So, quick report. I went to a nice/classy/not depressing/the girls look like they're having fun strip club a week ago or so. I wasn't there to pickup but as a customer. Saw this hottie at the bar, then on stage. I went up to the stage a little late and ended up having to move to the other end after she didn't come up to me the first time. Some nice banter with her. I think I saw her again on the stage and told her to meet me later. This time she gave me the dance without asking for a tip--an indicator that she was into me and obviously not just going for the money... plus she's new. Anyway, I told her to meet me "in my office" and pointed to where I had been sitting. Saw her in a bit. "Hey, you weren't at your office earlier." "Yeah, those four girls are occupying it." "Yeah, what are they doing here?" I had talked to them so told her what they had told me (a little bit of social proof).
She takes me over to this out of the way corner and proceeds to basically rub her breasts in my crotch without even talking about a dance. I tell her what I do for a living and she's genuinely intrigued. She asks me a few questions. We're vibing big time and building some comfort. I'm playing with her hair. I totally would have kissed her right there but that kind of thing is frowned on in strip clubs. She gets called away and is busy most of the rest of the night. I've interacted with enough strippers and enough non-strippers to know when they're gaming me. Plus, she told me that she'd only been working there about a week. She wasn't just interested but SIGNIFICANTLY into me.
Before I leave, before close, I track her down and say that I thought she was interesting and asked for her number. She writes it down for me (I didn't bring my phone in) with a smiley face but her stage name. I go to the bathroom and think twice about it. I go back and she's giving her number to some other customers. "Wow, guys are just asking for your number left and right." She tells me that she gave them some text message service number but that the one she gave me is real. Then I say that she also gave me her stage name. She gives me her real name. I leave and text her.
"[her name], did I get that right?"
"Yeah, you did
"
"Right on!"
30 minutes go by or so
Her: You have a good/safe night. Don't get into too much trouble.
Me: Yeah, it's straight to bed for this guy. Much longer drive tomorrow. You have yourself a good night as well.
Two days later as I was driving back to my parents' for Christmas
Me: Was just driving by [this city we'd discussed]. How's my emo betty page?
Her the next day, i.e. Christmas eve: Hey sorry, it's been crazy! Emo betty page eh?
Me 4 hours later: If the shoe fits, right
me: Or were they hipster glasses? Either way they worked.
Her 7 hours later: I was shooting more for hipster
Me: I like hipster music better anyway
Me: You doing family Christmas stuff?
her: Nope, eating spaghetti at my place and watching Netflix
Her: with my cat
me: Sounds awesome! You get her a present?
me: Some catnip or whatnot. It's like cocaine but for cats?
What followed was some kind of mundane, "this is what I'm doing, what are you doing" type stuff. I try to keep things positive and upbeat. After a couple back and forth texts:
me: So were you good or naughty this year?
her: I would like to say that I've been good, but this past week hasn't been so much like myself haha
me: Since starting the new job?
her: Yeah
me: Yeah you seemed a little bit naughty when I met you
me:
I thought that would get a quick and enthusiastic response but after two minutes of no response, when the previous texts had been coming within a minute...
me: I got the feeling there's more to you though
me 15 min later: I'm headed to bed. Merry Christmas!
So here's the thing. This girl is both really hot and seemed really fun and interesting. I was annoyed a bit that I met her where she did because of the limitations presented that night (her being at work) and the mindset it put her in for the followup. I should probably have said teased her about being naughty by coming onto me that night rather than just leaving it as it was. After reading about some stripper game, I'm guessing that I said something that was really merely sexually suggestive that made her think I was only into her for sex. She's already given to feeling this way since I saw her strip and tipped her, etc, and doesn't want to feel like that. I didn't mean to be texting her like that on Christmas Eve. I was going to eject right after that.
So I'm somewhat aware of the mistakes I made. The last text was last night. My questions are, what mistakes have I made here? Do you think I'm right about why she dropped out of the texting without so much as a 'goodnight'? Secondly, and more importantly, how do I proceed from here? The trick is going to be to get her to engage me again without lowering my value too much by chasing her.
"Hey, I did not mean to go over the line the other night. I apologize if I did. I just had to know where the line was."
or
"Hey, if I made you uncomfortable the other night, I apologize. I genuinely think you're cool and that we had a connection. Let's pursue that. mmkay?"
I could also just text her again in two days with some typical text game stuff. Should I send a sort of apology text or just try to push through with a playful teasing text?
I'm going to wait until at least the day after tomorrow to see if she responds. Not expecting her to. I could also just go back to the same club and meet up with her. That would be easier and more effective, but then I'd have to make the hour drive again with no guarantee of seeing her. If I go that route, should I ignore her for a while after I get there and make her come talk to me?
Could use some input. Many thanks in advance.
CHAT