RAPPORT (See categories of breaks in rapport here: link removed by moderator for violation of the forum rules

Also, saying "Why's that?" "How so?" and "Tell me More" will do wonders for the depth of the conversation once things are moving conversationally.

_________________
Chris
Dating Strategist
https://structureofdating.com/

Inner 'game' is everything. If you work on yourself, and are grounded TO yourself, approaching is nothing. Rejection is nothing. Why? You're not outcome dependent. You don't need external validation to feel that you're of any worth, you just know you are - you derive that energy from within yourself.

INNER GAME IS IMPORTANT

It's DAMN important. It's who you are. You should constantly be working on it. That's why the entire first month of my Seductive Introvert training program is so focused on Inner Game.

So, you're right to want to work on your Inner Game. It's directly connected to your NATURAL GAME.

However, you shouldn't get so caught up in trying to get inner game that you use it as an excuse not to practice outer game, too.

You should constantly be working on your Outer Game as well.

When it comes to conversations, it's EASY to keep it flowing if you use a combination of active listening and curiosity. Instead of trying to figure out technical details like every other guy does, try to find out her values and motivations. Dig deeper.

Thanks for feedback. It pisses me off because I'm not shy! So I've been asking girls for the time for now, it is literally all I can force myself to do. I spend each day thinking about how best to overcome the approach issue. I appreciate it's not about lines or routines and I wouldn't want to find myself doing so, it would feel awkward and weird! Also I day game.

Off subject and I hope this is the place to ask for this, I live in the UK, south coast of England. I would love to take some sort of bootcamp, are there any recommended or can anyone point me in the general direction?

Thanks for feedback, appreciated.

South coast represent!

Where abouts are you from? I'm Bournemouth.
If you're local would be great to meet up with you.

Yes bro! I will pm you