| Irrational behavior is only that behavior to which you don't understand (the motivation behind).
With experience and some of the PU frames on women's behaviors you'll in all likelihood find them to be less mystical creatures.
Women, generally, are more attuned to the subtleties of emotional changes both within others and internally. They seem to be erratic at times (which is also a notion put forth by psychoanalytic theorists, particularly Freud who felt that all women were predisposed to hysteria until they had a male baby of their own - in which case that'd be the closest they got to having their own penis). But I digress...
Don't be intimidated by behavior you've yet to understand. Instead, go into it as the curious observer, or scientists - be aware of all your preconceived notions as much as you can be (biases included) and challenge those when they are no longer serving you. If not, the fog these produce for you will obscure your ability to read women better.
Remember, at the end of the day we all want the same thing, we all have the same needs (love, safety, security, autonomy, creativity, freedom to express one's self etc etc etc) irrespective of gender and culture. A woman's needs, just like our own, may change from moment to moment. They sub communicate A LOT, whereas most guys speak on a more surface and direct level.
That said, learn how to attenuate, or turn down the volume with people. Look BEYOND the surface, beyond what they're verbalizing and instead look at the behavior, particularly patterns of behavior and what need or needs aren't being met. This does take a lot of practice, but the key thing for now is to try to understand the "why" (the origins of the behavior) less so the "what" (the content/what is being said).
Why do you think women respond so much better to ACTS of love rather than overtly telling her "I love you"? Learn to say what you want to say to a woman without saying it directly:) Better yet, once you understand her patterns and respond accordingly she'll fall in love with you even deeper "he just gets me! OMG!" <--is what she'll gleefully be sharing w her friends at dinner.
With respect to your self-esteem, if you're looking outwardly for validation especially from women you're building your house on sand. Guys will tell you therefore to work on your 'inner game' which is a lazy term for building a strong sense of self, one that's internally focused rather than predicated on external validation.
Many roads to doing this, no one better than the other and feel free to do them all. Find hobbies, things you can do yourself that make you feel good about YOU for no other reason than that - or actively pursue the hobbies you may already have. Get in touch with your spiritual side, yu can do this through nature walks (leave your phone at home or any thing else that'll distract you from nature), meditation (e.g. mindfulness meditations you can find loads online), journalling, yoga, basically something you can do that helps connect you to yourself. Also you may want to look into giving back, helping somebody else maybe as a big brother/mentor role or volunteering for some cause - often we feel good about ourselves and are at our best when we're helping others.
So you see there are many ways of connecting to one's self, and this by no means is an exhaustive list. Once you do this consistently you'll find you can feed and nurture your own soul, you'll be far less likely to be bothered by people's acceptance or lack of acceptance of you. And this to mean is building a truly Alpha persona. It's the diff between being responsive and reactive, between living in abundance out of love and wilting by living in FEAR never truly realizing your full potential, in other words live in scarcity.
|
CHAT
