So I went out with a couple buddies to a bar and it was early in the night and we were at a table just drinking and getting settled in. The bar wasn't packed yet but had a decent crowd. I was sitting on a stool and one of my buddies was standing at the table next to his chair.

So this random cute looking girl approaches our table and asks my friend if she could lay her coat at on the table since she was too hot to wear it and didn't want to carry it around. Now she didn't strike up a convo first with us she just asked my friend to basically be her personal coat man. Being the guy that I am I said to her in a not rude manner " does my friend look like the coat man?"


She responded back " You must be the smart ass of the group". I didn't think much of the remark and I was going to respond back to her except that my friend (the coat man) basically threw me under the bus by reacting with a loud "oooooohhhhh" like it was some big burn. I didn't show it but it ticked me off that my homie would side play with some cute random girl who was using him as a coat man. Its like he though was an honor for this girl to hold his coat. By the way he ended up holding for her and she didn't talk with him or anything. He was just a big welcome mat.

My question is how could I have handled my friends reaction better? I felt it wouldn't have been anything if my friend did give the reaction he did. I felt my homie was a buddy fucker for taking some stupid random girls side whom he didn't even get any play from.

That's normal. I don't have these types of friends who put me down, but I'm faced with a lot of situations like this. I was dancing with these 2 girls yesterday and this guy (I barely know him, just a guy I know, not a friend) goes like "You can't even dance with that girl, she's beating your ass". I think his main purpose was to hit on her, but I just grabbed her from her hips and we started grinding (PS: kiss closed the next 5 minutes).

NEVER be affected by anything anyone says to you. You should have just ignored his comment and kept talking to her by telling her something like "Why? Does that bother you?" with a small wink so it comes out as a decent flirt statement. Trust me, your friend will zone himself out because you ignored him and he'll never do it again.

That's what I personally do to guys trying to blow me out of sets.

You tried to puff up your feathers, she called you a faggot and then you fag out over it. Seems like she was right. Your friend saw she was right. Your reaction to the incident proves she was spot on.

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RSDTyler

Agreed, do not act like an ass, your wingman saw you were being an ass and called you out. Also, you could have easily reframed it "why do you like smart asses?", then dropped an IOI to calibrate.

She really didn't say it in a mean way at all. It wasn't that bad she didn't use a mean tone. The only thing that made it bad was my friends reaction. I can handle myself fine it just fucks it up when your friend is giving a girl ammo. I was going to reply but my friend fucked it up by interrupting.

Why don't you just shut the fuck up Simple idiot if you are just gonna hate. I don't take being called a smart ass as an insult because I am a smart ass. I rather be called a smart ass than hold some random girls coat for nothing. This girl wasn't even talking to any of us. That's a move for pussies.

Honestly my friend is always kissing womens asses. We were at a party later that night and this pretty girl was cold and he just willingly gave her his jacket. The girl wasn't flirting with him or anything. If she had signaled some IOI's then it would have been cool.

Just fuck it. Next time I aint saying shit. Let my friend be the coat man and I'm gonna go talk to women while he looks like a spaz holding some girls coat whom he doesn't know.

You can't go out acting cocky funny if you can't take a joke aimed back at you. He didn't throw you under the bus, that was a normal response to the situation. You threw yourself under the bus.

Also your wingman didn't do his duties as a wingman, but you should have reframed the situation better.

I won't say he threw you under the bus but I feel you. A wingman should always be on your side. I've known wingmen who get girl hungry and say stupid shit like that when I'm gaming. It sucks because both you and your wingman look uncool because they're essentially siding with a girl they just met. A good wingman will stick up for you despite anything because then it looks like you guys don't give a fuck.

Also, it's not a big deal to be nice at the bar. She didn't ask him to hold her coat, she asked to place it on the chair. If it were me, and I knew I wouldn't be sitting and it wouldnt bother me, I wouldve done it. If this is a pickup dude, I'd explain to him how this can be counter productive to getting the girl if he wants her. If he's not I won't care. You can't expect pickup thinking from your non pu buddies.

Seriously people?

Most of my previous F-closes were in cases like these. His friend did not know how to take charge of the situation, so he just stepped in and went for it. Try replying as I told you in my previous post and see what happens. HOWEVER, keep in mind that if your friend had a good reply, let him be. Never risk a good friend for some random chick. But that's as far if he knows how to react back to women and close them. Other than that, there's no excuse not to interfere.

Thanks neo and xoved. Glad to see not everyone is a ish talker on here. I was just trying to get some other opinions on what I could have done. Cuz honestly her calling me a smartass was nothing to me. Most of the women I have been with have called me a smartass. I was just asking how I should handle it when my buddy is siding with some random girl who didn't even give him any IOI's.

My friend is lame at talking to women and doesn't know anything about banter. He doesn't know the difference between banter and a burn. @xoved you are right man most women I have closed have called me a smartass like this before. It's really nothing. It just makes me look bad when my friend is on the side of some random girl. I was kind of ticked cuz I was actually standing up for my friend to not be some lame spaz and he gave that girl ammo.

Then you're that uber rare %2 of David D's disciples who actually doesn't flame out spectacularly with women.
Generally speaking, women see reactions like that as a little yappie dog trying too hard to be "badass".
There is a huge difference between calling you this after talking to you for a minute and this being the first thing she says to you.
If this was really "banter" that's not even a problem.

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RSDTyler

smh your friend's an ass for doing that...

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This is legit the dumbest conversation, get over it...