Girl from my class. Friendzoned, but she has given some IOI. Been gaming since October and so far this is how it went:

Asked her to be my +1 on a friend's birthday dinner. She flaked but had a valid excuse.

Then she hinted at something she would like to do and I was the one who couldn't.

Next week I asked her to dinner. It went terrible on my part, like "Hey, you wanna go have dinner at the mall later?" she "Why?" me "Don't feel like cooking and it is boring if I go alone. Text me if you wanna do it". She never did, and the whole thing sounded forced on my side.

Some time later she texted "Bored, wanna go out". I only saw the text hours later, when I really didn't feel like going out, so I gave her a taste of her own medicine and just replyed "And I'm out partying" and left it to that.

Next weekend I was the one who asked her out. Poor planing on my part and didn't show dominance. She wanted to go with other girl, the other girl was not up to it, she flaked on a 1:1. Maybe she was afraid of me...

About some two weeks later we were at a class lunch at college. When it ended I asked her for a coffee as we were walking to our cars, she said she was tired.

Some time later she asked if I wanted to go to some club. I had to get up early, hate clubbing (especially that specific kind of club) and gaming at clubs with a group is not easy, so I flaked.

Then, early last week I asked her for a Christmas carnival at my town. Something like "hey, have you been to the carnival?" "no, not yet" "I have some business in town tomorrow and want to check it out after. Feel free to tag along". She said she had seen it on TV and it did not look like much.

Right now I'm just mentioning stuff I've done or will be doing to see if something peaks her interest, like "went to see that show last weekend. You gotta see it".

Also, I DID manage to go out with her once. Early in the flake chain a mutual friend hooked us up with tickets to some concert. The show was rubbish, but I did some kino (wich she was cool with), didn't close because of insecurity and inexperience on my part, had to push some drunkard who was ramming her in the concert, wich was manly, and arranged transportation to and from the concert.

Any thoughts? And don't just say "next her", I'll have to see her dayly for the next 6 months, so it's not like I'm wasting time or don't have other girls to game. Been trying to freeze, but It's hard since we see every day.

How many! It seems like the reason she didnt accepted the other calls isnt really your first (as you said,strange) try, but your 2nd flake. She may have lost her patience. You should sarge more her at class, and attempt to turn the situation back to your waters there (more confort to regain what you had), and some intense escalation to get out of that Friendzone (in the right time), because she probably may call you for nothing anymore in the current situation, and possibly flake yours. Friendzones are a mess to turn back, its hard to her start seeing you with other eyes, especially when the HB is pissed off. OR you have the alternative to stop calling and act normally with her, not sarging anymore (this may draw her attention if she considers you and may start some initiative, but you already said that you dont want it).

I would let this sarge in the background, start other games, dont abandon it, some kind of surprise may appear if you are able to handle multiple sarging at your school (not many at your class though, i done that in the past, its terrible) and create preselection (you can use it speaking to her about your closes, as she may do the same to you if she is your friend someday), especially if you get nice KCs with hot HBs. And dont feel ashamed for not having closed her at the right opportunity, its hesitation. We often miss chances.

All I'll say is it happens man... Sometimes people are busy/don't like you or the girl might be trying test you to see if you'll turn into a needy chode.

So both of you are on a flake competition. I see nothing but revenge in this post. She flakes on you, then you flake on her, then she does, and so on...

If you want girls, including this one, you can't be lazy. You have to go out and work your ass because that's what I've learned. Sitting at home won't get you laid everyday, but going out will.

I'd vote for freezing a bit. Be casual when you see her face to face, but just calm down on the "going out" thing. When you feel it's the right time, tell her you would like her to go out with you today and that you have a surprise for her. Just plan something amazing, not fancy or expensive, just good enough so both of you have fun.

Good luck

Thank you all.

As I said, this is a kind of step forward/step back situation.

She sends very mixed signals, talked about her ex's (wich indicates friendzone) but sends some ioi's, like wanting my attention in a group setting, sitting next to me, etc.

Also, two things that did not work in my favour: First, very early on our interaction she turned me into her therapist. I had known her for about two weeks when her best friend of years long made her something very bad, and she turned to me for suppot. I know it was a mistake, but when she came to me in tears what was I supposed to say? "Take it to someone who cares"?

Second, I tried the "introduce sexual talk" thing and took it a bit too far, sounding kinda sleezy. It made things awkward for a few days, drove her away, but it turned out better than I expected, so now although I am forgiven (she said, and i quote, "I have a temper but may forgive things only from people I really like", wich is a good sign) I still have some way to go to regain her trust.

Now, as I said, my plan with this one is to reduce contact (since I can't fully freeze), sarge other girls to DHV (if possible, ask for her opinion, since we're friends and all) and sometimes mention intersting stuff I'll do/have done to see if it peaks her interest, because I have a clear feeling she was interested and things did not happen due to initial insecurity from my side.

For example, just today I called a group hangout with my friends from outside college to play paintball, and asked for her help on "how do I create a facebook event", just to make sure she knows the fun stuff I'm up to and the cool social cirle I have.

New chance and possibally a new flake. The same mutual friend put us both on the guest list to a party. We were both down to it. But now our friend says she can't go. Because of that my target is more inclined to hang with her regular friends and I sure as hell won't go without knowing anyone there. As my target has put it "if we all go, fine. If she can't that's too bad".

Going alone with her would serve my interests better, but I am not going to beg for a date. But I am also not missing a chance due to some twisted sense of pride.

How does this sound: "I'm not even going to say we could go just the two of us because you'll leave me hanging again. But if you want, I'm down for it." It puts her in the hot seat and make her feel bad about flaking. Is this good or what?

Edit: what if I mention something in the likes of "just hang as friends, no strings attached"?