I want to pick up girls, but I don't want to go to bars/clubs, what book or video course are good for me?

honestly of course I'm gonna recommend the one in my signature...


but check out my post to find out places other the the bar or club. best-places-to-meet-women-vt172817.html <-- click here

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Why don't you want to go to bars or clubs? Are you allergic to people having fun?

I can actually relate to him. Im not a big fan of bars and clubs either. I can only speak for myself but the reasons i personally dont like it:
-Its loud most of the time. You need to scream and a basic conversation is nearly impossible.
-Girls go there with friends which often makes it difficult to approach and get to know her
-Often people get drunk and mess around like kids which in my personal opinion is no fun at all!
-Girls know they´re going to be approached so bitch shield is up like a motherfucker

This is only my opinion and thats the case where i live. Maybe its different where you at. But i prefer approaching in a chilled and neutral place during the day.

Get physical. "Shit it's loud in here. Come outside with me so I can hear you."... Isolate.
Get the girl away from her friends or get her friends to like you

"Hey, I'm gonna borrow your friend for 2 seconds."
Yes. People go out to let loose and have fun... There's no reason anyone is too "old" or "mature" for having some fun. If you're just a tight ass... That's a different story. People at bars won't like you if you're a tight ass.
Actually, if you're a cool, normal guy who's just out having fun... most girls are pretty open to meeting new people. Sure, there are some girls/guys that won't want to talk to you... but that's part of it. Develop some resilience and get out there and take the emotional beating. It's fun.

Why don't I like to go to bars/clubs?
1. Too loud, you try to speak something, but people can't hear what you say. I also feel the loud sound is beating my body.When I sleep after going to a club, I can feel a buzzing in my ears.
2. Smoky. People smoke, I don't like a smoky environment, I don't like girls who smoke.
3. I don't like to stay too late. If I go to bars/clubs, I will have to stay very late. Then the next day will be ruined.
4. In my country, few normal(having a normal job) girls go to clubs/bars.

Get physical. "Shit it's loud in here. Come outside with me so I can hear you."... Isolate.


A girl will not go outside with you if you have not attracted her. In order to attract her, you have to talk to her and she has to be able to hear what you say.

It is true that girls in a bar/club are more open, but generally speaking, they are more nasty and easy, they may have had sex with many guys before you.

I don't get it, you say you want to pick up girls i.e. multiple partners, and then hate on girls who have had multiple partners.

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If something's not fun, it's not worth doing

So when you speak... get closer. Use it as an excuse to get closer. You eventually get used to the loud noise. The "buzzing" in your ears is because you aren't used to the loud music. Also, when it gets to a point where the loud noise is starting to bother you, take a step outside or to somewhere that it's more quiet. Give yourself a break. I tend to step outside atleast every 30 minutes to an hour and chill out for a minute. Use the time to recap what just went down.
So stay away from people who smoke... Again, if you step outside every so often, get a breath of fresh air, you won't be so bothered by it. Or... Go to a place where they don't allow smoking inside.
Dude... I had times where I would work 9 am - 9 pm, go out and pimp it until 4 or 5 am, then work 9am - 9pm again the next day, and then go out and do it again the night after... Then work 8am - 9am. Unless you're a 60 year old man... Energy should not be an issue. Quit being a little pussy about it. The whole "I'm tired" thing only works when you're an old man. Stop making excuses.
Everyone goes to bars. Doctors, teachers, lawyers, strippers, accountants, drug dealers, and gas station attendants... There is no "job" that people work where they don't go out to have fun and blow off some steam.

NOBODY can help you until you decide to stop making up bullshit excuses.

I'm not trying to sound like a dick but thats how it comes across... cause I am a dick.

But.........

A girl does not have to hear you talk in order to be attracted to you. If that's the case... How have I pulled girls and not said more than 4 words?

And just because a girl is at a bar or a club does not mean she's easy or nasty... Shit dude, if you want a girl who's gonna be atleast half way decent in bed and isn't a complete social retard.. You've gotta accept that she's probably taken quite a few dicks before yours. Hate to burst your little reality bubble... But a "virgin who fucks like a pornstar" does NOT exist.

The amount of excuses in this thread is TOO DAMN HIGH.

You want to learn pickup. But you don't want to go to bars and clubs. Pickup breathes in bars and clubs, just as much as it breathes in shopping malls and on the streets.

It's OK. You are afraid. You are uncomfortable there. So you would rather not go. These are your emotions holding you back from growing. The only way forward is to get out of your comfort zone. Experience will be your aid.

A tennis player wants to be good at playing tennis, however he doesn't want to play on clay courts because the ball just bounces too slow for his liking. Will he ever be good? He might be good on other courts, but he will never enter a championship, and honestly, he is lacking in experience.

You can pickup anywhere, sure. However don't shy away from something just because it makes you uncomfortable. Know that the feeling of discomfort in you is only holding you back. If you can dissasociate yourself from that feeling and look at it objectively, you will realize that it is just what it is, a feeling. It is not you, but a feeling within you. You can act against the feeling if you so wish. This means you can do anything you want really. Think about that for a second, you can do anything you want. ANYTHING. The only thing holding you back is fear, fear of the unknown, fear of change. Why don't you try bars and clubs for a good 60 days and then come back and tell us whether or not you like them or not. Stick in it for 60 days and you are forced to either crumble or change, but whatever happens stick with it. See how it goes. You won't die. Nothing bad will happen. The worst that will happen is you might go home and cry a few times because of all the stress or because a girl didn't like you. But try it out.

How about you get your hands dirty for once. You'll learn a lot.

It also depends on what you personally want and like. I dont think a club or a bar is the right location to look for a girl that is supposed to be your next girlfriend (if that is what you are looking for) so imo there are way better places to meet girls and to approach...

No there isn't, you're just making excuses to yourself so you don't have to step outside your comfort zone.

No im not. Im not saying i would NEVER go to a club or a bar to approach!
But most men, when they are looking to meet a woman, will go to a bar, or to a night club. It is simple logic. Women go to these places for the same reason – where else could be better? The answer is:Anywhere! The bar or the night club scene, in my experience, is one of the least effective ways to meet women. This is because the women you come across are often drunk, and sometimes when you later call them, they don’t remember who you were. Plus, if you’ve had a couple drinks yourself, it can have disastrous consequences. These are also not the type of woman that
I am looking for.I don’t drink and party like a rock star. But if you are looking for a woman that is because it is part of your own lifestyle preference, just be aware of the potential pitfalls of drinking and approaching women. It can definitely have its drawbacks.

Obviously, meeting girls in night clubs is not the best place. To top it all off, they usually have their guard up. Most women when they go out, especially when they go out with their girlfriends, are not out to meet a guy. They are going out simply to have fun, dance, drink,and to just get a little crazy.The best way I have found to meet women is at weddings, arts hows, seminars, private parties, social events, malls, grocery stores,trade shows or even at work. If you meet a woman in a more open, public place, whether it’s in a grocery store or somewhere else, she is going to have her guard up vs. meeting through mutual friends at a party, weddings, social events, etc.

Just how i see it...

Re-read Tr@veler's post.